Caught In A Storm
Danger at sea for a trading vessel13 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This monorhyme, Caught in a Storm, has the common rhyming end words and takes the reader through the bumpy and salt-sprayed tumult to hopefully survive and do it again.
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2020
This monorhyme, Caught in a Storm, has the common rhyming end words and takes the reader through the bumpy and salt-sprayed tumult to hopefully survive and do it again.
Comment Written 04-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2020
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Thanks Bill.
Comment from poetwatch
Just before I die I'd like my wife's apple pie. Filled with sweetness for the eye, slices of heaven from the sky. :) Thank you, author, for the taste of flavor in your poem. This is a good entry for the Monorhyme contest. Thank you. Can I have another slice?
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2020
Just before I die I'd like my wife's apple pie. Filled with sweetness for the eye, slices of heaven from the sky. :) Thank you, author, for the taste of flavor in your poem. This is a good entry for the Monorhyme contest. Thank you. Can I have another slice?
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2020
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Thanks for reviewing. You can have my slice of apple pie - i prefer peach.
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is a wonderful poem entry for the Monorhyme writing prompt. I enjoyed reading it, and I do hope it does well in the contest. Good luck!
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2020
This is a wonderful poem entry for the Monorhyme writing prompt. I enjoyed reading it, and I do hope it does well in the contest. Good luck!
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2020
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Thanks for reviewing. (The poem came equal 2nd.)
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You're very welcome. Yea! Congratulations!
Comment from dragonpoet
Wow, this is a long poem for a monorhyme. I like the story of how weather is effecting both man and nature. Also, I like the bit of relgious truth you put in.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
dp
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2020
Wow, this is a long poem for a monorhyme. I like the story of how weather is effecting both man and nature. Also, I like the bit of relgious truth you put in.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
dp
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2020
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Thanks for your review! (sorry for late reply)
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You're welcome and no apologies necessary.
Joan
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A wonderful application for this unique form of rhyme... great testimony and awesome tale all rolled into one! ;) Beautifully done! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck at the polls! ;)
A wonderful application for this unique form of rhyme... great testimony and awesome tale all rolled into one! ;) Beautifully done! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck at the polls! ;)
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
Comment from Alchera
I do like this monorhymed ballad form structural poem which takes me back to several different literary readings and above all to The Ballad of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge on one hand while on the other it's exactly the opposite for its stillness and sense of supernatural atmosphere.
The flow is very good and takes You straight down to the end point without problems of comprehension. What I personally don't like after such a perfectly beautiful written ballad are the two last words "apple pie" which ruins everything.
The selected picture is really dramatic and in God's hands as the cree and the shopping is fighting against the tremendous storm. Great descriptive work!
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2020
I do like this monorhymed ballad form structural poem which takes me back to several different literary readings and above all to The Ballad of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge on one hand while on the other it's exactly the opposite for its stillness and sense of supernatural atmosphere.
The flow is very good and takes You straight down to the end point without problems of comprehension. What I personally don't like after such a perfectly beautiful written ballad are the two last words "apple pie" which ruins everything.
The selected picture is really dramatic and in God's hands as the cree and the shopping is fighting against the tremendous storm. Great descriptive work!
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2020
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Haha... I thought some reviewers would comment on the apple pie ending. I admit it is unexpected. As I am in charge of my own poem, putting in "apple pie" completely changes the tone of the poem. I did it to lighten the sombre mood, and I was feeling hungry at the time. My sense of humour got the better of me. It amused me to think that Arab sailors might enjoy a slice of pie if they survived the storm. (In modern times, there is a very strong American presence in the United Arab Emirates, and Dubai is very cosmopolitan, so apple pie may well be easily available.)
Comment from zanya
It's a superb poetic achievement in Monorhyme telling a seafaring tale of sailors carrying precious cargo buffeted by stormy weather = a delightful read
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2020
It's a superb poetic achievement in Monorhyme telling a seafaring tale of sailors carrying precious cargo buffeted by stormy weather = a delightful read
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2020
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Thank you for your praise of my poem with this high rating. Much appreciated!
Comment from mermaids
This is an excellent poem that fits the picture perfectly. When I read your words, I feel like I am on this ship. I can see the seagulls flying and feel the boat tossing and turning. Love your last word, apple pie, it gives a positive ending and a feel of hope. I am in awe of your rhyming words, they are so smooth and add to the picture you are creating.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2020
This is an excellent poem that fits the picture perfectly. When I read your words, I feel like I am on this ship. I can see the seagulls flying and feel the boat tossing and turning. Love your last word, apple pie, it gives a positive ending and a feel of hope. I am in awe of your rhyming words, they are so smooth and add to the picture you are creating.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2020
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Thanks for your appreciative response to my poem, especially your mention of apple pie. Another reviewer criticized the ending. It was meant to be somewhat unexpected. As I am in charge of my own poem, putting in "apple pie" completely changes the tone of the poem. I did it to lighten the sombre mood, and I was feeling hungry at the time. It amused me to think that Arab sailors might enjoy a slice of pie if they survived the storm. (In modern times, there is a very strong American presence in the United Arab Emirates, and Dubai is very cosmopolitan, so apple pie may well be easily available.)
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about a ship at sea in big trouble with very little hope of help from anyone that may be close by on a vast ocean the chances are very slim.
A very well-written poem about a ship at sea in big trouble with very little hope of help from anyone that may be close by on a vast ocean the chances are very slim.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
You have told a nice story of faith in God, how God's grace we get, God is the protector; the taletelling is in a perfect and enjoyable monochrome; well said, well done, thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
You have told a nice story of faith in God, how God's grace we get, God is the protector; the taletelling is in a perfect and enjoyable monochrome; well said, well done, thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 02-Sep-2020