Reviews from

The One Who Holds My Heart

The first date that really mattered.

17 total reviews 
Comment from Ricky1024
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

My first date was at age Twenty.
It was a casier naned Susan.
That night I was no longer a Virgin but...
We would sneak weekends at the Island House when her parents wouldn't be there from Ridgefield in New Jersey and I was feel in love but...
Time progressed and her Sister Judy we.
All lone, the last daughter of three, Susan wanted to marry but...
Our relationship started yo fizzle s she cheated and went back to Bill.
Heartbroken and depressed, I downed a 'Six Pck ND passed out.
Michelle rescued me and I he my first hangover and first lesson.
I eventually Married someone that new Suan and She told me that Susn would be g her to buy booze.
Susan demanded that I married and that our children would be well dressed for church.
That was over 43 years ago and I still miss her but was way too young?
Plus when Judy married I was not allowed to dance with Susan and afterwards when She was drunk, she asked me to drive both her and her girlfriend home.
It was a nasty rainfal and late.
When she opened her door she dropped all of Judy's envelopee of cash!
As I was trying to help her, she revolted and got nasty as if I was stealing!!!
I had to get away, so I dropped her off and went down to the YMCA to just think.
I never dated in highschool as I was extremely shy.
She was my world?
She again got nasty when I told her I was down the road at the WMCA!
The next day I said goodbye.
I would call her at college each day on the aPhone booth phone at Becker I Wooster, Massachusetts right after Starsky and Hutch.
(Remember that show?)
And she would brag to her friends that he would call...
Never did we even go to a movie or out to eat.
Just a wedding in Saugus Massachusetts for her dorm mate which turned into a nighmare!
She had lost all this weight but had started smoking again which we agreed that we didn't need that in our lives.
After the Loss of my wife Carolyn of Twenty Years I reflect back and have even tried to reach out and find Susan with no luck using her Maiden name of 'Blick.'
Is this right or wrong since I did find love again with Nancy but another nightmare?
Thanks and your story was sweet and well written which makes me feel not so alone.
Ricky...


 Comment Written 26-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2018
    I am glad you were touched by my true story. God gives us the freedom to choose, even Him. He offered His Son as the perfect sacrifice for our sin. I believed and received this good news at sixteen. The Holy Spirit became the voice inside me and I never looked back. I would only get in trouble if I chose not to listen to His sweet pleading voice. God loves you Ricky and your family. Ask Him for a special woman to share that with. I continue to pray for your hurt and losses. I hope you know with God, you have a life worth living. John 10:10 for you today ! Yes, my kids loved Starsky and Hutch! Thanks for the sixer!
    Kindest regards,
    Sally
Comment from LaFrance
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your first date story mostly was a pleasure to read. Yet, first, your story started that you blamed your stepfather for you not having second dates, due to someone you were dating said he was mean. -- This could be a story on its own to strong to leave wondering how mean was he.

Second, was Jack running when he went by you or driving? That was confusing.

Other than that I enjoyed your story.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
    Thank you for your review. I thought the story was clear, Jack was running on foot as he passed by me asking if I needed a ride, then proceeded to pull up in front of the school in his Mustang. I?m glad you were able to enjoy my story. I appreciate your critique.
    Kindest regards,
    Sally
Comment from LoveLifeKnight
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

this is a great story and i am so glad it is true one. i love reading and knowing about peoples lives and loves. the fact that you have your own happy ending and that you are no longer a teenage girl makes me happy too. im sure you've jumped in a lot of water since!

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
    Thank you so much for the excellent review. Yes, very true and I am blessed ever day I draw breath next to this man. He loves my writing too! Go figure.
    Kindest regards to you and your family.
    Sally
Comment from Hugh McDowell
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Excellent story. Great pace and flow. Told very sequentially so the reader has no problem following along. It is a sweet love story without being sappy. I liked the dialogue, seems natural and fits. Congrats on the 43 years. Hugh

 Comment Written 25-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 25-Aug-2018
    Thank you so much for the excellent review. I am so glad you liked it. I appreciate the specific feedback, too.
    Kindest regards,
    Sally
Comment from Gert sherwood
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hello author read you long story of how you finally met the man (Jack) you accidentally met and how as time goes on ends up with 43 years of marriage and smiles the children you wanted.
Gert

 Comment Written 24-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 24-Aug-2018
    Thank you so much for the excellent review. I am so glad you liked it.
    Kindest regards,
    Sally
reply by Gert sherwood on 24-Aug-2018
    You are welcome Sally Law
    If you are interested in reading of my husband met, I will give you the title.
    Gert
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2018
    Yes, please!
reply by Gert sherwood on 25-Aug-2018
    Hello author
    so you are asking me to tell you the title of how and my husband and still married for 64 years it's in my portifilo and the title is
    How I Met My Man, Stan
    if you cannot find it I will send you the link
    Thank you for asking.
    Smiles Gert
Comment from Marvin Calloway
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like this story. It had kind of a roller coaster arc of drama to make the details interesting.
When I read the following, "someone who is just messing with me a bit." I thought, 'a bit' should be omitted. Then I read the second one and was sure the first 'a bit' should be gone.
Who's Mr. Wrong? I guess I missed something.
I don't know the rule but for some reason the word, 'towards' (with an 's' doesn't sound right to me.
I hope these small gripes don't offend you. It's a very good story.
Have a faith filled day.
Marv

 Comment Written 24-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 24-Aug-2018
    Thank you for your excellent review and critique. Towards and toward are both acceptable. Towards is used primarily by Europeans. I lived many years with my European grandparents. Mr. wrong was described at the very beginning and I referred to him a second time. No, I am not offended at all. I appreciate your critique very much.
    Kindest regards,
    Sally
Comment from Teri7
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a very sweet and romantic first dated contest entry. It made my heart smile as I read it all the way through. It sounds like a really great first date that ended up forever! Best wishes to you in the contest and in life with your soul mate. Blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 23-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 23-Aug-2018
    Thank you so much Teri. I appreciate the excellent review. I am blessed and pray the same for you and your family.
    Kindest regards,
    Sally
reply by Teri7 on 23-Aug-2018
    Thank you too Sally! He blesses us every day! Hope you have a great evening!
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2018
    Thank you dear Teri, you too! Sal
reply by Teri7 on 23-Aug-2018
    blessings my friend!
Comment from tfawcus
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It's great when things finally work out so well! You describe the worries of teenage years in a way that really draws your reader in. A most enjoyable read. I'm not sure what you are looking for in the way of feedback on the writing. Just for the moment I'll confine myself to a capital M for Mustang! Sounds like that's a car you won't forget in a hurry!

 Comment Written 21-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
    Thank you so much for the excellent review. I am legally blind and for whatever reason, my proofreader missed Mustang. Thank you, I will fix that right now. I throughly enjoy Fan Story and all the wonderful imput I receive daily.
    All my best,
    Sally
Comment from kiwijenny
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This gave me so much joy as I thought of my own love. He too was courteous . He too opened doors for me. He took me home in the rain and put my ten speed in his car. He and I have been married 36 years. They get more glorious the longer we are together. He is my best friend. He's helping me go to heaven as I help him'
Thank you
God bless

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 19-Aug-2018
    Thank you so much for the excellent review.! I am so glad it stirred your joy, as well. It?s nice to know I have a kindred spirit here at Fan Story who knows what I am talking about. May God bless your marriage and family for many years to come.
    All my best,
    Sally
reply by kiwijenny on 19-Aug-2018
    Sally you are adorable. Same
Comment from zanya
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a beautiful story of real and genuine love that has lasted a lifetime and brought joy and happiness - in these strange times we now live in the 'message' we seem to get is that marriage is almost a doomed institution - which of course it is not - thanks for sharing

 Comment Written 16-Aug-2018


reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
    Than you so much for the excellent review. I am so glad you could appreciate it. We do live in strange times. I always blessed it brings encouragement and hope to anyone who reads it.
    All my best,
    Sally🌺