haiku (cold cruel breezes blow)
Some secrets are best left buried...74 total reviews
Comment from lindalcreel
I wish I understood poetry better. When my writing and editing slow down, I may have to take a class. For now, I'll just sit back and enjoy the other wonderful pieces coming form the more experienced authors.
  |
I wish I understood poetry better. When my writing and editing slow down, I may have to take a class. For now, I'll just sit back and enjoy the other wonderful pieces coming form the more experienced authors.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
Comment from brentman99
An interesting poem with a good picture that enhances the impact of the text. You must spend a lot of time combing various sites looking for the perfect picture, or you're quite an artist.
Nothing to comment on style-wise as it works. Thanks for sharing, Brent.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
|
An interesting poem with a good picture that enhances the impact of the text. You must spend a lot of time combing various sites looking for the perfect picture, or you're quite an artist.
Nothing to comment on style-wise as it works. Thanks for sharing, Brent.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
-
Thanks, Brent. I really appreciate the thoughtful comments.
I have literally thousands of pictures and animations saved on my photobucket.com account, as well as on flash drives. I do lots of book covers for a few of my friends who are published authors. Check out Don Holbrook on Amazon. I did his book covers on the Templar Knights.
Much obliged! :)
Comment from mfowler
This has all of your hallmarks including the brillaint setup. But, your 'resting in pieces line' had me in bits. Very clever and a fine complementary line to:cold cruel breezes blow unearthing buried secrets. A very good response to the prompt, I'd say. Too late for best wishes now that your bones/name has been revealed???
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
|
This has all of your hallmarks including the brillaint setup. But, your 'resting in pieces line' had me in bits. Very clever and a fine complementary line to:cold cruel breezes blow unearthing buried secrets. A very good response to the prompt, I'd say. Too late for best wishes now that your bones/name has been revealed???
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
-
Ha ha, thanks, Mark, but the contest is still going on and will be until 2:00 pm today. You are seeing my name because it is not a blind entry contest. All the authors names are on display.
Thanks for the excellent review, my friend.
-
I'm gunna vote for you.
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is yet another chilling tale that the author has created with this poem. This is a shorter version for you, but it still gets the message across. Good luck with the contest.
|
This is yet another chilling tale that the author has created with this poem. This is a shorter version for you, but it still gets the message across. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
Comment from rjuselius
"cold cruel breezes blow
unearthing buried secrets
resting in pieces"
i think this is a fabulous piece of horror! i like the use of alliteration, it isn't too much. love the satori! it is a gem!
thank you for sharing!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x
 |
"cold cruel breezes blow
unearthing buried secrets
resting in pieces"
i think this is a fabulous piece of horror! i like the use of alliteration, it isn't too much. love the satori! it is a gem!
thank you for sharing!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
Comment from Jackarrie
Hi DEan, this deserves a six, it has great imagination, the right side of your brain was highly active when you wrote and presented this masterpiece of a horror haiku.
I love the satori line "Pieces"
So many bones have been uncovered by the wind, and it is great that we live in the age with DNA etc.
A definite winner.
Mary
|
Hi DEan, this deserves a six, it has great imagination, the right side of your brain was highly active when you wrote and presented this masterpiece of a horror haiku.
I love the satori line "Pieces"
So many bones have been uncovered by the wind, and it is great that we live in the age with DNA etc.
A definite winner.
Mary
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
Comment from country ranch writer
oh goodie ruffled feathers look good on one sitting still makes them wonder what you are up to or about to do hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
|
oh goodie ruffled feathers look good on one sitting still makes them wonder what you are up to or about to do hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
-
Ha-ha, you said it, country! You always manage to brighten my day, LOL!
Thanks so much for the entertaining review and those shiny six stars. Who loves ya, darlin'? I do, that's who!
Thanks, country. :)
-
AWE YOU ARE THE SWEETEST, MAKING ME SMILE, HEY I GOT A AUTOGRAPHED BOOK FROM DIANNE FANNING JUST OUT OF THE BLUE. WOW WAS I EVER SURPRISED. SHE IS THE ONE WHO HAS KEPT ME WRITING ALON TIME AGO AND NOW YOU KEEP ME ON MY TOES HAHA YOUWILL HAVE TO SEND ME A SIGNED ON FOR MY COLLECTION. HEHE
HOWS MY BARREL RACER DOING THESE DAYS? BET SHE KEEPS YOU ON YOUR TOES HEHE. AWE SHUCKS YOU ARE SO KIND GOT ME TO BLUSHING AGAIN
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi Dean,
Indeed, resting in pieces! Them bones, them bones, them damn bones!
As always, great poem with awesome artwork. Nice presentation. Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*^*)
|
Hi Dean,
Indeed, resting in pieces! Them bones, them bones, them damn bones!
As always, great poem with awesome artwork. Nice presentation. Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*^*)
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
Comment from Val Crisson
Great drama here in a horror haiku, but I think it can be better. I feel the first line would be more effective, if it read "cold breeze blows." I realize you have to many "s" endings in your last two lines, but I'm sure you can handle it with a few word changes. Very creative presentation, and please let me know if you make any changes. Good luck
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
 |
Great drama here in a horror haiku, but I think it can be better. I feel the first line would be more effective, if it read "cold breeze blows." I realize you have to many "s" endings in your last two lines, but I'm sure you can handle it with a few word changes. Very creative presentation, and please let me know if you make any changes. Good luck
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
Comment from Winslow
Dear Macabre Master,
Did you ever wonder what the unearthed bones of men and women who died long ago think when they are dug up and examined for advancement of knowledge? Perhaps that is what your poem is all about but I don't know.
Warm regards,
Winslow
|
Dear Macabre Master,
Did you ever wonder what the unearthed bones of men and women who died long ago think when they are dug up and examined for advancement of knowledge? Perhaps that is what your poem is all about but I don't know.
Warm regards,
Winslow
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
