Comment from IndianaIrish

Excellent

A moving poem, Brooke. Those shattered dreams sure can change our outlook and how we continue to go after those dreams. Do people actually comment on modifying a form??
Indy :>)

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Even with my author's notes, I still had one traditionalist rate this down - just goes to prove you can't please everyone! LOL Thanks, Karyn. Brooke :-)

Comment from Margaret Snowdon

Excellent

As always, a well thoughtout
and well presented piece
of verse -- with a smooth
flow and excellent rhyme,
Brooke. Late today, just
switched on at 4.40pm.

Margaret.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thank you, Margaret - you're allowed to do things in the real world that make you late once in awhile! :-) Brooke

Comment from jadapenn

Excellent

Hi Brooke, this was lovely. When first I wished upon a star. Boy, what faith and dreams we have. But somewhere we take a wrong step and give up too soon. One needs to keep those wide eyes open and focus on the faith and dreams.
Absolutely wonderful presentation.
Thanks for sharing - luv jada. Oh, happy Thanksgiving to you.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thanks, dear friend - and Thanksgiving to you, too, many miles across the seas :-) Brooke

Comment from Patrick G Cox

Excellent

Hi Brooke,

Lovely triolet invoking some fun and some sad memories I think. The disappointment when those wishes don't come true, and the realisation that perhaps one is asking the wrong question comes later.

Patrick

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

thank you, Patrick :-) You are most perceptive. Brooke

Comment from Debbie0

Excellent

This is so simple and yet so beautiful and so very true, when we are young we believe with all out heart and soul but life leaves it's scars and so wishing no longer works, if only it still could.

Lovely poem from the number one

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thank you, Debbie - I truly appreciate your kind review :-) Brooke

Comment from MuChunGe

Excellent

Hey, you have edified me with your Author Notes. I never heard of a "TRIOLET" before. It is unlikely that I have ever read one before either. Well, at least not knowingly read one.

Your triolet [it is now officially part of my vocabulary] is telling, moving and beautiful. -David

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thank you, David - it is a wonderfully musical form. Brooke :-)

Comment from mermaids

Excellent

This captures thte child like innocence and then the reality of the real world when we grow up. Great verses and lines, you convey well the emotion of life's impact on us.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thank you, Elaine - as always, I appreciate your thoughtfulness :-) Brooke

Comment from tonydem

Excellent

You just put a damper on Disney for me. I love that song. I remember as a kid on Saturday night hearing that song and I'd come running. LOL Oh well! Excellent flow to these triolets.
This poems seems perfect for this form. You've said all you needed to say in 8 lines to get the point across. Which by the way to me is; growing up is hard to do. Well done!
Tony

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Hey, I still love the song and still clap for Tinkerbell too! :-) Thanks, Tony. We could start a name your favorite Disney song contest - there are so many great ones! Brooke

Comment from Winslow

Excellent

Dear Brooke,

Ah, the innocence of a child, too bad we all grow up. We come into this world without any emotional baggage, and then it becomes filled and we jaded. Good rhyming, but harsh sounds somehow detract, at least for me. You probably did this intentionally, did you?

Happy Thanksgiving,

Winslow

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thank you, Winslow - how right you are. I'm not sure what harsh sounds you mean. Brooke :-)

reply by Winslow on 25-Nov-2009

Dear Brooke, You repeat star three times and use mar and scar for rhymes. These are all abrupt, short words, which to me are harsh. Also the picture is very brite, almost garish in nature. Again this is uust an individulal opinion Warm regards, Winslow

Comment from joan marie

Excellent

If only we could maintain or recover that innocence, what a different world we would see. I know I would love naptime. LOL joan marie

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2009

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2009

Thank you, Joan Marie - you are so right! Brooke :-)