Dinner’s ready!

Did you hear me? I said, “Dinner is ready!”

***

Good boy, Frankie! Will you please go back and get Grandpa for dinner?

Oh good, you’re here! Let’s give thanks for the food.

I said, “Would you please give thanks for the food?”

No, I wasn’t mumbling. I asked you in my usual voice!

I’m NOT shouting at you. I’m speaking clearly so you can hear me.

Frankie, your dinner is ready …

I did not call you Cranky, and I know you can see yours on the table – I was talking to the dog!

***

How do you like it? It’s a new recipe.

I said it’s a new recipe! We haven’t had it before ….

Using up the left-overs scraps? Of course not!

No, it’s not one of my inventions. It’s a proper recipe.

Very sweet? Well, it has maple syrup over the bacon, and there’s a honey butter sauce over the chicken …

Of course it’s a main meal! I’ve never offered you chicken and bacon for dessert, have I?

I’m not irritable tonight! If you would just wear your hearing aids ….

And I will keep on saying it till you start wearing them. You paid a lot for them.

There is NO background noise to be magnified. It’s just you and me, and Frankie! The house is quiet.

That’s not very nice! I am trying to speak up so you can hear me!

***

It’s good to try different cuisines at times…. We don’t want to have boring meals, do we?

Well, I suppose it IS nice that you like ordinary food. But there’s nothing wrong with a little change every so often, is there?

I said, we are having a little change tonight. We are trying something different. I said, something different! I am NOT shouting at you, so stop saying that ….

Anyway, it’s not that unusual … the recipe is an American one, from John. He’s a wonderful cook. He shares his recipes on FanStory sometimes.

FanStory! It IS a writing site. Most of it is creative writing. And he does write creatively … about FOOD!

Well, no! No, he is NOT trying to promote a new recipe book. He just loves cooking and writing about his food creations. I thought you might like something different ….

Okay, we can have that tomorrow evening. But I’m not as good at it as your mother was!

Of course, no one can match your mother! What I said was, it would be nice if YOU made dinner for us occasionally, like John does.

Yes, but then it’s only a toasted sandwich, or scrambled eggs. I meant a proper meal, a fine dining experience.

Yes, even two people can have a fine dining experience at home. John does. Anyway, John suggests music and fine wines to accompany his dishes – it sets the atmosphere for a relaxed evening meal.

No, I didn’t put any music on. Because you can’t hear music when I put it on. You need it up so loud the whole street can hear it!

No, I DON’T want it that loud. That does NOT set a pleasurable ambiance. Okay, we’ll just continue to eat without any music. That way you will hear me when we are trying to converse ….

I said, “when we converse”! I sometimes wonder if you are choosing not to hear me.

Where am I going in the middle of the meal? John said to have wine …. I’m going to get a bottle of wine!

Because I didn’t put any wine out. I said I didn’t put any wine out. Why not? Because you don’t drink wine now. If I open a bottle, I will have to drink it all!

***

I only brought one glass because you don’t drink wine now! You always say it disagrees with you.

I did not say you are disagreeable. I said wine disagrees with you.

It’s for ME! I’m having a bottle of wine with my meal.

Yes, I certainly can! Just watch me! It will help me relax!