Reviews from

Eric's Epic Adventures

Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Herbie, What Do I Do?"
Another adventure for Eric

32 total reviews 
Comment from alexisleech
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love the way you include things like 'Annie had recovered from the shock quicker than Thomas and was now giving him a look that Eric recognised from the ones his mum gave his dad sometimes.' Don't we all remember that look - I certainly do!
Another super chapter, Sandra, and one that makes me eager to read on.

Alexis xxx

 Comment Written 26-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
    Thank you so very much, Alexis! What a lovely review and six stars as well! I'm just sorry it's not paying now. That was so good of you to read and review like that. Thank you big time!! Big hugs my wonderful friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from tfawcus
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Another wonderful chapter. The dialogue is spot on and it's easy to imagine the different emotional responses of Eric, the husband, and the wife. This is turning into a rip roaring yarn!

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 25-Jul-2019
    Thank you, Tony! I hope so, because Eric keeps asking me how far I've got ... no pressure! lol. Thank you, my friend, for really giving me a good start to the day with this lovely review and the wonderful 6 stars!. :) xxx Sandra
Comment from Winslow
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Sandra,

Interesting plot line. You drew me in to this chapter. I am sure Eric will be able to rescue Ellie with Herbie and Gizmo helping out. You have a written your story so Eric, Herbie, and Gizmo can have many adventures in different places and time. Well done.

Cheers,

Winslow

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 25-Jul-2019
    Thank you so much, Winslow, for this lovely review. Yes, there will be lots of adventures, this is the second one, Ancient Egypt with be the third story. Such fun! :)) Sandra x
Comment from the13thpoet
Excellent
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Good Afternoon Sandra. I enjoyed reading your story, that was a good continuation. The story kept me engaged and entertained. I can't wait to see what happens in this adventure. Good job.

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    Thank you so much for your lovely review, 13thpoet, I'm delighted you are enjoying my story. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Pam (respa)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

-Very nice image and an excellent chapter, Sandra.
-Effective dialect and suspense.
-I can see why Thomas would be skeptical
since his daughter is involved, and Eric
and Herbie look very strange to him.
-Annie is more willing to listen because she
wants her daughter back, too, but doesn't think
a young lad is going to be a problem.
-Eric reaches out to her, as well,
by asking about her wound.
-I like how Eric holds his own ground, and
tells Thomas what he thinks; he doesn't
like his words being twisted around.
-A good idea to have Herbie explain a little
about himself because that would be
difficult to understand and accept.
-He also gives encouragement
to Eric to continue trying to help.
-Finally, Thomas agrees, and it
is also good that he is going, too.
-A good ending, bringing in
the reference to the Wise One
and the anticipation of adventure!



 Comment Written 24-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part, Pam, your lovely review has put a big smile on my face. I wanted to explain a bit more about Herbie without it coming across as an explanation for the readers. Now Eric is going to find out if the Wise One was telling Eric the truth! I think he was. ;)) Thank you, dear friend, for the six stars, as always you are so kind. I was getting ready to reply to your review earlier this evening when Graham decided he needed his hair cutting. I do it for him because he hates going to the hairdressers/barbers. So, here I am, late! Biggest hugs my friend. :)) Sandra xx
reply by Pam (respa) on 24-Jul-2019
    You are very welcome and deserving of the stars and review, Sandra. You did a good job with Herbie-just enough explanation. I think the Wise One is right, too. A little different from the Powers, sometimes:)
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Well Howdy Sandra,
You sound just like one a them ole western writers.
Thomas and Annie are right fine homesteaders.
Now there's gonna be some complainers about stereotyping
the natives, but this here's one a them period pieces.
By crikey, time travelers in the ole west, what a great idea.
An Ellie May, that's a name right outta the Beverly Hillbillies,
though you may not of heard about them in England.
Anyway, this all adds up to six stars.
Can't wait to meet the "Injuns."
Robert



 Comment Written 24-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    LOL!! That's so funny! You are the second one who has mentioned the Beverly Hillbillies, we did have it here, and my 11-year-old granddaughter share's her name! Lol, she is Eric's cousin and is always bossing him around. He, like the softy he is, lets her! So, this will set the cat amongst the pigeons when she reads it. I think I'll get a good piece of tongue pie from her. She's a sweetie too, so I'm sure I'll be able to buy her over somehow.
    I've had one lady say I was stereotyping the Indians, but I told her she should wait and see where the story goes. Thank you so much for this lovely, funny review, my friend, and for all the golden stars! They sure do look fine up there! (my cowboy lingo isn't quite as good as yours!) Big hugs, :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from JudyE
Excellent
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I feel really involved with this story. You're very talented. :)

Just a couple of points:

Eric hadn't thought about that. What could he say? He'll most likely shoot me if I tell him I'm from the future! - are his thoughts meant to be in italics? I don't really know but it seems that thoughts often are in italics in other stories on here.

'Eric got onto his bike and grabbed his helmet and protective goggles from the handlebars where he'd hung them ready to put them on.' - I might have written this as 'Grabbing his helmet and protective goggles from the handlebars where he'd hung them, Eric got onto his bike.

"I found Herbie after he crashed. What he said was true. We can get Ellie May back. If I thought I'd be in danger, I wouldn't be that brave. But Herbie, that's his name, he won't let anyone hurt me. If you fired that gun, it wouldn't touch me." I hope! I've never faced a gun before. - Is the end of this paragraph meant to be part of Eric's conversation or just his thoughts. It's not really clear.

Cheers
Judy


 Comment Written 24-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    Hi Judy, thank you for another lovely review. The parts you mentioned are in italics, I always put thoughts down that way. Don't they show up on yours? I'll have to check this out, if they aren't clear enough, I'll try putting them in bold as well. I haven't had anyone else mention it, so it's a bit worrying. Thank you for pointing it out, though, there is obviously a problem here.
    I'm going to change that sentence around, too, you're right, it's better that way. Thanks again, and big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
reply by JudyE on 24-Jul-2019
    So sorry. It is showing up. I often copy the whole text into the comment box then start going through looking for spags. I'll need to remember that in future - to check back if I think italics are missing. I'm sorry I worried you with it. Cheers. Judy
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    That's ok, Judy, you just never know what happens once it's posted! lol. xxx
Comment from Brenda Henderson
Excellent
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Wow. Okay this took me back in memory to an old television series that I loved with Dean Stockwell and Scott Bacula called "Quantum Leap." With the appropriate adaptation this could easily spur a reboot of the series or a new parallel. Just a thought! Good work!

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    I remember that one, too. Hmm, wouldn't it be good to have this one made into a series? I'm going to be writing a few different adventures. But, I wouldn't have the first idea how to go about getting someone interested in doing something with them. :( Thank you so much, Barb, for your wonderful review, it really gave me a boost! Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
reply by Brenda Henderson on 24-Jul-2019
    You're very welcome!
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2019
    Hi Brenda, I just noticed I changed your name!! Sorry about that, I do have a tendency to do that at times, as my husband would tell you! lol. xxx
reply by Brenda Henderson on 24-Jul-2019
    It's okay. I figured that you fell victim to autocorrect!
Comment from Gail Denham
Excellent
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It sounds pretty good - there seems to be the right amount of hesitation on the part of the parents and also Eric as he doens't want to give Herbie away. It's a neat thing that you're doing this adventure story for your grandson - and I pray he can overcome his dyslexicia.

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 23-Jul-2019
    Thank you so much, Gail. I am enjoying writing this for my grandson, Eric. Thank you also for your kindness in praying he can win this battle. I'm sure he will, too. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from BeasPeas
Excellent
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A super chapter to your book, Sandra. Eric is a brave young man as he and Herbie set out on this adventure to help dad find Ellie May. Clearly written. Marilyn

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2019


reply by the author on 23-Jul-2019
    Thank you so much for this really nice review, Marilyn. Eric has a few hurdles to overcome, but I'm sure he'll do it. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx