Act of Endurance
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "A Broiler"Dawn of Chaos
11 total reviews
Comment from Wy Jung
This made me laugh as you don't read poetry about the body's inner workings every day. ..but I wish you did!
The usage of words in the beginning comparing food going down the hatch like bodies down a water slide was clever.
I'd like to see it formatted a little differently so that the rhythm of the poem is easier to follow and the words used have the space they need to be fully digested (....pun intended....)
Keep it up!
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
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This made me laugh as you don't read poetry about the body's inner workings every day. ..but I wish you did!
The usage of words in the beginning comparing food going down the hatch like bodies down a water slide was clever.
I'd like to see it formatted a little differently so that the rhythm of the poem is easier to follow and the words used have the space they need to be fully digested (....pun intended....)
Keep it up!
Comment Written 08-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
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Thanks for this shout, considering your statements, welcoming comments assistance.
Comment from Wendyanne
Well you have certainly described the act of eating and digesting food very graphically. It is certainly very different. I'm not really too sure what I think about it to be honest!
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
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Well you have certainly described the act of eating and digesting food very graphically. It is certainly very different. I'm not really too sure what I think about it to be honest!
Comment Written 08-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
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I feel you. I aimed this intent at better health: by wiser picks we digest.I miss that goal apparently. Thanking you for this generous rate despite faults.
Comment from Daylily
It is said that we are what we eat. It is the responsibility of people to take care of their bodies in order to maximum their engagement in the upside aspects of human living. Good health in a positive world is a noteworthy ideal.
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2023
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It is said that we are what we eat. It is the responsibility of people to take care of their bodies in order to maximum their engagement in the upside aspects of human living. Good health in a positive world is a noteworthy ideal.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2023
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I'm glad certain aspects were found appealing to your interests: thanking you for your input and generous rate.
Comment from royowen
I think we tend to treat the human body like a rubbish dump sometimes, the act of poor eating can put a number of stresses on the human but, but I guess we'll pay the price somewhere, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2023
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I think we tend to treat the human body like a rubbish dump sometimes, the act of poor eating can put a number of stresses on the human but, but I guess we'll pay the price somewhere, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 02-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2023
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The body, indeed, is the human second greatest challenge, given the daily exchanges throughput our life course: certainly it takes a banging. Thanking you for your generous rate.
Comment from harmony13
I found the author's words deep, educating, thought provoking and
creative. I agree with the author we must learn to control what we are
eating! I also found the read of this poem very interesting. The poem
flows and connects well. The artwork goes will with this poem.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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I found the author's words deep, educating, thought provoking and
creative. I agree with the author we must learn to control what we are
eating! I also found the read of this poem very interesting. The poem
flows and connects well. The artwork goes will with this poem.
Comment Written 11-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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I normally struggle, detailing factors to my reader, finding your notes comforting, feeling at least I'm on the right track. Thanking you for your review, illustrating a connection: and this generous rate.
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is an excellent non fiction story chapter. I enjoyed reading it. Your entire presentation is good. You use descriptive words that draw in a reader. Best wishes!
Alexandra
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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This is an excellent non fiction story chapter. I enjoyed reading it. Your entire presentation is good. You use descriptive words that draw in a reader. Best wishes!
Alexandra
Comment Written 11-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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Thanking you for this warm statement, taking it as an approval, prevailing those given statements. Also, for that generous rate.
Comment from JSD
Well thank you for sharing this but I feel you go too far into the world of the abstract and surreal. Personally - and of course you must ignore me - if the writing doesn't communicate to the reader it fails. I don't feel you communicate. But many would say that about my stuff. Ah well!
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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Well thank you for sharing this but I feel you go too far into the world of the abstract and surreal. Personally - and of course you must ignore me - if the writing doesn't communicate to the reader it fails. I don't feel you communicate. But many would say that about my stuff. Ah well!
Comment Written 10-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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I hear you, thinking over your given thoughts, feeling certain aspects were found to you as appealing, meriting this generous rate given by you: dispite. Thanking you for all. Best hopes towards your own
Comment from Douglas Goff
Ah, a corrupt system. Yet the human body is an incredible mechanism. Why the human brain alone is unfathomable in its own capacity.
Great thinking piece.
D
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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Ah, a corrupt system. Yet the human body is an incredible mechanism. Why the human brain alone is unfathomable in its own capacity.
Great thinking piece.
D
Comment Written 09-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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Yes the human body is an incredible mechanism, generating our brains those needed services throughout, given to us consciousness to discern things that would corrupt those performances. Thanking you for the generous rate: and complimenting thoughts.
Comment from lancellot
Human digestion and eating practices is a good topic for writing commentary on or an essay about. This "poetry" requires mor defined and recognizable form. As is, the reading of sentences is choppy.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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Human digestion and eating practices is a good topic for writing commentary on or an essay about. This "poetry" requires mor defined and recognizable form. As is, the reading of sentences is choppy.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2023
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Okay! I didn't want to get professional with this, thinking a shout to watch how one eats, seeing this was a failed connection. Thanking you for your awakening viewpoints, prevailing this write statements: plus, that generous rate dispite.
Comment from Earl Corp
I had to read this twice to grasp the gist that you were referring to the digestive process in a human being. Your author's notes didn't clarify if for me.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2019
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I had to read this twice to grasp the gist that you were referring to the digestive process in a human being. Your author's notes didn't clarify if for me.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2019
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New write assuming pits, considering your thought pertaining footnote, thanking you dispute for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
