Trapped
5-7-5 Contest22 total reviews
Comment from jpduck
Although I know nothing about poetry, it seems to me that this 5-7-5 is actually a 4-8-5. Presumably it will be disqualified for the contest. A shame, because I liked it; I recognise the phenomenon you describe.
Presumably you could move the 'with' from the start of the second line to the end of the first.
Adrian
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2016
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Although I know nothing about poetry, it seems to me that this 5-7-5 is actually a 4-8-5. Presumably it will be disqualified for the contest. A shame, because I liked it; I recognise the phenomenon you describe.
Presumably you could move the 'with' from the start of the second line to the end of the first.
Adrian
Comment Written 18-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2016
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Thanks, Adrian.
Yep, I mucked up the line formatting for this - hope I got it fixed in time.
Steve
Comment from MacMhuirich
You may be trapped my friend, but the pain will be less from those tongue lashings :) A wonderful write for the 5-7-5 contest. Thank you for sharing and best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John
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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2016
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You may be trapped my friend, but the pain will be less from those tongue lashings :) A wonderful write for the 5-7-5 contest. Thank you for sharing and best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2016
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Thanks, John. There's something to be said for a thick shell!
Steve
