New Lace Symphony
When loves finds the other.73 total reviews
Comment from justmade
I love how this read. Like love intertwined and ....
I am not sure I totally got around this but what really got me was the artisitc nature of your writing. I thought that was really impressive. Lovely work Mike.
Much love,
Justmade.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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I love how this read. Like love intertwined and ....
I am not sure I totally got around this but what really got me was the artisitc nature of your writing. I thought that was really impressive. Lovely work Mike.
Much love,
Justmade.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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Wow! Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. I always enjoy a poem that I have to go back to in order to appreciate more, with one person, her poetry was indeed a real challange.
Comment from heyjude
Mike,
I think this is a lovely description of a life joined together compared
to this beautiful work of lace. Beautiful imagery. Thanks for doing the research and coming up with this wonderful poem.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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Mike,
I think this is a lovely description of a life joined together compared
to this beautiful work of lace. Beautiful imagery. Thanks for doing the research and coming up with this wonderful poem.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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Revciews like this one make the effort well worth it. I thank you very much for it and the compliments. Mike
Comment from Cookies Cubby
I really enjoyed your poem Mike. You've succeeded in conveying a sense of beauty to the reader and you've avoided the wilderness of abstract nonsense that some modern poets seem keen to fall into. One doesn't have to sit and contemplate for ten minutes trying to understand the meaning of your poem, it's immediately accessible and therefore more enjoyable.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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I really enjoyed your poem Mike. You've succeeded in conveying a sense of beauty to the reader and you've avoided the wilderness of abstract nonsense that some modern poets seem keen to fall into. One doesn't have to sit and contemplate for ten minutes trying to understand the meaning of your poem, it's immediately accessible and therefore more enjoyable.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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I thought wait a minute, the wilderness is in many of my poems? lol I do understand your point. Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. Mike
Comment from gerry26
I loved the first lines. I think you took a very creative approach to this verse. Not many would have thought of it. I liked the flow and all of your words were chosen very well.
gerry
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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I loved the first lines. I think you took a very creative approach to this verse. Not many would have thought of it. I liked the flow and all of your words were chosen very well.
gerry
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. Mike
Comment from Arkangel
Wow, what a departure from your normal writing! This was good and gentle and reveals a more sensitive side of you than that of the fellow carrying the canoe! Dave
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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Wow, what a departure from your normal writing! This was good and gentle and reveals a more sensitive side of you than that of the fellow carrying the canoe! Dave
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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Thank you for the compliments and tis review. Mike
Comment from starman
Great author notes worth a 5 alone. The poem was an elegant composition that beautifully projected the intricacies of the lace symphony. yes, it doe slook like music weaving a colorful pattern. Superb last verse.
)s
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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Great author notes worth a 5 alone. The poem was an elegant composition that beautifully projected the intricacies of the lace symphony. yes, it doe slook like music weaving a colorful pattern. Superb last verse.
)s
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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Wow! Thank you very much for the compliments and this review. Mike
Comment from RaymondJohn
The lovers never get together except in the weaving? New Lace Symphony is a very nice ending for the story. God is the master weaver. Best wishes. Ray
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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The lovers never get together except in the weaving? New Lace Symphony is a very nice ending for the story. God is the master weaver. Best wishes. Ray
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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Thank you very much for the compliments, best wishes and this review.
Comment from ledford
I like your meaning here and the use of sewing as an analogy for life.
There are quite a few areas that I think would benefit from some punctuation revision:
"It starts off with,
two lonely threads." ... comma not needed
"bobbins,
aspects of their being, beliefs
and personality." ... I do not think the comma after "bobbins" works. I recommend an em dash {--}
"each other{;}
says that the weaving can begin." punctuation not needed here
"corner, a dust filled cobweb." I recommend a semi-colon here { }
"throughout each others life." I recommend an apostrophe after "others" and saying "lives"
"Well grounded," I recommend "well-grounded"
"needle {,} forming a picot {,} and they"
"This masterpiece will never be done
because with the thoughts of me
to you and you to me." This is a sentance fragment that, on its own, does not make sense. I recommend "This masterpiece will never be done,
because with the thoughts of me
to you and you to me,
we will make the perfect lace that..."
Once the punctuation is fixed, this will be really good.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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I like your meaning here and the use of sewing as an analogy for life.
There are quite a few areas that I think would benefit from some punctuation revision:
"It starts off with,
two lonely threads." ... comma not needed
"bobbins,
aspects of their being, beliefs
and personality." ... I do not think the comma after "bobbins" works. I recommend an em dash {--}
"each other{;}
says that the weaving can begin." punctuation not needed here
"corner, a dust filled cobweb." I recommend a semi-colon here { }
"throughout each others life." I recommend an apostrophe after "others" and saying "lives"
"Well grounded," I recommend "well-grounded"
"needle {,} forming a picot {,} and they"
"This masterpiece will never be done
because with the thoughts of me
to you and you to me." This is a sentance fragment that, on its own, does not make sense. I recommend "This masterpiece will never be done,
because with the thoughts of me
to you and you to me,
we will make the perfect lace that..."
Once the punctuation is fixed, this will be really good.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
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Sorry to have put you off, but I needed that block of time to evaluate each one and most of your's ar better choices for the poem. Please feel free to once again look at the peice and possibly edit your rating. I thank you very much for taking the time to review this, for the patience and this review. Mike
Comment from steevie
An interesting take on tapestry. You entwined the theme of sewing and life togther very well.. Good use og imagery
well layed out and flowed nicely
steve
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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An interesting take on tapestry. You entwined the theme of sewing and life togther very well.. Good use og imagery
well layed out and flowed nicely
steve
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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Thank you very much for your compliments and this review.
Comment from eraserlynch
What a wonderfully clever poem, and even better that it is written by a bloke!! This is wonderfully romantic with awesome use of analogy to weave a wonderful picture of love. Awesome, awesome, awesome. Look forward to reading more soon.
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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What a wonderfully clever poem, and even better that it is written by a bloke!! This is wonderfully romantic with awesome use of analogy to weave a wonderful picture of love. Awesome, awesome, awesome. Look forward to reading more soon.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
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I love this review! Thank you so much for the compliments, too.
