Comment from Deborah Marie

Excellent

Nice haiku contest entry. Good progression, rhythm and flow. Clever use of work producing impressive imagery. Good luck, Deb

 Comment Written 19-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 20-Feb-2015

Thanks, Deborah.

I am a little worried that nobody seems to be picking up on the similarity of shapes between the rainbows and the apple boughs, or the wordplay on boughs...

Steve

reply by Deborah Marie on 20-Feb-2015

"work" should be "word" I did notice what you are worried about and others will too, Deb

Comment from Sasha

Excellent

I am a terrible poet and find Haiku's extremely difficult. But you have done a beautiful job with this one. Your last line is perfect and pulls the beauty of this all together so nicely. This is a great entry for this contest and I sincerely wish you all the best.

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 20-Feb-2015

Thanks, Sasha - not really my strength either, but I'll always have a go.

I am a little worried that nobody seems to be picking up on the similarity of shapes between the rainbows and the apple boughs, or the wordplay on boughs...

Steve

reply by Sasha on 20-Feb-2015

Sometime we readers read too much into a poem and other time we miss the clever word plays completely.

Comment from skye

Excellent

misty rainbows
arching down to dewy grass
laden apple boughs

Rain makes trees bloom and apples flourish.
Neat poem about life and the promise that rainbows bring.
Well done.

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 20-Feb-2015

Thank you, Skye

I am a little worried that nobody seems to be picking up on the similarity of shapes between the rainbows and the apple boughs, or the wordplay on boughs...

Steve

reply by skye on 20-Feb-2015

I did not catch it, but when you said it, I thought -- wow. I think rainbows is oh and boughs are ow, so it is very subtle.
The arching branches and the arching rainbow is very clever. Thanks for your creativity.

Comment from Dawny53

Excellent

This is n excellent entry, it gives off good images because of your descriptive rainbow.. and I feel the end line is really effective, can read in a couple of different ways which makes the entire piece stronger.. good luck to you!

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 Comment Written 18-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 20-Feb-2015

Thanks, Dawny.

I am a little worried that nobody seems to be picking up on the similarity of shapes between the rainbows and the apple boughs, or the wordplay on boughs...

Steve