Comment from giraffmang

Excellent

Good little piece, showing how far one would go for their offspring.

Jorge Morales stood at the rivers edge. - river's.

his feet across the bottom, but would have to put the other three - no need for the comma here.

I'm not sure you really need the swearing. it works fine without it.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 17-Feb-2019

Thanks for reading and the kind comments. Swearing left out first pass and added to be ironic. Regards, Bill

Comment from LynSys

Excellent

Ha! What a great read BHogg...so calm and loving, then BAM!
Very well written with a surprise ending that truly snapped the reader into a different reality.
Good luck in the contest.
Lynda

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019

Thanks for reading Lynda and for your kind feedback. I appreciate both! Bill

reply by LynSys on 15-Feb-2019

You're very welcome, Bill.
Lynda

Comment from HealingMuse

Excellent

Hi Bhogg,

Ha ha ha - great ending. I thought she would say, "Let's go north."

Very nicely done - nothing here to suggest improving upon.

The image you've selected works well to convey the meaning of your verse.

Thanks so much for sharing and best of luck in the voting booth!

Jan

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 13-Feb-2019

Thanks for reading and your kind feedback. I appreciate both.

Comment from JW

Excellent

I give you this rating because I know you are an excellent writer. But to be honest, I do not understand Marta response.

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 13-Feb-2019

Thanks for reading. Originally meant for this be straight up, you know, let's go North. At the last minute, I decided to be whimsical instead. The devil made me do it!

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

apostrophe needed for possession - "...river(')s edge."

I was able to call up the scene easily, though I'm not sure of the actual plot. Is this a family escaping slavery?

In any event, it's polished and well-written. Good luck.

 Comment Written 11-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 12-Feb-2019

Thanks for reading and the kind feedback. I appreciate both. I was really thinking of illegals crossing the Rio Grande! Bill

Comment from Mastery

Excellent

Funny stuff, Bill. LOL I would have just come right out and said the word though. ?? Why not? Nobody is going to fault you as long as you post a warning with the piece. LOL Just slip that word in there and see how much difference it really makes, my friend. Bob

 Comment Written 11-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 11-Feb-2019

Thanks for the hint Bob and for bringing a smile my way!

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

This is a very interesting contest entry. You say a lot in very few words. I can't believe a mother would ever leave her small children. I could never do that, especially knowing what their fate would be. Good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 11-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 11-Feb-2019

Hi Barbara - thanks for reading and your comments. Interesting that you're not the only one with the observation of the mother. When I wrote, my assumption was that Mom wouldn't get in the boat, even with kids. Oh well, limited to 100 words...Tough for me to economize words! Bill

Comment from Sankey

Excellent

This was a good write. You give the idea the lady is gonna sacrifice herself for her little ones. I hope this might progress to more story down the road. Do a review in my account as I am gonna post something in here real soon. No spags thanks Bill.

 Comment Written 11-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 11-Feb-2019

100 word story contest. Real hard for me to cut back on words. I'm usually guilty of the opposite. I'll be on the lookout for your post. Bill

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

Alrighty then...wait for a bigger one...swim across bit the kids would drown...take up residence on that side of the river,
Give all swimming lessons....add on to the boat....
God bless

 Comment Written 11-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 11-Feb-2019

Thanks for the review, and especially for making me laugh! Bill

reply by kiwijenny on 11-Feb-2019

:-)

Comment from Bill Schott

Excellent

This one-hundred-word story, The River, has the needed word count and floods the page with hilarity as the missis puts her dry foot down.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 11-Feb-2019

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reply by the author on 11-Feb-2019

Thanks for reading, Bill and the kind feedback. Just know, hard for me to limit words! Bill