Body of a Horse, Heart of a Man
Viewing comments for Prologue "Mount Olympus"A modern twist on Greek Mythology.
17 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
I love the Greek myths and you've done a great job with this tale. It has so many ways it could lead, especially with all the jealousy that is typically found at Olympus. I am sure there are some interesting times ahead for Eudora and anyone connected with her.
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2019
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I love the Greek myths and you've done a great job with this tale. It has so many ways it could lead, especially with all the jealousy that is typically found at Olympus. I am sure there are some interesting times ahead for Eudora and anyone connected with her.
Comment Written 04-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2019
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Thank you for the great review!! I?m about to take a lot of liberties with the old myths, lol, but all?s fair game in fantasy.
Thanks again,
Rhonda
Comment from Bill Pinder
Great job with this chapter in a story about the gods. Sounds like it is in the process of becoming an excellent book. Thanks for sharing your creativity!
Bill
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2019
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Great job with this chapter in a story about the gods. Sounds like it is in the process of becoming an excellent book. Thanks for sharing your creativity!
Bill
Comment Written 04-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2019
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Thank you, Bill. The book is taking its first feeble steps. Wish me luck,
Rhonda
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Nice book cover, Rhonda,
and thanks for the notes.
-Good to see your story, too!
-The story flows well with effective
description and examples of how
things are going on Mt. Olympus.
-You personalize Hera and Zeus
by showing them as concerned parents.
-Of course, nothing ever stays the
same-Eudora is growing up and the
gods are facing more challenges
with the growth in humanity.
-The ending is good as you leave us with
Zeus and his anxiety over Phoebus.
-Good luck with the book!
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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-Nice book cover, Rhonda,
and thanks for the notes.
-Good to see your story, too!
-The story flows well with effective
description and examples of how
things are going on Mt. Olympus.
-You personalize Hera and Zeus
by showing them as concerned parents.
-Of course, nothing ever stays the
same-Eudora is growing up and the
gods are facing more challenges
with the growth in humanity.
-The ending is good as you leave us with
Zeus and his anxiety over Phoebus.
-Good luck with the book!
Comment Written 02-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Thank you for the six stars and the detailed review. Both are appreciated. I know you will always be open and honest on what you think and that is so very helpful.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Hi Rhonda, got in from the start this time. I love this beginning chapter, it's a subject that I enjoy reading as well. I am not a good reviewer when it comes to edits, ask anyone!!! lol. But, I do know what I enjoy, and I enjoyed this. Well done, I'll be looking for the next part. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Hi Rhonda, got in from the start this time. I love this beginning chapter, it's a subject that I enjoy reading as well. I am not a good reviewer when it comes to edits, ask anyone!!! lol. But, I do know what I enjoy, and I enjoyed this. Well done, I'll be looking for the next part. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 02-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Hi Sandra. I?m so very glad to have your support. I?m not much of an editor either, so I usually do what you did and tell my feelings.
Thanks again,
Rhonda
Comment from forestport12
Very insightful. Much of this I did not know or understand. To me I think of Paul and how he challenged the Greeks, and how would take their beliefs and show them how they are close but very far, and they needed to open their hearts. Looking forward to learning more. Good job.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Very insightful. Much of this I did not know or understand. To me I think of Paul and how he challenged the Greeks, and how would take their beliefs and show them how they are close but very far, and they needed to open their hearts. Looking forward to learning more. Good job.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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I?ll be honest with you, I have taken great liberties with Greek Mythology here. I?m just using their characters to play out a more human story. Thanks for suspending disbelief for this fantasy tale!
Rhonda
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed reading this. I raised four boys. Three of my boys have children and each one has one daughter. It's amazing my granddaughters have these big tough daddy's wrapped in their little fingers. LOL Poor Zeus.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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I enjoyed reading this. I raised four boys. Three of my boys have children and each one has one daughter. It's amazing my granddaughters have these big tough daddy's wrapped in their little fingers. LOL Poor Zeus.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Oh yeah, daughters play daddy?s like a proverbial harp!
Thanks for the read and review.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from royowen
This is a bit different from the previous stories I've read from you, in fact from anyone apart from Homer or Aesop, although he may not have written about the gods. A marvellous start dear Rhonda. The Greek gods were more human than humans. A fabulous story Rhonda, looking forward to more. Blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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This is a bit different from the previous stories I've read from you, in fact from anyone apart from Homer or Aesop, although he may not have written about the gods. A marvellous start dear Rhonda. The Greek gods were more human than humans. A fabulous story Rhonda, looking forward to more. Blessings, Roy
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Thank you for the beautiful review Roy. This book takes a lot of liberties with Greek mythology, but in the end, there is a message within the story. My target audience is young adults and I try to take modern problems and put them in a different context to make a point.
Thanks for reviewing and for the awesome 6 stars!
Take care,
Rhonda
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Well done Rhonda
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed your story, Rhonda. It flowed well with good imagery and details. I like the cover. I remained interested from start to finish. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes with your on-going publishing venture. Respectfully with Love, Jan.
Near the end, I would not end a sentence with the word 'was'.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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I enjoyed your story, Rhonda. It flowed well with good imagery and details. I like the cover. I remained interested from start to finish. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes with your on-going publishing venture. Respectfully with Love, Jan.
Near the end, I would not end a sentence with the word 'was'.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Thank you Sweet Jan. I so appreciate your comments and support. I haven?t ventured out in novels for awhile, so cross your fingers for me.
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Ulla
Hi Rhonda, this is a great start to your book. I understand that you want to re-write it and I'm looking forward to reading it in full. As I said, it's a great start. I've always been fascinated with the Greek mythology. All best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Hi Rhonda, this is a great start to your book. I understand that you want to re-write it and I'm looking forward to reading it in full. As I said, it's a great start. I've always been fascinated with the Greek mythology. All best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Thank you for the wonderful and supportive review, Ulla. I?m glad you took time to stop by and read.
Rhonda
Comment from rspoet
Hello Rhonda,
A wonderful beginning for what looks to be an intriguing novel.
You have introduced the characters, set the scene and the possible conflict
very well.
a few optional suggestions to consider:
"Her heart swelled with such pride as she'd seldom previously experienced."
1. Her heart swelled with pride. or
2. Her heart swelled with a pride she'd seldom experienced.
"The goddess queen had been forced to share her older children moments after they left the womb. These children [had] became powerful gods..."
The use of 'had' can be tricky. It usually references an earlier event. The earliest event is the first one. You could simply drop the second had or replace with "soon" or "later."
It's all the author's preference.
I usually check for unnecessary uses of 'had.' It is so easy to put them in there. :)
"In fact, it was his desire that nothing ever [even] upset her." drop [even]?
A great chapter that draws the reader into the story.
Looking forward to chapter two!
Well done
Robert
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Hello Rhonda,
A wonderful beginning for what looks to be an intriguing novel.
You have introduced the characters, set the scene and the possible conflict
very well.
a few optional suggestions to consider:
"Her heart swelled with such pride as she'd seldom previously experienced."
1. Her heart swelled with pride. or
2. Her heart swelled with a pride she'd seldom experienced.
"The goddess queen had been forced to share her older children moments after they left the womb. These children [had] became powerful gods..."
The use of 'had' can be tricky. It usually references an earlier event. The earliest event is the first one. You could simply drop the second had or replace with "soon" or "later."
It's all the author's preference.
I usually check for unnecessary uses of 'had.' It is so easy to put them in there. :)
"In fact, it was his desire that nothing ever [even] upset her." drop [even]?
A great chapter that draws the reader into the story.
Looking forward to chapter two!
Well done
Robert
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Thank you for the brilliant six stars, my friend. You are so right on the suggestions. See what happens when you take two years off? You get rusty.
Thank you so much,
Rhonda
