Photograph copyright 2009 by Michael W. Kohlman. For comparison to the pile of steamed brethren, the blue crab in the foreground is a live one. Was...

I would like to thank Conrad Crabs on Joppa Road in Baltimore for their service and supplying me with a live blue crab. This worked out very good to me as one can see the contrast between the live one and the steamed ones. Conrad Crabs are as mentioned in my work, "Performance Problems - Production" as the went on the most popular morning show and made the claim that they were the best. I was just happy that they were able to accommodate me and wasn't prepared for the experience.

Conrad's Crabs is owned by a person who had several prior generations work as watermen and in the seafood restaurant business. Being a waterman, they go out every day and get the crabs that they cook. On 98ROCK he touts himself as the best and that was exactly my experience. The crabs were totally filled with meat larger them normal and the meat was surprisingly sweet and had a taste similar to what one smells when sailing on the Chesapeake Bay. The richness of the crab meat also surprised me and along with a couple of beers and ears of corn, I could only eat five of them and was completely stuffed. The only complaint I had ever heard is that the crabs are too spicy, but to me, most crab places aren't spicy enough. The spice mixture that they use is very good and it is easy to control the amount of spices that remain on your fingers with a paper towel and a finger bowl of water. They also maintain a website, conradscrabs.com where one can read further and also order crabs and crab cakes on line.

A dozen steamed jumbo Maryland Blue Crabs will cost about $85.00. Many of the crabs in Maryland actually go to Europe and we import from North Carolina, Texas and Louisiana. They may be a little cheaper then our local crabs but there is a loss in the taste. Perhaps it is because they have to water them in order to keep them alive. There are a couple of businesses that steam crabs right down the street and at least three more that are within a few miles. You know when a house has had a crab feast as they spoil very quick and one can smell them in the trash that is put out. Fairly ripe in strength, but not necessarily unpleasant. There are also many more seafood places and restaurants that also sell steamed crabs and I recommend that anyone visiting, give them a try.

I couldn't think to write the poem any other way as what is presented is basically the way that I was exposed to them. Children usually like cracking the claws, but the first time that pound everything into a paste, then mom or dad give them meat from the body, but most children are put off at the prospect of cleaning them. Eventually that apprehension fads and they join with the adults at the table, only being moderated with the amount of time it takes to pick through them. The older you get, the more that time becomes enjoyable.

Crabs are placed in layers live and over top of each layer, Chesapeake Bay style seasoning is used with salt. Old Bay produced by McCormick spices is a popular mixture, which contains celery salt, mustard seed, red pepper, black pepper, bay leaves, cloves allspice, ginger, mace cardamom, cinnamon and paprika. Most places that steam crabs, crab houses and even many families have their own special spice mixture.

Many also steam them in a mixture of water, beer and vinegar. To me, that is the way to go as the meat is cooked and kept moist without it drowning in too much water. The other way is how many do it, (and swear by) in Louisiana. There they mix in the water, a variety of seasonings, including vegetable like celery and fruits like lemons; before putting the seafood in the pot.

In the 70s and 80s, dad regularly had crabs, but as they became more imported, he lost interest as he felt that the quality as well as taste went down. It is nothing like spending that money and finding out that many of the crabs are empty. This is due to the fact that the crab is growing into it new shell and in my opinion, should have been thrown back into the water to grow and fill out.

To me, when dad first invited me to have beer told me that he thought I was mature enough in his eyes. In most others, this was objected to and he stated that he wanted to bring me up in a more European manner so that I wouldn't go out sneaking beer with my friends. That didn't exactly work, as in ninth grade it was drinking that always got me caught. However, I did feel that I outgrew that aspect of getting drunk that most teens go through. I quickly bored of those type of parties as their wasn't much else going on to keep my attention. It seemed that anytime we sat down to crabs, there was always a jokester using them to scare the kids in some fashion.

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