Our trolley is the fastest in the whole darn world,
With a rattle and a clang and a whim-wham bang,
You'd better hold on tight or you'll find you're being hurled,
With a clangour and a banger and a ding-dong dang.

The steering's kinda wobbly and she don't have any brakes,
With a whizzle and a wheezle and a claptrap clink,
But she'll hurtle down the hillside, better hope there's no mistakes,
With a rumble and a tumble and a bonk-bunk bink.

Now the Wilson boys are braggin' about how they're gonna whump us,
With a razzle and a dazzle and a wham-bam slam,
Well, they'd better have a rocket and they'd better make a rumpus,
With a crashing and a smashing and a big, bad blam.

When the starter fires his pistol and those crazy wheels start spinning,
With a hustle and a bustle and a jim-jam jolt,
Why, we'll take the lead and keep it, there's no way that we ain't winning
With a crickle and a crackle like a lightning bolt!