Your Pe*is

by Terry Broxson

The author has placed a warning on this post for language.

There needs to be a disclaimer, as this story is for men only.

Sorry, ladies, you'll have to read something else. No peeking. This is on the honor system, but I know I can trust you.

Men, as I cruised the internet news sites, I discovered a story I thought had been attributed to Men's Health Magazine. "Seven Things That Can Happen to Your Penis."

Now, that title grabbed me. Let me rephrase. It grabbed my attention. I felt it important to share with my fellow members.

My brain wondered, "What the heck were you thinking?"

I didn't read the story right away. But the following day, I did a Google search to find it again. Instead, I discovered you had been a busy boy.

I made the assumption you sold your story to a health magazine. Perhaps you viewed it as a public service. But my thinking changed when other stories started popping up.

* 8 things to know about your penis

* 10 fascinating things about your penis

* 15 facts about your penis

* 8 important facts about your penis

* 39 facts about your penis that will blow your mind

* 20 hard facts about your penis

* 5 facts about your penis

The last three articles all came from the United Kingdom. I have always been suspicious you might be a Brit. Not that there is anything wrong with that. But it surprised me as I thought you guys were pretty private about all this type of stuff.

I'm guessing they paid you a lot of money to come up with these facts and observations. I do admire how you created a package of stories ranging from as few as five things all the way up to thirty-nine. Way to Go!

I also admit I thought it smart not to provide pictures. With pictures, you just have no control, if you know what I mean. Someone might have recognized you.

One thing about a writing site is that no one needs a picture to recognize you. We can do it through your writing. So, it's easy to know who you are, but I won't blow your cover.

But beware, others may find the same stories I did. If they do I hope you are not exposed.

Some will think you are a hero to put out the truth as you feel it to be.

Rest assured. I will be standing behind you—way far behind you. Oh, and I canceled my subscription to Men's Health.

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Story of the Month contest entry