Darkness protects us from seeing the things we would rather not see. To me the darkness is a strategy for shutting down the overwhelming pain of depression. One of the cruelest things about this illness, and yes it is an illness, that it can trick the sufferer into thinking that their pain is permanent.

Most people who suffer from depression had someone say this to them at one point in time. "Pull yourself together" or "get over it" But it just doesn't work like that. A person suffering cannot just snap out of it. Depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. It is a deficiency of serotonin, dopamine, adrenaline or noradrenaline.

All of the people that I have met want so badly to feel their normal self again. What they need is the right help to get that imbalance back into a healthy way of living. There are always exceptions to every rule, but the vast majority of people suffering depression are most certainly not attention seekers. As a matter of fact, they hate people to know how they really feel. They say, "I'm fine" when they feel miserable. They also go to extremes to hide how they feel to family and friends.

Well, this is what I used to do, out of fear of being judged or discriminated against. I was told I was predisposed to depression because of my parents. I do believe this to be true because all of my siblings suffer or have suffered anxiety and depression.

The feeling of being in a black hole, not wanting to rise your head from the pillow, dragging your feet, everything is such a burden. It is so difficult to understand because you can look back as see yourself full of vibrant health. Wishing you could only feel well again.

The help I received from reading the whole mental heath situation really benefited me. It took three years before I could say I was back to enjoying my life.

I have learned to empower myself, by knowing I always have a choice. I choose to see the light, so fear does not creep in. I detach myself from negative thoughts, so I can come out of my head and into my heart. I strive to go with the flow of every moment.

"You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you" ~James Allen.

A cruel illness
nobody can see
grieving internally
In isolation
cries from within
A barren mind