A Very Short Tail
Prose Contest Entry4 total reviews
Comment from Brigitte Elko
This was an excellently written story with the disguise revealed in the ending. The author used this prompt with expertise in capturing the reader. There is nothing to change in this entry, it is perfect. It has my vote.
Good luck in the contest.
Happy New Year,
Brigitte
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2017
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This was an excellently written story with the disguise revealed in the ending. The author used this prompt with expertise in capturing the reader. There is nothing to change in this entry, it is perfect. It has my vote.
Good luck in the contest.
Happy New Year,
Brigitte
Comment Written 29-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2017
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Brigitte, I couldn't ask for a better or more timely review. Your outstanding comments, and of course that sixer are even more rewarding than you could have known. The sixer will nullify a four from someone who picked the story to pieces because of its improbability.
A most sincere thank you!
P.S. I just tried to award you a reviewing nomination, but the system blocked it because I had reached the six per month allotment. Rats!
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I bet who I know who gave the four,lol. I loved it! No worries on the nomination.
Happy New Year,
Brigitte
Comment from MSJVClarke
This is a very nice story. I can envision the crouching cat and the trembling butterfly underneath the costume. It was certainly a unique and humorous way to surprise us with the butterfly.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2017
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This is a very nice story. I can envision the crouching cat and the trembling butterfly underneath the costume. It was certainly a unique and humorous way to surprise us with the butterfly.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2017
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Thank you for your insightful and appreciative comments, MSJV!
Wishing you a happy, healthy 2018!
Don
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
A butterfly disguised as an eagle to avoid trouble from a bobcat? Sorry, but this does not work. A bobcat will not bother a butterfly, and a believable eagle costume would be thousands of times too heavy and too huge for a butterfly to use, assuming the butterfly could make or find such a thing. The writing was fine, but the concept and plot was not. Sorry.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2017
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A butterfly disguised as an eagle to avoid trouble from a bobcat? Sorry, but this does not work. A bobcat will not bother a butterfly, and a believable eagle costume would be thousands of times too heavy and too huge for a butterfly to use, assuming the butterfly could make or find such a thing. The writing was fine, but the concept and plot was not. Sorry.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2017
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Phyllis, those obviously unlikely elements you criticize are intentional, and explained early in this fable-like story. It's magic. When undertaking this kind storytelling, one expects readers to suspend disbelief. If they didn't, many works superior to mine, never would have been written.
In this case, the point was made that the timid protagonist doesn't understand where her boldness came from , but she's been given the gumption to take advantage of it. The bobcat wasn't attacking the butterfly. She saw him first, and challenged him. The image of a butterfly throwing off a huge eagle costume was supposed to be ironic and amusing. (It was, to another reviewer, who loved the ending butterfly surprise, and picturing her in the costume.
Comment from Mistydawn
This is a cute story about your cat, very well-written entertaining, suspenseful, nice description, making it easy for the reader to picture the scenario in their mind. Good luck on your contest.
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This is a cute story about your cat, very well-written entertaining, suspenseful, nice description, making it easy for the reader to picture the scenario in their mind. Good luck on your contest.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2017
