Going to the Party - Dialogue Only
A mature couple prepare for a night out.22 total reviews
Comment from evilynne
That's cute and funny. It is well written and sticks to the dialogue only format. I can just imagine you and your wife getting ready. Best of luck in the contest. Evi
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2018
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That's cute and funny. It is well written and sticks to the dialogue only format. I can just imagine you and your wife getting ready. Best of luck in the contest. Evi
Comment Written 11-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2018
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Thank you so much for your review and kind words. I really appreciate it.
Comment from Ric Myworld
I would bet that just about everyone who reads this will remember a similar conversation in their own lives. For me, there were too many of them. LOL! Thanks for sharing, and good luck in the contest. :-)
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2018
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I would bet that just about everyone who reads this will remember a similar conversation in their own lives. For me, there were too many of them. LOL! Thanks for sharing, and good luck in the contest. :-)
Comment Written 11-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2018
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Thank you for your review and kind words.
Comment from apky
A good and genuine look at a married couple who have been together long enough to know each other's little faultlines and live with them quite "amiably". I like how you show that despite the bits and pieces of arguments, such a couple are on a united front when "in public".
Well done, Daniel.
(")Oh, there it is! That's it right back there!"
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2018
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A good and genuine look at a married couple who have been together long enough to know each other's little faultlines and live with them quite "amiably". I like how you show that despite the bits and pieces of arguments, such a couple are on a united front when "in public".
Well done, Daniel.
(")Oh, there it is! That's it right back there!"
Comment Written 10-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2018
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Thank you so much apky. I wished I knew your first name. LOL. I truly appreciate you kind words. Thank you.
Comment from FlamingSpade
Congratulations on 31 years together! As I was reading your post, I got the sense the couple were comfortable together but would have never guessed that long. Sweet piece.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2018
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Congratulations on 31 years together! As I was reading your post, I got the sense the couple were comfortable together but would have never guessed that long. Sweet piece.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2018
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Thank you so much for your kind words and review. I truly appreciate it.
Comment from wordsfromsue
No, I think you recorded my husband and me getting ready for an evening out!
Isn't it funny how things change as we get older and we sound lime, oh dear, our parents?!
Maybe it's just me.
Quite an enjoyable dialog piece. :-)
reply by the author on 08-Jan-2018
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No, I think you recorded my husband and me getting ready for an evening out!
Isn't it funny how things change as we get older and we sound lime, oh dear, our parents?!
Maybe it's just me.
Quite an enjoyable dialog piece. :-)
Comment Written 08-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 08-Jan-2018
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Thank you for your review and kind words. I am so glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from RodG
I am sure many married FanStorians will hear themselves in this edchange. The bickering is so typical and, of course, the other spouse should be blamed. This made me chuckle.
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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I am sure many married FanStorians will hear themselves in this edchange. The bickering is so typical and, of course, the other spouse should be blamed. This made me chuckle.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Thank you so much for your review and kind words. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Thirty-one-years of wedded bliss.
Wow, Daniel! That's a very rare feat in this day and age.
I made it almost 22 years before my wife decided she'd had enough then headed for "greener pastures" elsewhere.
Such is life...
This story is very believably written as I have experienced being involved in a conversation much like this myself a time or two.
I noticed no errors or anything I would change.
Well done.
Best of luck!
~Dean
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
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Thirty-one-years of wedded bliss.
Wow, Daniel! That's a very rare feat in this day and age.
I made it almost 22 years before my wife decided she'd had enough then headed for "greener pastures" elsewhere.
Such is life...
This story is very believably written as I have experienced being involved in a conversation much like this myself a time or two.
I noticed no errors or anything I would change.
Well done.
Best of luck!
~Dean
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
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Thank you very much for your review and appreciate you looking for errors. Have a great day.
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Sure.
You do the same.
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Daniel: interesting story. Guys and gals are different in directions.
People are busy and drawers and closets get forgotten. Maybe, have
a declutter date at home. Funny dialogue. flylikeaneagle - nancy
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
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Daniel: interesting story. Guys and gals are different in directions.
People are busy and drawers and closets get forgotten. Maybe, have
a declutter date at home. Funny dialogue. flylikeaneagle - nancy
Comment Written 04-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
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Thank you so much for your review and critique. I really appreciate it.
Comment from F. Wehr3
I could relate to this back and forth between husband and wife. I've been married almost twenty years. I found a couple of things for your consideration.
"We've got plenty of time, we don't have to be there until six."--You could argue that the first sentence doesn't complete the thought, but my take is that these are two complete sentences. Suggest a semi-colon after time instead of a comma.
"I haven't worn it in at least two weeks, it should be hanging up in here."--Same as above.
"Well, I didn't see it."
"Dagnabbit!"
"Now what?"--I lost the speaker here. Did Jen break a shoe lace or did you? If it's you, recommend putting Dagnabbit in the previous paragraph.
Then, you make a right, and then a left, and then I think it's the first house on the left.
Oh, there it is! That's it right back there!"--I lost your speaker again. Giving directions sounded like Jen.
Good luck in the contest,
Russell
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
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I could relate to this back and forth between husband and wife. I've been married almost twenty years. I found a couple of things for your consideration.
"We've got plenty of time, we don't have to be there until six."--You could argue that the first sentence doesn't complete the thought, but my take is that these are two complete sentences. Suggest a semi-colon after time instead of a comma.
"I haven't worn it in at least two weeks, it should be hanging up in here."--Same as above.
"Well, I didn't see it."
"Dagnabbit!"
"Now what?"--I lost the speaker here. Did Jen break a shoe lace or did you? If it's you, recommend putting Dagnabbit in the previous paragraph.
Then, you make a right, and then a left, and then I think it's the first house on the left.
Oh, there it is! That's it right back there!"--I lost your speaker again. Giving directions sounded like Jen.
Good luck in the contest,
Russell
Comment Written 04-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
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Thank you very much for your review and critique. I will definitely go back in and see what I can do with that. I appreciate your comments. Thank you.
Comment from oliver818
Nice story. This is a very typical scene, i can just imagine it happening. It's a good entry for the dialogue only competition. Thanks for sharing this and best of luck with the competition!
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2018
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Nice story. This is a very typical scene, i can just imagine it happening. It's a good entry for the dialogue only competition. Thanks for sharing this and best of luck with the competition!
Comment Written 03-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2018
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Thank you very much for your review and kind words. I truly appreciate it.
