General Fiction posted January 24, 2022 |
Irony is bliss
Don't be such a Crab
by John Ciarmello
Pop goes the Weasel Contest Winner
"This ocean water is freezing. Hm, and what type of ocean fish are you supposed to be?"
"Well, an Imitation crab, of course. What type of ocean fish are you supposed to be?"
"Well, a real crab, of course."
"You act very smug for a real crab. Aren't you afraid of getting caught and eaten?"
"As you should be, my imitation crab friend."
"I'm not worried."
"Oh?"
"Do you ever recall anyone catching an imitation crab?"
"Well - "
"Exactly!"
#
"Ah, beautiful restaurant by the sea. What a wonderful choice, dear."
"Thank you, my love. I knew you'd approve."
"What're you going to have, dear?"
"Well, the crab, of course!"
"You?"
"I'm going to have the imitation crab salad."
"Ah yes, I forgot you're allergic to shellfish."
"This ocean water is freezing. Hm, and what type of ocean fish are you supposed to be?"
"Well, an Imitation crab, of course. What type of ocean fish are you supposed to be?"
"Well, a real crab, of course."
"You act very smug for a real crab. Aren't you afraid of getting caught and eaten?"
"As you should be, my imitation crab friend."
"I'm not worried."
"Oh?"
"Do you ever recall anyone catching an imitation crab?"
"Well - "
"Exactly!"
#
"Ah, beautiful restaurant by the sea. What a wonderful choice, dear."
"Thank you, my love. I knew you'd approve."
"What're you going to have, dear?"
"Well, the crab, of course!"
"You?"
"I'm going to have the imitation crab salad."
"Ah yes, I forgot you're allergic to shellfish."
"Well, an Imitation crab, of course. What type of ocean fish are you supposed to be?"
"Well, a real crab, of course."
"You act very smug for a real crab. Aren't you afraid of getting caught and eaten?"
"As you should be, my imitation crab friend."
"I'm not worried."
"Oh?"
"Do you ever recall anyone catching an imitation crab?"
"Well - "
"Exactly!"
#
"Ah, beautiful restaurant by the sea. What a wonderful choice, dear."
"Thank you, my love. I knew you'd approve."
"What're you going to have, dear?"
"Well, the crab, of course!"
"You?"
"I'm going to have the imitation crab salad."
"Ah yes, I forgot you're allergic to shellfish."
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