Reviews from

Random Belief

Discussing belief

63 total reviews 
Comment from jppoet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Bravo, this is a Fantabulous poem in which the metrical cadences dance in sweet harmony with the artistic rhymes. Two suggestions; a photo
would have contributed to its mood and imagery and, more important,
your red-lettered text on the gray background is very difficult to read,
especially by old goats like myself, Congrats on Fanstory's deserved
accolades. Blessings, john

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018

Comment from dragonpoet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This sounds like religious faith as it is used by a radical or terrorist. It also could be the thought of an atheist.

Good luck in the contest.

Keep writing

Joan

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018

Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Well, there is not a lot I can say about this Acrostic, except Bravo. You have written a perfect piece, true to form, excellent ababab and ditto in second stanza. Well worded - good simple display and I wish you well in the contest. A good entry. Warm regards Dorothy

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018

Comment from c_lucas
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

One should study different belief systems in their early adult life. I did for the first thirty years of my life and found one that I have stayed with for the rest of my life. I enjoyed the acrostic verse. Good luck in your contest.

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018

Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very well done. Good work on the acrostic. The message is clear and rational. I don't know if it really IS self-deceit. That implies that one knows better, has facts from the opp side and sufficient knowledge to understand them. Perhaps rationality is not what drives this person. Just a thought.

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018

Comment from misscookie
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You captured my attention from the freest line to the last
You also did a great job with powerful
and meaningful words.
Thank you for sharing
Cookie

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018

Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Random Belief is a skillfully written acrostic poem. The use of rhyme adds much to the cohesiveness and flow of the poem. All of the lines are appropriate to the topic. Good to see you writing again, my friend~Debbie

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 09-Feb-2018
    Hi Debbie and I am enjoying being back with the fold. I am finding new talent and missing some old friends. I am so glad you are still in the struggle and I am honored by this review my friend. Take care Debbie. tom
Comment from rama devi
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Impacting acrostic, Intensely voiced. Good rhymes and flow. thought provoking substance.

Belief is born of self-deceit

Embellished by mythology

POTENT OPENING LINES!

Lost reason then will take retreat

Inciting new theology

Enwrapped in zealotry's conceit

Forged from false ideology


Great rhymes and word choices in the above, but the last line has forced scansion compared to the smooth flow of all other lines. not sure how to remedy it. The alliteration of F is excellent.


Warmly,

rd sis

 Comment Written 08-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    Hey sis you got the early version. Please take another look. It is now entitled "Random Belief and I think you will like the changes I've made. Let me know sis. Thank you dear. tom
reply by rama devi on 08-Feb-2018
    Yes..I opened your poem this morning and kept the tab ready all day for when i could have time and focus to edit. I much prefer the new version. Well done!


    Love,
    rd
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a brilliantly written acrostic. The iambic tetrameter punchy and delivers the message with the clarity it needs.

Very nicely done, Tom!

Gloria

 Comment Written 08-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    Hi Gloria. I have changed this post with a few little edits and a new stanza. The poem is now entitled "Random Belief. If you get a chance to read the new version let me know what you think. Thank you dear Gloria. tom
reply by Gloria .... on 08-Feb-2018
    Yep, I like the extra stanza. Do you mean dissent? More please. :))
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    I have corrected the word error Gloria and I am so blessed to have you take the time to reread it. I thank you so
    much for your generosity. tom
reply by Gloria .... on 08-Feb-2018
    I really enjoy your work, so it's my pleasure.
Comment from Violet WolfChild
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Bravo! This is a well written acrostic, and I find your description of belief quite enjoyable. It shows how belief can separate. Well said my friend.

 Comment Written 08-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    Hi Violet. I have added another stanza, changed the title and did an edit or two. If you get a chance I sure would appreciate your take on these changes my friend. I am most honored.
reply by Violet WolfChild on 08-Feb-2018
    I love it!
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    Thank you Violet for taking the time my friend. I appreciate it. tom
reply by Violet WolfChild on 09-Feb-2018
    you're welcome.