Egg and spoon race seem too tough? I'll tell you what to do;
Just get real smart,
Before you start,
To your spoon add some glue!

You'd like to try the marathon, I'm sure you will do well;
Just ride a horse
For half the course,
The judges just won't tell.

Anyone for tennis? You'll win your game I bet.
When it's your call
To hit the ball,
We'll just take down the net.

High jump's looking difficult, the distance rather far,
Smart shoes with springs
Will grant you wings,
You'll sail across the bar.

At chess you'll have no trouble, put your rivals to the sword;
You won't be weak
If you can sneak
Three queens onto the board!

A baking contest could be fun, and if your cake's a flop,
Don't shout and curse,
Take out your purse
And buy one from the shop.

Your giant pumpkin wins the prize, there's no 'I beg your pardon;'
But could we know
If it did grow
In someone else's garden?

Winning's easy, don't you know; we cannot hold a grudge.
We're all such fools
To follow rules
When no one acts as judge!