Reviews from

The French Letter

Viewing comments for Chapter 37 "A Chance Meeting"
A Novel

31 total reviews 
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Excellent
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Hi Tony,
There certainly does seem to be drama wherever Charles goes but this time perhaps it may work to his advantage.
I am in awe of the ease with which the chapters flow as though in country conversation flowing freely from one chapter to the next.
A clever blending of ideas and chapters.
Blessings
Shirley

 Comment Written 03-May-2019


reply by the author on 08-May-2019
    Thanks for your encouragement, Shirley. Much appreciated. Tony.
Comment from Adri7enne
Excellent
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"He burbled on, ignoring the intended sleight," I learned something. I would have spelled it "slight", which would have been wrong. Way to go, Tony!
Your story wanders on. I'm assuming Helen turned out to be gay, or something. Pedantic old hucksters meeting on a train. You've got them sounding like English aristocrats. Next!

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 30-Jan-2019
    As you say, the story wanders on! It probably needs a kick in the ribs at this stage to urge it into a gallop! As always, I appreciate your review. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Debbie Pope
Excellent
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I want you to know for sure that I find this chapter worth more than a five star rating, but I am out of sixes. The conversation in this chapter is particularly good. That "David" comment shows Brandon's insight and his cruel sense of humor. It also drives home the snootiness of British upper class. You leave me curious about the proposal. Of course I will be continuing this great story.

 Comment Written 26-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 27-Jan-2019
    Thanks, Debbie. Glad you are still enjoying it. Your curiosity will be satisfied in the next chapter - at least partially!
Comment from Teresa Alford
Excellent
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Really good story. I would give you six starts but I am out. Next time, for sure.

What font and size did you use? It is very clear and easily read.

"The thought of being trapped with him drivelling on for the entire journey sent shivers up my spine." I have sat next to that person. I hope I have never been that person.

Great job! TA ";~)

 Comment Written 26-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    Thanks, Teresa. I appreciate your review and positive comments. I use Garamond Font Size 22. Sometimes, for poetry and shorter pieces, I use Font Size 24.
reply by Teresa Alford on 26-Jan-2019
    Thank you!!
Comment from BWReal
Good
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Coming into this story at Chapters 36 and 37, I feel a bit of an interloper. Nevertheless it's easy to see the writing is crisp and the story itself a fascinating excursion, with the main character (Charles) apparently gadding about the globe. His meeting with Sir David and their consequent conversation offers few insights into their characters, however---I gathered they were at odds over something, as I sensed a trace of tension in their exchange. The dialogue was a stodgy in spots, as most British tit-for-tat is...with the "old chap" bits a bit thick. Still, I was waiting for some revelation to clue me in as to why this constituted a full chapter. Not enough What, When, and Why was given to move the story along. (Sorry--just my impression). And Chapter 36 was woefully brief. But the story itself oozes promise. Keep pecking away, old chap!

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 Comment Written 26-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    Thanks for your review and comments. I agree with you about the chapter lengths. They don?t really match the book?s chapter structure. I find that 1000-1500 words is about all that most reviewers here on FS will read at a time. I expect that Chapters 36-38 will all eventually be rolled into one.
Comment from rspoet
Excellent
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Hello Tony,
An interesting encounter with Sir David Brockenhurst, whose name seems familiar to me, a village or town in England. He seems more like Liverwurst, rather than Brochenhurst to me. I was glad to see the mention of his affected speech. He sounds like some old movie caricature.
These chance meetings always raise suspicions. It looks like that old painting will be a lure of some type.
I like the return to the original theme of the letter and its mystery.
Well done
Alas, I've left all my sixes on the channel train.
Robert

 Comment Written 26-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    You?re right about Brockenhurst being an English place name. Perhaps that?s how this shonky character chose his moniker! As always, I appreciate your review and comments.
Comment from Pam (respa)
Excellent
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-This is a good chapter, Tony, that has
Charles in his element with his witty,
and sometimes, snide comments.
-Sir David is quite a character,
and who knows what kind of
proposition he has for Charles?
-Charles needs another predicament
to get involved in (LOL).
-I like the banter between Charles and David,
especially when David doesn't get the intended barb!
-I like the last part of the chapter when
you bring us back to where the story all began-
the letter, envelope, and Alain.



 Comment Written 26-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    Thanks, Pam. I appreciate your review and your suggestions for this chapter. I?ve been looking for ways to bring the narrative back on track, with a renewed focus on the original idea.
reply by Pam (respa) on 26-Jan-2019
    You are very welcome, Tony. I think you are doing a really good job getting the story back on track. I think Helen and Jeanne started being a detraction. It's nice to see Charles being himself, too.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Excellent
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Well this is an interesting turn in this story Tony. So another trip to Paris and more intrigue in the French capital is in the cards. Great chapter, and I'm looking forward to where Sir David takes Charles.
cheers,
valda

 Comment Written 26-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    Thanks for the review, Valda. Yes, I think Charles will soon be on his way back to France.
Comment from Treischel
Excellent
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I like how you show the play and counter play in their discussions.

Hmm. David now mentioned the "coincidence" more than once.

A colorful self-characterization - an Old Etonian and a Knight of the Realm.

Another colorful phrase - a parody of English upper-class banter.

A good transition chapter, that promises more.

Clever interplay between food and conversation. Adds to the color and reality.

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    Thanks Tom. Glad you are still finding it entertaining. All the best, Tony.
Comment from Mustang Patty
Excellent
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Hi, Tony,

I went through this chapter with a more careful eye, and so I've given you some notes. However, I found this next part to be interesting because we are given more information and intrigue.

I'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of the two women for more tension and nuance.

a few notes:

In this sentence, I decided to retaliate by taking him up on the offer to call him David. The phrase, 'on the offer' isn't correct in its placement. What you're referring to, 'call him David,' isn't clear. Perhaps, restructure the sentence?

'No doubt, Sir David sensed my reserve+, and there was an awkward pause before his conversational gambit.' Since this compound sentence contains two independent clauses joined with the conjunction, 'and,' you need the comma before the 'and.'

'"As a matter of fact, David..." I gave the name slight emphasis, and paused to relish his reaction,' Just the opposite of the last note; in this compound sentence, you are joining an independent phrase with a dependent one, so the comma isn't needed. I've come to the conclusion that the best way to remember it is once you've determined whether the two parts of the sentence are independent or dependent, you know you need a comma to JOIN the sentences with the conjunction when there are one of each, and you need to use the conjunction to delineate the complete thoughts from one another.

There are a few more places where the comma needs to be adjusted.

Looking forward to the next chapter,

~patty~

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2019


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2019
    Many thanks for this useful review, Patty, and the refresher on comma use. It's an area that I need to tighten up in my writing.