I dream...
I ponder93 total reviews
Comment from Joy Graham
Hello Mystery Poet,
I think a lot of us dream these things with you. I'll never understand why some folks fuel their hatred. Your short poem packs a punch in your message. Nice aabb rhymes throughout. Best wishes in the contest.
Sincerely Joy xx
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
  |
Hello Mystery Poet,
I think a lot of us dream these things with you. I'll never understand why some folks fuel their hatred. Your short poem packs a punch in your message. Nice aabb rhymes throughout. Best wishes in the contest.
Sincerely Joy xx
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Joy for this great review and comments,
Comment from robina1978
An excellent photo of Earth, that complements your poem perfectly. I just checked the requirements and think you fulfilled them very well. Best wishes for the prompt.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
An excellent photo of Earth, that complements your poem perfectly. I just checked the requirements and think you fulfilled them very well. Best wishes for the prompt.
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Ine, for this great review and comments,
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem. We look around us and see the chaos in the world and Wonder what will become of us when our home comes to a final end. Is there hope for us to survive?
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
A very well-written poem. We look around us and see the chaos in the world and Wonder what will become of us when our home comes to a final end. Is there hope for us to survive?
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Sandra, for this great review and comments,
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello!
Thoughtful questions posed in your lovely 'statement-question' poem.
If I may... in the second verse, second line, I would capitalize Will as it begins a sentence. I would also place a period after the first line of the second verse. Reads smoother that way...
Best Wishes,
diane
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
Hello!
Thoughtful questions posed in your lovely 'statement-question' poem.
If I may... in the second verse, second line, I would capitalize Will as it begins a sentence. I would also place a period after the first line of the second verse. Reads smoother that way...
Best Wishes,
diane
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Diane, for this great review and comments,
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That is a well written first line, 'clothed in hate' describes our world perfectly. So sad. To have a world free of hate, and full of joy would be a paradise on Earth, now that would be wonderful. This is a really good contest entry. Good luck! Sandra xx
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
That is a well written first line, 'clothed in hate' describes our world perfectly. So sad. To have a world free of hate, and full of joy would be a paradise on Earth, now that would be wonderful. This is a really good contest entry. Good luck! Sandra xx
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Sandra, for this great review and comments,
Comment from Ogden
Your poem provides food for thought.
If you are depending on someone with wings to protect the world from annihilation, I hope you have a second choice,
because I doubt an angel has the clearance or skills to pull that off, and the world probably wouldn't be worth saving after a pilot drops a big one on the bad guys to save our country.
Maybe wish for peace instead. That might do it.
Don (aka Ogden)
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
Your poem provides food for thought.
If you are depending on someone with wings to protect the world from annihilation, I hope you have a second choice,
because I doubt an angel has the clearance or skills to pull that off, and the world probably wouldn't be worth saving after a pilot drops a big one on the bad guys to save our country.
Maybe wish for peace instead. That might do it.
Don (aka Ogden)
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Don, for this great review and comments, (He's not an angel)
Comment from Pantygynt
This consists of two verses. The contest rules state: "Write a verse that makes a statement, then the next verse forms a question..." The first verse consists of both astatement in the first couplet and a question in the second. The second verse contains two separate questions so the intended alternating of questions and statements simply does not happen. If I were a member of the compliance committee I would throw this out without a second thought as it doesn't comply.
I strongly suggest that you make adjustments in order to comply. The rules allow for any length of verse so i suggest you simply split your first quatrain into two couplets. The second verse needs more work to get it into line with the requirements.
The ideas are sound but the poem must comply. Come back to me if you do alter it and I will reassess.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
 |
This consists of two verses. The contest rules state: "Write a verse that makes a statement, then the next verse forms a question..." The first verse consists of both astatement in the first couplet and a question in the second. The second verse contains two separate questions so the intended alternating of questions and statements simply does not happen. If I were a member of the compliance committee I would throw this out without a second thought as it doesn't comply.
I strongly suggest that you make adjustments in order to comply. The rules allow for any length of verse so i suggest you simply split your first quatrain into two couplets. The second verse needs more work to get it into line with the requirements.
The ideas are sound but the poem must comply. Come back to me if you do alter it and I will reassess.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Wow how serious! Thanks.
Comment from Bill Schott
This Statement-Question poem, I Dream, really blends these two types of sentences into a smooth combination of insightful speculation and wishful musings. Nice.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
This Statement-Question poem, I Dream, really blends these two types of sentences into a smooth combination of insightful speculation and wishful musings. Nice.
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Bill, for this great review and comments,
Comment from Dean Kuch
A question posed in poetic form that many of us ponder, I think.
Good rhyming throughout in an aabb rhyme scheme.
I hope you fare well in the contest.
~Dean
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
A question posed in poetic form that many of us ponder, I think.
Good rhyming throughout in an aabb rhyme scheme.
I hope you fare well in the contest.
~Dean
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Dean, for this great review and comments,
-
My pleasure. :)
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written contest entry for the Statement/Question contest. You used very good words with a very good question. You talked about if there is hope. I know there is hope in Jesus Christ! Best wishes in the contest. Teri
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
|
This is a very well written contest entry for the Statement/Question contest. You used very good words with a very good question. You talked about if there is hope. I know there is hope in Jesus Christ! Best wishes in the contest. Teri
Comment Written 29-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2018
-
Thanks Teri, for this great review and comments,
-
you are so welcome!
