The Waffle House
Running into a lost love.25 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
Enjoyable story as we can all relate to as two people meet with the happy memories of a "might-have-been" relationship in high school. I like that he remembered that he was hungry and got his pancakes!
one grammar comment - it's an area I have to watch in my writing:
" I slide out of the booth to my feet and we begin getting the low down on our pass"
(slid, began) Up until this point all the other verbs were in past tense.
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Enjoyable story as we can all relate to as two people meet with the happy memories of a "might-have-been" relationship in high school. I like that he remembered that he was hungry and got his pancakes!
one grammar comment - it's an area I have to watch in my writing:
" I slide out of the booth to my feet and we begin getting the low down on our pass"
(slid, began) Up until this point all the other verbs were in past tense.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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You always come through for me. One day I will get a perfect piece without errors but it won't be in the near future.
Phillip
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I'm learning, too. That's why we're here! Blessings.
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When I started this site, I never envisioned the quality of people helping me. You are a blessing.
Phillip
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So kind of you to say! Thanks. I am blessed by being here, too. It's was hard at first to share writing and not take critiques personally. But that is how we grow and learn. I finally concede that commas do matter after all! Lol.
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I've grown wiser as a result of being here as well.
Phillip
Comment from B.B. Rose
Well, I guess this is a case of "the more things change, the more they stay the same." I enjoyed how your narrator showed maturity at the end with his acceptance of losing the girl once again, but still wanting the darn pancakes!
Clever story.
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Well, I guess this is a case of "the more things change, the more they stay the same." I enjoyed how your narrator showed maturity at the end with his acceptance of losing the girl once again, but still wanting the darn pancakes!
Clever story.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Thanks for reading, B.B..
Phillip
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
patience
customarily
on our past.
where I could look out the smudged window to see my
that she chose that profession
break in our studying
I sometimes spoke without thinking
Put a space after a period.
Nice recollection of a lost love but pancakes ruled out
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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patience
customarily
on our past.
where I could look out the smudged window to see my
that she chose that profession
break in our studying
I sometimes spoke without thinking
Put a space after a period.
Nice recollection of a lost love but pancakes ruled out
Comment Written 05-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Thanks, greatly, Barb.
Phillip
Comment from Octavia
Wow! Great story, Phillip. The build up and then Wendy is gone again. Some things never change. lol
Great job.
Few spags below.
It takes patents to get a real job (patience)
"Oh. I wear contact lens know." (now)
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Wow! Great story, Phillip. The build up and then Wendy is gone again. Some things never change. lol
Great job.
Few spags below.
It takes patents to get a real job (patience)
"Oh. I wear contact lens know." (now)
Comment Written 05-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Thanks, Octavia. I will make the correction.
Phillip
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A brief memory brought to mind and rekindled that old feeling, I rarely run into my old school friends thee days, but your story reminded me of those times, a joy to read, (First line, I think you mean patience), Love Dolly x
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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A brief memory brought to mind and rekindled that old feeling, I rarely run into my old school friends thee days, but your story reminded me of those times, a joy to read, (First line, I think you mean patience), Love Dolly x
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2017
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Thanks a lot, Dolly. I will make the correction.
Phillip
