Spotted Fawn
3/5/3 haiku70 total reviews
Comment from stormwolf2
A perfect execution of a 3-5-3. Wonderful subject matter, the beginning of a new life. Nice color scheme too.
Best wishes,
Malcolm
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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A perfect execution of a 3-5-3. Wonderful subject matter, the beginning of a new life. Nice color scheme too.
Best wishes,
Malcolm
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Malcolm - since it's my first 3/5/3 haiku - perfect is such a lovely assessment. LOL Thanks, Brooke :-)
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You are more than welcome!
Warm wishes,
Malcolm :)
Comment from mermaids
Excellent haiku that symbolizes the beginning of spring with the new life of the fawn. Great poem for the arrival of spring, brings up good feelings.
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Excellent haiku that symbolizes the beginning of spring with the new life of the fawn. Great poem for the arrival of spring, brings up good feelings.
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Thanks so much, Brooke :-) I have a poem I'm releasing tomorrow that has mermaids in it - be on the lookout! :-D
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I am so excited, mermaids!!! Can't wait and I am sure it will be great.
Elaine
Comment from Jean Lutz
So easy to picture this new life already starting down the pathway it is to follow. My son and I started feeding a couple of stray cats outside our home. Unfortunately, their payback was kittens. Now we have to try to find homes, but it is so cute to watch the playful furballs. How much we could learn from animals if we only would take the time. Good luck with this piece.
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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So easy to picture this new life already starting down the pathway it is to follow. My son and I started feeding a couple of stray cats outside our home. Unfortunately, their payback was kittens. Now we have to try to find homes, but it is so cute to watch the playful furballs. How much we could learn from animals if we only would take the time. Good luck with this piece.
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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My dad, who was on the board of a camp for disadvantaged kids told me one summer a cat was living there - I would ride my bike every day to feed her - then she had kittens and I rode my bike there every day until they were old enough to give away - luckily, a scout troop used the camp one weekend and took all the kittens while we got to keep the cat. She was fierce during those weeks of protecting her babies at camp - you should see all the squirrels she decapitated to keep them away from her babies!! Thanks for making me remember that :-) And for the review. Brooke :-)
Comment from jshep
Perfect execution of the haiku, Brooke. Really like the line falters to its feet and the satori applies well to both lines. Very well done. Joyce
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Perfect execution of the haiku, Brooke. Really like the line falters to its feet and the satori applies well to both lines. Very well done. Joyce
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Thank you, Joyce, I've never done a 3/5/3 before, so I'm relieved you think it was executed well :-) Brooke
Comment from prodigal
You know, I love haiku. It is strange, but the idea of capturing a thought in this case.. in only 11 syllables appeals to me. You have created a clear and vivid picture of a little baby deer being born. Well done, good luck in the contest- Sam
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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You know, I love haiku. It is strange, but the idea of capturing a thought in this case.. in only 11 syllables appeals to me. You have created a clear and vivid picture of a little baby deer being born. Well done, good luck in the contest- Sam
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Sam, It's my first 3/5/3 - I wrote it several hours too late for the contest, but that's OK. :-) Thanks, Brooke
Comment from Sasha
Sadly I am still not familiar with the many forms of poetry but this one was easy to figure out. Very sweet, simple an to the point. Lovely, well written and brought a smile to my face. Great photograph too.
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Sadly I am still not familiar with the many forms of poetry but this one was easy to figure out. Very sweet, simple an to the point. Lovely, well written and brought a smile to my face. Great photograph too.
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Valerie, thanks so much - this is my first 3/5/3 haiku - there are many forms even for poets. LOL Brooke
Comment from Gert sherwood
Brooke, now your beautiful haiku brought tears to my eyes.
Why? I have seen this amazing scene many times.
One doesn't realize the beauty of seen a baby deer just being born, wonderful image and perfect 3-5-3 hakiu.
Why didn't you enter it in the haiku contest?
Love
Gert
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Brooke, now your beautiful haiku brought tears to my eyes.
Why? I have seen this amazing scene many times.
One doesn't realize the beauty of seen a baby deer just being born, wonderful image and perfect 3-5-3 hakiu.
Why didn't you enter it in the haiku contest?
Love
Gert
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Gert, I have never written a 3/5/3 haiku before, and by the time I finally composed one, the contest was closed! :-D You are such a sensitive soul - thank you for your lovely comments. Brooke
Comment from Joan E.
A well done 3-5-3. You even managed strong alliteration, and your satori is quite successful, which I think is the hardest part of the haiku. You also found the absolutely synergistic picture (I think lawn figures adds a special irony). See you in two weeks--thanks for the send-off. --Joan
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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A well done 3-5-3. You even managed strong alliteration, and your satori is quite successful, which I think is the hardest part of the haiku. You also found the absolutely synergistic picture (I think lawn figures adds a special irony). See you in two weeks--thanks for the send-off. --Joan
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Joan, bon voyage!!!!!! thanks, Brooke
Comment from jadapenn
Hi Brooke, this is so cute. A little dinky-toy of life. Your few words painted this fawn so clearly. Loved the picture and the background colouring. Do you paint? Good sense of colour you have. I loved the haiku. luv jada
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Hi Brooke, this is so cute. A little dinky-toy of life. Your few words painted this fawn so clearly. Loved the picture and the background colouring. Do you paint? Good sense of colour you have. I loved the haiku. luv jada
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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I wish I could paint - yes, I have a great sense of color and design - so I do crafts, like designing my own greeting cards that use fabric and other things that don't require me to draw, but my drawing sucks. The best I can do is little kid-like butterflies and daisies and rainbows. LOL Thanks so much, Brooke :-)
Comment from Mike K2
It strange that you use the words, "falters to", but that is exactly what a fawn or foal does and there isn't much time either. I enjoyed this well written Haiku.
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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It strange that you use the words, "falters to", but that is exactly what a fawn or foal does and there isn't much time either. I enjoyed this well written Haiku.
Comment Written 09-May-2009
reply by the author on 09-May-2009
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Mike, thank you! Brooke :-)
