The French Letter
Viewing comments for Chapter 89 "The Graveyard Nightjar"A Novel
24 total reviews
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Great chapter Tony with Helen's thoughts about what it will mean to her if she does kill Zemar. Your words bring out her hatred and passion and that nothing will stop her from this mission.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2019
  |
Great chapter Tony with Helen's thoughts about what it will mean to her if she does kill Zemar. Your words bring out her hatred and passion and that nothing will stop her from this mission.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 23-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2019
-
It's very good of you to review these earlier chapters that are no longer on listing. I'm glad that Helen's feelings came across strongly for you.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
flock wallpaper (flocked?)
This is very well written, Tony. It is interesting and easy to read and follow. Your characters seem very real. Excellent work, my friend~Debbie
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
 |
flock wallpaper (flocked?)
This is very well written, Tony. It is interesting and easy to read and follow. Your characters seem very real. Excellent work, my friend~Debbie
Comment Written 19-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
-
Thanks, Debbie, for your supportive comments and the sixth star. Appreciated.
Thanks, too, for putting me right about ?flocked?.
All good wishes, Tony.
Comment from Gail Denham
So they were also lovers - well, the plot thickens enormously with the thought to kill one of the bad guys. Well done in this chapter - it's clear and moves the story along very well.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
|
So they were also lovers - well, the plot thickens enormously with the thought to kill one of the bad guys. Well done in this chapter - it's clear and moves the story along very well.
Comment Written 19-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
-
Thanks, Gail. Appreciated. All good wishes, Tony.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was a really excellent chapter, Tony. I think I would be like Helen and want to kill the person who killed my parents. I'd have no guilt feelings about doing it either. There is a limit to how much we will take and Zemar stepped over that limit. Tony now realises there is nothing he can do to stop her and cares so much for her that he is sort of willing to throw his life in with hers. Well done, this was an emotion-packed part and ended the only way it could. I'm off on holiday on Friday, Tony, we are cruising to Barbados, so I'm not sure if I'll get a signal while at sea. If I can't, I'll catch up when we come home. Unless you have another part ready for before Friday? :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
|
That was a really excellent chapter, Tony. I think I would be like Helen and want to kill the person who killed my parents. I'd have no guilt feelings about doing it either. There is a limit to how much we will take and Zemar stepped over that limit. Tony now realises there is nothing he can do to stop her and cares so much for her that he is sort of willing to throw his life in with hers. Well done, this was an emotion-packed part and ended the only way it could. I'm off on holiday on Friday, Tony, we are cruising to Barbados, so I'm not sure if I'll get a signal while at sea. If I can't, I'll catch up when we come home. Unless you have another part ready for before Friday? :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 19-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
-
Thanks very much for these affirming comments, Helen. I?m back in Brisbane and not sure how much time I can snatch for writing over the next week. However, I may manage another chapter.
Have a wonderful time in the West Indies. Very envious!
My father spent quite a bit of time in Barbados just after the war, but I?ve never been there.
Comment from Pam (respa)
-This is another excellent chapter,
Tony, deserving of a six, but there
aren't enough to go around.
-Some interesting developments
with the opening sequence of
the fencing references that got
on Charles's nerves, as a symbol
of how he and Helen were skirting
around the main issue-trust.
-Charles has been dealing with
that for some time, and it seems
that Helen finally decided to tell
him the real reason for her hatred of Zemar.
-Before that, however, there was a bit
of banter about Ash, and how he
was clever enough to find the
listening device so no details were revealed.
-You capture the emotion of Helen
very well as she relates her real
reason for agreeing to Jeanne's plan.
-Charles, obviously, thinks enough of
her to risk his life to try and help her.
-It would seem that he is more
comfortable with his feelings
for Helen at the end of this chapter.
-I get the feeling things will be
heating up very soon!
-Well done, my friend.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
|
-This is another excellent chapter,
Tony, deserving of a six, but there
aren't enough to go around.
-Some interesting developments
with the opening sequence of
the fencing references that got
on Charles's nerves, as a symbol
of how he and Helen were skirting
around the main issue-trust.
-Charles has been dealing with
that for some time, and it seems
that Helen finally decided to tell
him the real reason for her hatred of Zemar.
-Before that, however, there was a bit
of banter about Ash, and how he
was clever enough to find the
listening device so no details were revealed.
-You capture the emotion of Helen
very well as she relates her real
reason for agreeing to Jeanne's plan.
-Charles, obviously, thinks enough of
her to risk his life to try and help her.
-It would seem that he is more
comfortable with his feelings
for Helen at the end of this chapter.
-I get the feeling things will be
heating up very soon!
-Well done, my friend.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
-
Thanks very much for these affirming summary comments. I?m back in Brisbane and not sure how much time I can snatch for writing over the next week.
-
You are very welcome, Tony. Hope things are going better.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written chapter. It seems the revelations and secrets are endless and another secret is revealed and the mussion gets more dangerous by the minute.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2019
|
A very well-written chapter. It seems the revelations and secrets are endless and another secret is revealed and the mussion gets more dangerous by the minute.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2019
-
Thanks for your review, Sandra. As always, appreciated. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from AvL
What a pleasure it is for me to be reviewing a text by tfawcus again ... and in this case, prose! I find it refreshing to read a well-written, properly-punctuated, and logically-paragraphed text whose spelling, diction, grammar, and syntax are all error-free, and all cohere and work together to propel a very intriguing plot. No offense to my fellow fan-storians, but such sterling attributes are extremely rare anywhere, and especially here on F-S. tfawcus should be, and, as far as I can determine, is, a professional novelist. Extremely well-done.
Two very small quibbles/questions remain for me: 1.) Would the character Rasheed, the Sikh taxi-driver, have been attracted to Islam so as to have become radicalized by ISIS? Possibly, although the Sikhs, who are "modified Hindus," as I understand their religion, are a far cry from Moslems. Of course, I am really nit-picking on this point.
2.) What attracted me to this chunk of text in the first place was the titular reference to, and photograph of, that bird, the nightjar, who is a very special critter to me: a totem-animal, of sorts. Here in the states, we know these city-dwellers variously as bull-bats, or as nightjars; but most commonly, we call them nighthawks. (Of course, they are unrelated to hawks and other raptors, and are actually members of the goatsucker avian clan.) In any case, I was surprised to hear the narrator identify the cry of the nightjar as "chonk! chonk! chonk!" To my finely- tuned rabbit-ears, the sound of this bird's cry is more like "Peeent! Peeent!" (I have been watching/listening to these birds for decades, by the way; and I have even "immortalized" them in my crappy verse.)
In any case, as usual, I have blah-blah-blathered on far too long. Many thanks again, tfawcus, for one truly exceptional chapter. "Chonk!"
P.S.
The author's linkage of the nightjar's "chonk! chonk" to the rhythmic headbanging (against their bed's headboard) by two impassioned lovers is as ribald as it is risible, in the good sense of that term. Very nice!
AvL
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2019
|
What a pleasure it is for me to be reviewing a text by tfawcus again ... and in this case, prose! I find it refreshing to read a well-written, properly-punctuated, and logically-paragraphed text whose spelling, diction, grammar, and syntax are all error-free, and all cohere and work together to propel a very intriguing plot. No offense to my fellow fan-storians, but such sterling attributes are extremely rare anywhere, and especially here on F-S. tfawcus should be, and, as far as I can determine, is, a professional novelist. Extremely well-done.
Two very small quibbles/questions remain for me: 1.) Would the character Rasheed, the Sikh taxi-driver, have been attracted to Islam so as to have become radicalized by ISIS? Possibly, although the Sikhs, who are "modified Hindus," as I understand their religion, are a far cry from Moslems. Of course, I am really nit-picking on this point.
2.) What attracted me to this chunk of text in the first place was the titular reference to, and photograph of, that bird, the nightjar, who is a very special critter to me: a totem-animal, of sorts. Here in the states, we know these city-dwellers variously as bull-bats, or as nightjars; but most commonly, we call them nighthawks. (Of course, they are unrelated to hawks and other raptors, and are actually members of the goatsucker avian clan.) In any case, I was surprised to hear the narrator identify the cry of the nightjar as "chonk! chonk! chonk!" To my finely- tuned rabbit-ears, the sound of this bird's cry is more like "Peeent! Peeent!" (I have been watching/listening to these birds for decades, by the way; and I have even "immortalized" them in my crappy verse.)
In any case, as usual, I have blah-blah-blathered on far too long. Many thanks again, tfawcus, for one truly exceptional chapter. "Chonk!"
P.S.
The author's linkage of the nightjar's "chonk! chonk" to the rhythmic headbanging (against their bed's headboard) by two impassioned lovers is as ribald as it is risible, in the good sense of that term. Very nice!
AvL
Comment Written 17-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2019
-
I'm delighted that you found it worthwhile to read this chapter and to respond so fully. You have identified a serious flaw which I have noted. I need to rewrite Rasheed in a more culturally believable format. Off with his turban! Back to the drawing board!
I don't know your nationality or residence, but I think your remark about the nightjar's call possibly refer to the European Nightjar. The species endemic to south-east Asia and having a distribution that includes the Indian subcontinent is the Large-Tailed Nightjar. Their call is somewhat different. However, I'm willing to take further advice on this. "Peeent, Peeent" would work almost as well in the narrative.
It is most refreshing to receive an intelligent review here that goes a beyond line editing. Thank you very much both for that and for the sixth star.
Al good wishes, Tony
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Once again, you did a wonderful job writing this post. You did a good job building up to the next post and I can't wait to see what happens next. This is a good story. Thank you for posting.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2019
|
Once again, you did a wonderful job writing this post. You did a good job building up to the next post and I can't wait to see what happens next. This is a good story. Thank you for posting.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2019
-
Thanks, Barbara. I very much appreciate your continued encouragement. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from royowen
So the truth is out, in response to Charles' pointed question of what Helen was up to, he receives an emphatic answer, so knowing how her parents were killed, she quite definitely wants revenge for the murder of her parents and the addiction of her sister, pretty sound reasons for motive. Well done Tony, good scribing, blessings my friends Roy
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2019
|
So the truth is out, in response to Charles' pointed question of what Helen was up to, he receives an emphatic answer, so knowing how her parents were killed, she quite definitely wants revenge for the murder of her parents and the addiction of her sister, pretty sound reasons for motive. Well done Tony, good scribing, blessings my friends Roy
Comment Written 16-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2019
-
Thanks, Roy. I very much appreciate your continued encouragement. All good wishes, Tony
-
Most welcome Tony
Comment from Ulla
Oh, this is good writing, Tony. I loved it. It is also so very bittersweet as I see it. Where is it all going to end? A superb chapter and the story is alive as ever. I'm enjoying it. All best. Ulla:))
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2019
|
Oh, this is good writing, Tony. I loved it. It is also so very bittersweet as I see it. Where is it all going to end? A superb chapter and the story is alive as ever. I'm enjoying it. All best. Ulla:))
Comment Written 16-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2019
-
Thanks, Ulla. I very much appreciate your continued encouragement. All good wishes, Tony
