Reviews from

Little Poems

Viewing comments for Chapter 457 "The Fairy and the Gnome"
Small and Specialty Poems

11 total reviews 
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
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Wow, this appears to be a most challenging form, Treischel. I can make out the reflection, in your picture, of what does look, with the stretch of the imagination, kind of like a fairy. :) Your imagination took you to a great place, and I'm guessing that you had a lot of fun writing this piece.

"chasing waterfalls" ... love this! Your closing couplet makes a logical conclusion; almost a "and the moral of the story is ....". The form appears to be very well executed and your tale is chock-full of creativity. I enjoyed reading your Droighneach poem. ~~ Connie

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2018
    Thank you very much Connie. It indeed was a very challenging write, One needs to kiss the Blarney stone first and drink a Guiness first, I think. Lol. But I confess, it was fun too. Glad you could see the fairy. A very discerning review is always welcome.
Comment from robina1978
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An excellent photo where I think I can see your fairy. You took the photo yourself, well done. I can't say if you succeeded or not. You asked a lot from yourself. Nice to read anyway.

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Ine. Glad you could see that fairy. Yes, this was a very tough one to write. I wouldn't recommend it to most.
Comment from Roxanna Andrews
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Very clever and well done. It is much to complicated for me. I just write silly rhymes that are super easy. I do find this very enchanting and am glad Tinkerbell sprinkled her faerie dust. A+

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Roxanna. Glad you enjoyed. Yes this was a very tough one to write. Good old Tink! She stole the show.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
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A very well-written Droighneach poem and great imaginationary skills to see the figures in the water and the stone as the gnome with eyes watching over tinkerbell's reflection. I see also a dancing figure in the waterfall itself.





 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Sandra. My goodness. I hadn't noticed that one in the falls before. Another Fairy! Love it!
Comment from Pantygynt
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I take it that the cross rhymes are like the Welsh not syllable specific. In the second line for example the a rhyme falls on the third syllable (calls) whereas the schematic diagram shows it falling in the fifth syllable. I think to have kissed the Blarney Stone would be a distinct advantage when setting out to compose one of these. Those three syllable words are magnificent.

I shall bookcase this.

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Pantygynt. Yes they are flexible, like the Welsh. Thanks for he input. Those 3 syllable words really stretch the vocabulary for both the end-rhymes and their cross-rhyme compodres.
Comment from Ricky1024
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This was well written with great theme and imagery.
Adjective Content was aligned well with Objective Content and Descriptive Measures aligned perfectl.
It flowed well and read well with no grammar issues as well.
Adjective Content was aligned well with Objective Content and Descriptive Measures aligned perfectly.
Dr Ricky 1024.Later today

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Ricky. I appreciate the review and comments.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
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The poem is as sweet as candy with a sprinkling of magic and fantasy throughout these words, a joyous and uplifting mystical write which was born out of nature and the sparkle of water, great uplifting words, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Dolly. Your review was delightful and filled me with joy.
Comment from Joan E.
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Thank you for always encouraging us to see unusual shapes in natural scenes. It's always a treat to see the photograph of the image that inspired you. If that weren't enough, you selected a very complicated form as your vehicle to describe this animated still. I enjoyed your internal and end rhymes and "carousel" metaphor. Your envoi gives the tale a forever quality. Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Joan. Your review was wonderful to receive and very uplifting, as well as accutely discerning.
Comment from tfawcus
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This one is difficult. I can follow it just, I think, and it looks as if you have most of the rules incorporated in yours.
You've rhymed in quatrains abab cdcd efef gaga and have all the internal cross rhymes in except in the first line where I think "as fairies will" should be a b-rhyme. I take it the the exact position of the cross-rhyme is, to some extent, optional.
There's alliteraton in each line, though I was slow to pick up th an-an (L4) and the un-un (L11).
Is the (dxd) in the last line meant to be (xxd)?
It's not easy to attain the required 'harmony of sound' in a 13-syllable line and I did stumble over the rhythm of yours once or twice. I think it might be easier with a 12-syllable line, which splits nicely into two three-syllable anapaests plus three iambs or trochees. Lightly tripping anapaests might lend a musical tone to the lines, de-emphasising the three-syllable words.
Love the picture and the way you have paired it with your story. A theme of from faerie-land fits an Irish form rather well!

 Comment Written 22-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you Tony for taking a very diligent look in this excellent review. I take your point on 12 vs 13. i thought it a bit choppy in places too, although no specific meter was defined (there is that reference to cywddydd, so I thought I'm ok). Concerning the xxd, I was limited by my first word requirement, so i settled with Tiny Tinkerbell dx(d) having the d in parens being the 3 syllable word. I guess the problem is that the first word I used was also a 3 syllable word.. Bad choice I guess.
Comment from nartoonla
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Hello, My kind of place and what I enjoy reading... a touch of magical fairy dust that softens all that is around with beauty and a silent melody of peace. A story can be created from your poem and when it is written let me know for I be there enjoying it as the Fairy and the Gnome...

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 Comment Written 22-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
    Thank you nattoonia. Ok, I will, if I develop one.