Time After Time After Time After
The cliches of time as time marches on.29 total reviews
Comment from estory
I liked the use of alliteration here; the 't' sounds repeating created a tick tock sense of the passing of time throughout the poem, and that was nicely done. But I think many of the lines were a little too long and you lost sense of rhythm and the rhymes at the end got lost as well. Shorter, pentameter lines tighten up the rhythm and you get that rhyme punctuation at the end much better. that's why rarely do lines go beyond that 10 syllable count. estory
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I liked the use of alliteration here; the 't' sounds repeating created a tick tock sense of the passing of time throughout the poem, and that was nicely done. But I think many of the lines were a little too long and you lost sense of rhythm and the rhymes at the end got lost as well. Shorter, pentameter lines tighten up the rhythm and you get that rhyme punctuation at the end much better. that's why rarely do lines go beyond that 10 syllable count. estory
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
Comment from Heather Knight
This is a wonderful poem. I have enjoyed reading the many ways you used the word time.
However, I can't say I'm very fond of my countryman, Dali. He has always creeped me out.
Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest.
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This is a wonderful poem. I have enjoyed reading the many ways you used the word time.
However, I can't say I'm very fond of my countryman, Dali. He has always creeped me out.
Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
Comment from Habib Oke
Brilliant work. How romantic! I felt like copying the stanza which says "we chose each other over and over..." and sending it to my darling wife. And in fact the whole poem is worth sharing to a beloved one. Your poem is indeed recommendable. Great Job .
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Brilliant work. How romantic! I felt like copying the stanza which says "we chose each other over and over..." and sending it to my darling wife. And in fact the whole poem is worth sharing to a beloved one. Your poem is indeed recommendable. Great Job .
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
Comment from Mastery
"We chose each other "over and over" during the "course of time."
Each "tick" begat a "tock" to prove that "love begets love" -
While denying that our "timeless love" is but a paradigm."
Great entry for this contest, author. well done. Bob
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2019
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"We chose each other "over and over" during the "course of time."
Each "tick" begat a "tock" to prove that "love begets love" -
While denying that our "timeless love" is but a paradigm."
Great entry for this contest, author. well done. Bob
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2019
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Hi Bob,
Thank you for your support on this one. It?s been well received with twenty-nine 29) 5?Star Reviews and two awards: Recognized and an All the Best.
Sorry you aren?t so fond of my ?I Can...? poem. It?s ?off the wall? but still popular. It?s also had 29 5-star Reviews with both Recognized and All the Best awards.
- Sincerely ..... Lobber
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Good for you, Lobber. To each his own. : ) Bob
Comment from susand3022
Hello Author, this is a timely piece about time. ;) Really though, I like the way you worked in so many phrases about time and the way we use them. A good entry for the Time Poem Contest. :)
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Hello Author, this is a timely piece about time. ;) Really though, I like the way you worked in so many phrases about time and the way we use them. A good entry for the Time Poem Contest. :)
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
If we can have a loving partner throughout our life and they are by our side when we take our last breath, then we are lucky, as you say time waits for no man and love sometimes leaves us lonely, I wish you luck with the contest, love Dolly x
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If we can have a loving partner throughout our life and they are by our side when we take our last breath, then we are lucky, as you say time waits for no man and love sometimes leaves us lonely, I wish you luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
Comment from djsaxon
I am liking your port a great deal. This beautifully crafted. I don't know of any Fanstorian who would think to combine Virgil, Dali, and Cyndi Lauper. Great mindset. Subtle use of effective allit. Solid ABAB throughout. An outstanding write. Cheers - DJ
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I am liking your port a great deal. This beautifully crafted. I don't know of any Fanstorian who would think to combine Virgil, Dali, and Cyndi Lauper. Great mindset. Subtle use of effective allit. Solid ABAB throughout. An outstanding write. Cheers - DJ
Comment Written 12-Jun-2019
Comment from Dean Kuch
If I'm not mistaken, Time After Time was one of Cindy Lauper's biggest hits along with Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, right?
Regardless of that, this was a well written entry for the Time Poetry Contest with a very deep-seeded meaning.
Each of your four quatrains feature lengthy lines and an abab rhyming scheme.
Sometimes, especially with poetry, it's what is between the lines written which are the most important aspect of all.
Well penned, Anonymous Poet.
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If I'm not mistaken, Time After Time was one of Cindy Lauper's biggest hits along with Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, right?
Regardless of that, this was a well written entry for the Time Poetry Contest with a very deep-seeded meaning.
Each of your four quatrains feature lengthy lines and an abab rhyming scheme.
Sometimes, especially with poetry, it's what is between the lines written which are the most important aspect of all.
Well penned, Anonymous Poet.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2019
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
The mind is so much more than we give it credit for. While a computer is a marvelous tool, the mind is beyond a tool. There is so much to look back at and we are blessed if we can. Your poem is profoundly accurate in remind us about the many memories stored for our reverie.
Very nicely done, thank you for a trip down memory lane
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The mind is so much more than we give it credit for. While a computer is a marvelous tool, the mind is beyond a tool. There is so much to look back at and we are blessed if we can. Your poem is profoundly accurate in remind us about the many memories stored for our reverie.
Very nicely done, thank you for a trip down memory lane
Comment Written 11-Jun-2019
Comment from karenina
Okay. I see where you're gong with this... It's a clever concept to integrate quotes about time and I liked it better upon reading it a second and third "time."--It's esoteric, not an easy read--but I appreciated it more as I stopped to consider your perspective.--Karenina
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Okay. I see where you're gong with this... It's a clever concept to integrate quotes about time and I liked it better upon reading it a second and third "time."--It's esoteric, not an easy read--but I appreciated it more as I stopped to consider your perspective.--Karenina
Comment Written 11-Jun-2019
