Noellica: Sometimes I sit alone, and as I sit by myself, I begin to ponder. I continue to think in this manner until I am eventually forced to stop in order to preserve the thin shred of sanity I have left. For what should happen otherwise? Should I then face my worst fear and die the same death of madness as Einstein? Should I be faced with the horrid failure of never being able to overcome my disease? Dear God above: I am but a child! Why have I been cursed so that I should forever face this pain and never belong? And why is it that I might never find happiness? I am not even a woman yet and all I know is sadness and lost hope! Woe, I can not ever please you, the other children of Adam and Eve, or even my own self. I may not live it is to heavy a burden. But I cannot yet die for I have accomplished but naught.