| General Script posted August 11, 2014 | Chapters: |
...39 40 -41- 42... 
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A scene
A chapter in the book Scenes
Bad Dad
by Bill Schott
DAD. Son? Can you give me a hand. LAD. How about just the finger (gesturing with a middle digit) DAD. C'mon. I need help with this math assignment. LAD. The deal was --- you do my homework and I don't tell your new wife about your new girlfriend. DAD. I've already written two APA research papers, created a Jeopardy game on PowerPoint as a science peer quiz, bought ten packages of frozen cookie dough for your drama club fund raiser, and called a bomb threat into your school on test day. LAD. Your work ethic is impressive. Too bad you're such a failure as a role model. DAD. Is there a cheat sheet for these math problems. LAD. No, but there's a math sheet about your cheating problem. DAD. What does that mean? LAD. It means I've added up all your indiscretions. DAD. Oh? LAD. Yep. Let's see. You plus your first wife equals two. Plus my mom equals three, minus first wife equals two. Plus me, your stepson, equals three, plus your ex-wife equals four, minus my mom equals three plus new girlfriend equals four minus one, your ex-wife, which leaves three minus girlfriend who stole your car equals two plus new wife equals three. DAD. All that math equals nada because the answer is old news. My wife knows I'm no saint. LAD. Maybe, but you know and I know that if she adds two and two together, which would make her a genius compared to your other women, she will cut you off and cut your wealth in half. DAD. Okay. I'll do the math. ((Aside)) (...and the math says add one hit man minus one stepson equals happy couple -- plus one girlfriend) EPILOGUE: DAD gets run over by a bus; LAD receives half of inheritance and insurance from generous stepmother who also ends up doing LAD's homework.
Thanks to Bertodi for art
Pays
one point
and 2 member cents. Artwork by Renate-Bertodi at FanArtReview.com 
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