Admit it
a poem about gluttony and honesty23 total reviews
Comment from country ranch writer
It isn't how much you eat as how much you eat at one sitting. Some count calories, some starve themselves some just don't care.
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It isn't how much you eat as how much you eat at one sitting. Some count calories, some starve themselves some just don't care.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2019
Comment from BeasPeas
I agree 100%. We can use all the tricks in the book, but the bottom line is calories. Must use up more than we take in. Good poem, good advice. Much luck in the contest. Marilyn
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I agree 100%. We can use all the tricks in the book, but the bottom line is calories. Must use up more than we take in. Good poem, good advice. Much luck in the contest. Marilyn
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from Janice Canerdy
You have made effective use of all twenty of your syllables to address a REAL problem in the USA. Obesity is running rampant and causing a LONG list of
health problems.
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You have made effective use of all twenty of your syllables to address a REAL problem in the USA. Obesity is running rampant and causing a LONG list of
health problems.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from LisaMay
Oh, no... I shouldn't have looked at the picture when i am hungry!
Gluttons are seldom honest, so your poem is a good way to make a point... simply and effectively.
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Oh, no... I shouldn't have looked at the picture when i am hungry!
Gluttons are seldom honest, so your poem is a good way to make a point... simply and effectively.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from misscookie
Ha, ha
Your poem pop up just in time i just finished dinner.
And I'm proud to say I didn't over eat. But I'm going crazy craving for something sweet
Thank you for sharing
cookie
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Ha, ha
Your poem pop up just in time i just finished dinner.
And I'm proud to say I didn't over eat. But I'm going crazy craving for something sweet
Thank you for sharing
cookie
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from Cole King
Good poem. It sounds a little like a jingle (or maybe a mantra). I am having an issue, though, with some of the sounds in the poem. There is a big variety of sounds, but not many repeat to make meaningful sounds devices. There is the rhyme, but "prevaricate" seems a bit out of place and forced. The rest of the words in the poem are rather simple, but then we have "prevaricate", which seems like it is used only to rhyme with ate. The more reversed sentence structure in the first line also goes against the rather simple language of the majority of the poem. Maybe make the whole poem sound complex in structure. Just something to think about.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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Good poem. It sounds a little like a jingle (or maybe a mantra). I am having an issue, though, with some of the sounds in the poem. There is a big variety of sounds, but not many repeat to make meaningful sounds devices. There is the rhyme, but "prevaricate" seems a bit out of place and forced. The rest of the words in the poem are rather simple, but then we have "prevaricate", which seems like it is used only to rhyme with ate. The more reversed sentence structure in the first line also goes against the rather simple language of the majority of the poem. Maybe make the whole poem sound complex in structure. Just something to think about.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from LynSys
Well, I'm just going to have dinner now! What in the world would your diary entry look like ;o)))
Very Clever, Miranda and says it all in 20 syllables.
good luck in the contest!
Lynda
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Well, I'm just going to have dinner now! What in the world would your diary entry look like ;o)))
Very Clever, Miranda and says it all in 20 syllables.
good luck in the contest!
Lynda
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from susand3022
Hahahahaha! Hi Miranda, this is a funny poem, I like it very much. I also really like that you didn't define the word 'prevaricate' and let the reader look it up!!! It's a pet peave of mine to find some simple word defined in the Author's notes because the Author thinks me too stupid to understand a word... especially when it's an easy one. I like it when I have to look something up and I learn something new. Thanks for the new vocabulary word!
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Hahahahaha! Hi Miranda, this is a funny poem, I like it very much. I also really like that you didn't define the word 'prevaricate' and let the reader look it up!!! It's a pet peave of mine to find some simple word defined in the Author's notes because the Author thinks me too stupid to understand a word... especially when it's an easy one. I like it when I have to look something up and I learn something new. Thanks for the new vocabulary word!
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from HealingMuse
Hi Miranda,
Haha - great write and an excellent contest entry.
I like the image you selected to help convey meaning. It works well.
I don't see a single syllable out of place to suggest that you might consider improving upon.
Thank you for sharing your work and best of luck in the contest!
Jan
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Hi Miranda,
Haha - great write and an excellent contest entry.
I like the image you selected to help convey meaning. It works well.
I don't see a single syllable out of place to suggest that you might consider improving upon.
Thank you for sharing your work and best of luck in the contest!
Jan
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
Comment from CathyM
LOL I love this! I know some people this applies to, myself included. I heard someone tell me they only had a small steak for dinner. Then as the conversation progresses they talk about the 12 oz steak with a baked potato. Each time they open their mouth a little more food was added. I laughed so hard when I read this and thought of that conversation.
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LOL I love this! I know some people this applies to, myself included. I heard someone tell me they only had a small steak for dinner. Then as the conversation progresses they talk about the 12 oz steak with a baked potato. Each time they open their mouth a little more food was added. I laughed so hard when I read this and thought of that conversation.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2019
