Red Riding Hood - the Truth
The Wolf's Story in Rhyming Quatrains95 total reviews
Comment from rmdelta
Brooke,
Yep-shoulda guessed you'd take the dang wolf's side in this affair. Always looking out for the poor wolves, huh? Never mind poor ole granny lying in his belly.
Great take on this fairy tale. you did an outstanding job with it and it is a fantasticly great contest entry. You should do well. Good luck.
Reggie
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
Brooke,
Yep-shoulda guessed you'd take the dang wolf's side in this affair. Always looking out for the poor wolves, huh? Never mind poor ole granny lying in his belly.
Great take on this fairy tale. you did an outstanding job with it and it is a fantasticly great contest entry. You should do well. Good luck.
Reggie
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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There WAS NO granny - it was a scam, and I'm sticking to our story! LOLOLOL Thanks so much,Reggie,my dear cop friend. :-) Brooke
Comment from perunest
Oh, my! Your story has me weeping for the wolf!
Okay, maybe not weeping, but feeling really
bad over the horrible little witch and her
devious plot! Great job - a real winner! I'll
always remember this side of the story! Carolyn
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
Oh, my! Your story has me weeping for the wolf!
Okay, maybe not weeping, but feeling really
bad over the horrible little witch and her
devious plot! Great job - a real winner! I'll
always remember this side of the story! Carolyn
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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hey, don't take back the weeping - he was killed and then blamed for his own death by accusing him of a crime!! LOL
thanks so much,Brooke :-)
Comment from Mike K2
I enjoyed this and the twist. I would have given it a six, because just as much a fable, this one is two as with family camping, I have seen this side. Boy did it rack my nerves. Good job!
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
I enjoyed this and the twist. I would have given it a six, because just as much a fable, this one is two as with family camping, I have seen this side. Boy did it rack my nerves. Good job!
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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I'm so glad you enjoyed this!! thank you,Brooke
Comment from Juleeann
I like your twist on this old fashioned tale. You have a way with words and made me kinda like the big bad wolf. Good job, carry on, and
God bless,
Juleeann
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
I like your twist on this old fashioned tale. You have a way with words and made me kinda like the big bad wolf. Good job, carry on, and
God bless,
Juleeann
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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That wolf is lovable!!! Of course you like him. LOL Thanks, Brooke
Comment from dtimes3
Okay, it's worth a six for the tale, the twist, and the creativity-the rhyme, the logic, and the flow. It also amused me greatly and I had to laugh. This is a wonderful poem exactly because it appeals to those of us who seek suprise as one of the major elements of good poetry. Thank you Brooke for starting my day out with a bang.
99% of the time I don't get to toss any suggestions your way but try these on and see what you think:
S1/L2&3 I would eliminate the "'s" in from "story's" and just go with "story." Nothing is lost and I believe it reads easier in juxtaposition to "grandmother's" "'s".
S5/L2 change "Please go ahead" to "Please proceed" and change "Gran's" back to "Granny's" - keeps the continuity of Granny's name without changing the meter and adds the "P" alliteration.
Thanks again.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
Okay, it's worth a six for the tale, the twist, and the creativity-the rhyme, the logic, and the flow. It also amused me greatly and I had to laugh. This is a wonderful poem exactly because it appeals to those of us who seek suprise as one of the major elements of good poetry. Thank you Brooke for starting my day out with a bang.
99% of the time I don't get to toss any suggestions your way but try these on and see what you think:
S1/L2&3 I would eliminate the "'s" in from "story's" and just go with "story." Nothing is lost and I believe it reads easier in juxtaposition to "grandmother's" "'s".
S5/L2 change "Please go ahead" to "Please proceed" and change "Gran's" back to "Granny's" - keeps the continuity of Granny's name without changing the meter and adds the "P" alliteration.
Thanks again.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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I will reread the poem with your suggestions in mind - thank you for the input and for the fantastic review!!! Brooke
Comment from chaswriter
Brooke - You amaze me. What a delightful, humor-filled poem for the ages. You depicted the wolf's POV with humor and logic. I loved it. A 6-star review is what it should get but I have none. Charlie
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
Brooke - You amaze me. What a delightful, humor-filled poem for the ages. You depicted the wolf's POV with humor and logic. I loved it. A 6-star review is what it should get but I have none. Charlie
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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Charlie, thanks so much for such an enthusiastic review, even if you have squandered your 6's! LOL Brooke
Comment from teafor2
adewpearl--An excellent parody of the original
story. Personally, I too pegged the child as a
prevaricator from the jump-smile. Glad to see
I am not alone:). You've facetiously covered all
of the main issues I had about "Little Red Rid-
ing Hood" and her version of what happened that
day. Thanks for this witty bit of levity, it's
an excellent entry for the contest and a keeper.
teafor2
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
adewpearl--An excellent parody of the original
story. Personally, I too pegged the child as a
prevaricator from the jump-smile. Glad to see
I am not alone:). You've facetiously covered all
of the main issues I had about "Little Red Rid-
ing Hood" and her version of what happened that
day. Thanks for this witty bit of levity, it's
an excellent entry for the contest and a keeper.
teafor2
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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Prevaricator and murderer!! LOL Thanks so much, Brooke
Comment from Karen B.
You've completely convinced me of his innocence, lol, you'd make a good lawyer. Great rhymes, fun to read. Good luck in the contest! Karen
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
You've completely convinced me of his innocence, lol, you'd make a good lawyer. Great rhymes, fun to read. Good luck in the contest! Karen
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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Karen, thanks so much for your most positive comments, and of course he's innocent!!! LOL Brooke
Comment from Dave Austin
Debunking children's stories will go over big with the with-it modern kids. Great sense of humor, so much needed in the world of poetry, what with all the negative stuff. Love, daver
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
Debunking children's stories will go over big with the with-it modern kids. Great sense of humor, so much needed in the world of poetry, what with all the negative stuff. Love, daver
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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Dave, yes, sometimes I grow weary of the "I'm gonna slit my throat because my lover left me" poems. LOL thanks so much, Brooke
Comment from earthlybeing
Ah now we get to hear the rest of the story. Too cute and well written. I love the flow and that you have given his side. Well done. Thanks, Jeanette
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
Ah now we get to hear the rest of the story. Too cute and well written. I love the flow and that you have given his side. Well done. Thanks, Jeanette
Comment Written 22-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2009
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Jeanette - it was my sacred duty to spread the truth! LOL Thanks, Brooke