Reviews from

Generation Gap?

A bit hard of hearing.

33 total reviews 
Comment from Sis Cat
Excellent
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This is a great, humorous dialogue only write which reminded me of some conversations I have had. You pushed the misunderstandings between an old, hard of hearing woman and a young, not paying attention mechanic. This create a hilarious comedy of errors with choices lines such as these:

I can come over and jump you.

What, you pervert. How dare you suggest such a thing? I'm old enough to be your great-grandmother.

You ratchet up the comedy with these lines:

I meant your car, I will come jump your car.

Well, I never....why on earth would you want to hump my car? It might be interesting to watch, but I can't see how it will get my car started.

You rally your poem to a laugh out loud ending as if this was a standup routine of a comic:

I want to take a good look at that humper cable thingy. There wasn't anything like that back in my day. If that humper cable can bring my old car back to life, maybe it can do something for me too.  

This is a spectacular dialogue only story. I only suggest you use a period and a capital letter to separate this run on sentence:

quit calling me ma'am(. I)t makes me feel ancient.

Thank you for sharing. I wish you contest success.

 Comment Written 10-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 11-Nov-2017
    Thanks for reading and your tip. I will edit and fix that sentence. So glad you enjoyed the story.
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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Lol! This was very cute and got me chuckling several times! Yes, those hearing problems can sure lead to all kinds of humorous misunderstanding. But I think I'd send someone else to show her the "humper cables" - preferably a woman mechanic.

 Comment Written 10-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 11-Nov-2017
    Thanks. Yep, I like your suggestion. LOL It was a fun story to write.
Comment from doggymad
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was just so funny. Hearing loos can be difficult but the ability to laugh at the mistakes you make can help in certain situation.

This conversation is typical of something that could happen here is our small town where double entendre is an acceptable form of communication

hugs

Freda

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 11-Nov-2017
    Thanks. I can relate to this story as it is hard for me to understand conversations on the phone. Also, I'm definitely and elder at age 71. LOL
Comment from Bob Stanton
Excellent
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Not bad. I was looking and hoping for some more misinterpretations and perhaps a spoonerism or two. A bit of fun though and made me smile.
Thank you and good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    Thanks for reading and commenting. I could be that old lady on the phone. I can't hear too well when conversing on the phone.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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Just loved the humour you've used in this dialogue only short work. You had me virtually laughing out loud, and nearly waking my wife up. Excellent narrative about a daft, deaf old so and so, and a concerned, younger man, with an unappreciated sense of humour. Great entry, good luck,

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    That daft, deaf old dear is me. LOL I can not understand conversations on the phone. I have the volume turned clear up on mine too.
reply by royowen on 09-Nov-2017
    Hah hah, great entry.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
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That is so funny, but OMG, it could be me on the end of the phone! LOL, I'm always getting the words wrong and putting my foot in it. That's the trouble with aging. Not fair. I loved this, we should all laugh at our boobs, (as in mistakes lol) Oh, and if you do have some spare humper leads, I'll email you my address! LOL Good luck in the contest, this is a brilliant entry, I'd give you a 6 if I had one. :) Sandra xxx

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    Yeah, me too. That's where I got the idea for the story. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Comment from Mustang Patty
Excellent
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Wow. If that's the kind of stuff you wake up to, well, your imagination must be working overtime. Well done and a great entry for the Dialogue only contest,

~patty~

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    Thanks for reading and commenting. Actually, that deaf old lady is probably me. LOL
Comment from Sharon Haiste
Excellent
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An excellent Dialogue Only entry. It's not easy to present a story with details using only dialogue. I know I've tried and failed. But not giving up.
Well done.
Good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I enjoy these dialogue only contests. I can relate to this story too as I'm 71 and heading for 72 in a hurry.
Comment from Teri7
Excellent
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This is a very cute and very funny dialogue entry for the contest. You used very cute descriptive wording and very good imagery with the picture of that little old lady that was perfect for your words. Best wishes in the contest. Teri

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. I had fun writing this.
Comment from RodG
Excellent
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Okay, part of me takes umbrage like Mrs. Palaskey because I, too, am hearing impaired and have difficulty on the phone. On the other hand, I chuckled out loud while reading this because I could easily hear this conversation. Great job of characterizing both the repairman and the elderly woman through dialog. It's interesting to imagine their conversation once he arrives with jumper cables.

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
    I hear you. (pun) I don't hear too well on the phone either. I'm always saying, "What?" when talking to someone. Some young folks do make jokes at the expense of the elderly.