HOL I must first say
Is just a simple TLA
If that means SFA to you
Please look it up on the FAQ

FYI it's History
Of Lecterns; you will plainly see
That lecterns had a role to play
In great events of the USA

The Great Depression's squeaky wheel
Was oiled by FDR's New Deal
His trusty lectern, strong and good,
Supported his plan (he knew it would).

J. Edgar Hoover FBI
Thought gangsters all deserved to fry.
His lectern held a lengthy list
Of 'enemies' who'd not be missed.

In West Berlin did JFK
Defy the Soviet might one day.
His lectern (and I swear it's true)
Said "Ich bin ein Berliner, too."

MLK with sermons loud
Could stir the passions of a crowd.
The lectern in his back-up team
Was heard to say, "WE have a dream."

When LBJ went all the way
His speech upon a lectern lay.
"Are we going to Vietnam?"
The lectern muttered, "Yes I am!"

When IBM or KFC
Reveal their profits, you will see
A lectern won't be far away;
It's part of corporate DNA

Your classic lectern's AOK
Its wood's approved by FDA
But many a modern VIP
Prefers one made of PVC

If you've a lectern, treat it nice;
With TLC is my advice.
A lectern's death is cruel to see;
How tragic "Lectern RIP"

"WTF," I hear you cry.
"This poet needs an MRI."
No, I'm not high on LSD
I even aced my SAT

In fact at midnight GMT
I shall receive my PhD
My thesis on the HOL
Is OTT, but what the hell?!

They'll show it all on CNN
And ABC at half past ten.
On the stage there's sure to be
A lectern and that's QED.

(OMG the things we do!
PVH this one's for you!)