Paranoia
mental illness33 total reviews
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
I, too, have a mental illness and at one point was losing everything as you describe. With proper treatment mine is well controlled and life is good. I could definitely identify with this poem~Debbie
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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I, too, have a mental illness and at one point was losing everything as you describe. With proper treatment mine is well controlled and life is good. I could definitely identify with this poem~Debbie
Comment Written 05-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Yes, it is difficult, isn't it? But we made it through. Thanks for a good review.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, alvin, you did a great job writing this sonnet about the illness people don't want to talk about, great picture choice. i wish you the best of luck in the contest
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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this is very well written, alvin, you did a great job writing this sonnet about the illness people don't want to talk about, great picture choice. i wish you the best of luck in the contest
Comment Written 05-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Thanks for a great review.
Comment from Glasstruth
The sonnet reads well. I can relate to being afraid. It's a common feeling among people, but to some it's obsessive. Toward the end you write about mental illness which would explain it here. Good luck with the contest! Les
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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The sonnet reads well. I can relate to being afraid. It's a common feeling among people, but to some it's obsessive. Toward the end you write about mental illness which would explain it here. Good luck with the contest! Les
Comment Written 05-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Thanks for your good wishes.
Comment from visionary1234
You have certainly stuck to the sonnet form though with a little irregularity of meter in the concluding couplet - but you tell a good, tense story with modern day reflection. Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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You have certainly stuck to the sonnet form though with a little irregularity of meter in the concluding couplet - but you tell a good, tense story with modern day reflection. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Yes, I just didn't know how to work out that concluding couplet in! Thanks for a good review.
Comment from Spitfire
I just spent my whole day trying to write a sonnet. Never again. Worse than childbirth. My hat is off to anyone who tries it. End rhyme is more natural sounding than mine.
I still can't figure out a perfect iamb beat. Even nursery rhymes use the stressed/unstressed form (trochaic, I think)
Anyway, the change is in the third quatrain and the couplet works well. Good luck, Al, in the contest.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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I just spent my whole day trying to write a sonnet. Never again. Worse than childbirth. My hat is off to anyone who tries it. End rhyme is more natural sounding than mine.
I still can't figure out a perfect iamb beat. Even nursery rhymes use the stressed/unstressed form (trochaic, I think)
Anyway, the change is in the third quatrain and the couplet works well. Good luck, Al, in the contest.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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I would recommend Brooke's class on Sonnets. I think that would help. Thanks for a good review.
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
Alvin:
Mental illness is a terrible thing to bear
but sometimes it's all I have to share
I'd say more about it if I only dared
but then the demon inside might begin to think I cared
good luck in the contest
thanks for sharing
love,
jan
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Alvin:
Mental illness is a terrible thing to bear
but sometimes it's all I have to share
I'd say more about it if I only dared
but then the demon inside might begin to think I cared
good luck in the contest
thanks for sharing
love,
jan
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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I think you said this better than I did! Thanks for a good review.
Comment from Day Z Chayn
Al,
This hit home since most relatives on my mother's side are blessed with mental imbalances of one type or another, while the relatives on my father's side possess various physical maladies instead. PTSD. Schizophrenia. Bipolar disorder/manic depression, and even autism (specifically Asperger's Syndrome) seem to top the list, followed up with dementia/Alzheimer's disease and alcoholism there on the side of the plate.
Not complaining though, as I am not the individual amongst all these individuals in my family who suffers most; I am taking care of my aging mother now & the irony of all this is that I've never owned a car, and never learned to walk.
What's really wrong with people in this country seems to be that not enough compassion is given to the elderly or mentally ill citizens of this nation, any more than respect may or may not be given for literacy or literature in this country with the promotion or propagation of same, at least not perhaps today.
As an (ominous) side-note, I've know seven people in my life who have committed suicide, four or five of whom were former members in my church.
Not to boast, but it was suggested at least once by my own father that I might have reason to pass on in much the same manner. Though thoughts like these are freely expressed against me from time to time, I find them wholly inexcusable in circumstances such as mine, especially amongst adult members of our so called 'enlightened' and 'progressive' society. if the United States of America in collective ignorance ought to be labeled or classified as such.
I would suggest here that a person with a mental illness is not the individual who has the problem, although the people around he or she may be more problematic than need be in this case.
This is a wonderful example of the use of the sonnet form for the expression of a subject which not often seems to be expressed coherently from the viewpoint of an 'outsider', meaning here that not everyone who has (but also at the same time has not) experienced mental illness in any particular guise does not necessarily write about such conflict effectively.
This is a singular exception, especially in terms of formal poetic structured form in this case.
Blessings,
Shane
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Al,
This hit home since most relatives on my mother's side are blessed with mental imbalances of one type or another, while the relatives on my father's side possess various physical maladies instead. PTSD. Schizophrenia. Bipolar disorder/manic depression, and even autism (specifically Asperger's Syndrome) seem to top the list, followed up with dementia/Alzheimer's disease and alcoholism there on the side of the plate.
Not complaining though, as I am not the individual amongst all these individuals in my family who suffers most; I am taking care of my aging mother now & the irony of all this is that I've never owned a car, and never learned to walk.
What's really wrong with people in this country seems to be that not enough compassion is given to the elderly or mentally ill citizens of this nation, any more than respect may or may not be given for literacy or literature in this country with the promotion or propagation of same, at least not perhaps today.
As an (ominous) side-note, I've know seven people in my life who have committed suicide, four or five of whom were former members in my church.
Not to boast, but it was suggested at least once by my own father that I might have reason to pass on in much the same manner. Though thoughts like these are freely expressed against me from time to time, I find them wholly inexcusable in circumstances such as mine, especially amongst adult members of our so called 'enlightened' and 'progressive' society. if the United States of America in collective ignorance ought to be labeled or classified as such.
I would suggest here that a person with a mental illness is not the individual who has the problem, although the people around he or she may be more problematic than need be in this case.
This is a wonderful example of the use of the sonnet form for the expression of a subject which not often seems to be expressed coherently from the viewpoint of an 'outsider', meaning here that not everyone who has (but also at the same time has not) experienced mental illness in any particular guise does not necessarily write about such conflict effectively.
This is a singular exception, especially in terms of formal poetic structured form in this case.
Blessings,
Shane
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2012
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Thanks for a great review. When I lived in Copenhagen, I was struck by the different way mental illnesses were treated in Denmark and here in the U.S.
Comment from Writingfundimension
I can't comment knowledgably on the form, but the content is extremely powerful. I've been afraid of voices in the night and the dark at times in my life and you describe it vividly, Alvin. This is a great contest entry in my book. I wish you luck! Warm regards, Bev
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2012
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I can't comment knowledgably on the form, but the content is extremely powerful. I've been afraid of voices in the night and the dark at times in my life and you describe it vividly, Alvin. This is a great contest entry in my book. I wish you luck! Warm regards, Bev
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2012
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Thanks for an excellent review and your good wishes.
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You're very welcome, Alvin.
Comment from mermaids
You capture well the struggle those have with mental illness. Excellent use of words that describe the takeover of hearing voices and how it is life changing. Best wishes for the contest.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2012
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You capture well the struggle those have with mental illness. Excellent use of words that describe the takeover of hearing voices and how it is life changing. Best wishes for the contest.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2012
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Thanks for an excellent and understanding review.
Comment from Belinda
Hi, Alvin. What an amazing description of that certain state of mind, paranoia, written in the difficult form of a sonnet too. This is thought provoking.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2012
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Hi, Alvin. What an amazing description of that certain state of mind, paranoia, written in the difficult form of a sonnet too. This is thought provoking.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2012
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Thanks for an excellent review and your kinds words.
