Humor Fiction posted February 25, 2018 |
courtesy of the minions.
Joke page
by JanPerry
Where the jokes are "on the house!"
It goes Monday, Tuesday then WTF.
I just wanted to tell everyone I'm finally getting married on February the 30th.
When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower gets turned on.
What did one butt cheek say to the other one?
If we pull together, we can stop this shit!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snow balls of course!
"Hush little laptop, don't you cry........
Mommas gonna find you some more Wi-Fi."
I thought "air was free" until I bought a bag of chips!
What's the best thing about childhood? Not paying bills!
"Why am I getting a speeding ticket? If you caught me, then you were speeding too!"
If you figure me out - then I want an explanation.
If only going to the gym was as easy as going to the fridge.
I hate it when I try to eat salad and it accidentally falls in the bin and I have to eat pizza instead.
Stalking is when two people go for a long Romantic Walk together, but only one knows about it.
I pointed to two drunk old bastards sitting across the bar from us and said,
"that's us in ten years time."
My friend says, "that's a mirror you moron."
Don't ever give up on your dreams, keep sleeping.
boom! boom!
Where the jokes are "on the house!"
It goes Monday, Tuesday then WTF.
I just wanted to tell everyone I'm finally getting married on February the 30th.
When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower gets turned on.
What did one butt cheek say to the other one?
If we pull together, we can stop this shit!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snow balls of course!
"Hush little laptop, don't you cry........
Mommas gonna find you some more Wi-Fi."
I thought "air was free" until I bought a bag of chips!
What's the best thing about childhood? Not paying bills!
"Why am I getting a speeding ticket? If you caught me, then you were speeding too!"
If you figure me out - then I want an explanation.
If only going to the gym was as easy as going to the fridge.
I hate it when I try to eat salad and it accidentally falls in the bin and I have to eat pizza instead.
Stalking is when two people go for a long Romantic Walk together, but only one knows about it.
I pointed to two drunk old bastards sitting across the bar from us and said,
"that's us in ten years time."
My friend says, "that's a mirror you moron."
Don't ever give up on your dreams, keep sleeping.
boom! boom!
It goes Monday, Tuesday then WTF.
I just wanted to tell everyone I'm finally getting married on February the 30th.
When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower gets turned on.
What did one butt cheek say to the other one?
If we pull together, we can stop this shit!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snow balls of course!
"Hush little laptop, don't you cry........
Mommas gonna find you some more Wi-Fi."
I thought "air was free" until I bought a bag of chips!
What's the best thing about childhood? Not paying bills!
"Why am I getting a speeding ticket? If you caught me, then you were speeding too!"
If you figure me out - then I want an explanation.
If only going to the gym was as easy as going to the fridge.
I hate it when I try to eat salad and it accidentally falls in the bin and I have to eat pizza instead.
Stalking is when two people go for a long Romantic Walk together, but only one knows about it.
I pointed to two drunk old bastards sitting across the bar from us and said,
"that's us in ten years time."
My friend says, "that's a mirror you moron."
Don't ever give up on your dreams, keep sleeping.
boom! boom!
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