Reviews from

Time Well Spent

A Shakesperean Sonnet for My Beloved*

22 total reviews 
Comment from Mara Coy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

The reference of the hourglass in brilliant, "most of ours are in the bottom half" speaks about a whole life together, "gravity can never be reversed" the weight of the memories. I like how it is written because it gives you the taste of a good relationship without giving details, and then the last two lines close the poem with revelation.

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2017


reply by the author on 13-Aug-2017
    Thanks so much for the six and the kind words. This one was for my wife's birthday, so I had to go with the sonnet form for the love poem.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a work of art Mark and I for one believe it should have been the winner. If I had a six it would be yours. It is a lovely sonnet well done and presented. Good job my friend. Nancy

 Comment Written 29-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 01-May-2017
    Thanks so much Nancy for the wonderful review. My wife liked it so the ten member dollars for third place was gravy.
Comment from Joan E.
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your title and the parallel picture drew me into your love sonnet. I admired your alternating rhymes plus "hourglass" and "river" metaphors. Best wishes in the contest- Joan

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
    Thanks Joan. I try to write a sonnet for my wife's birthday every year - this year it happened to coincide with a sonnet contest. Thanks for the kind words
reply by Joan E. on 21-Mar-2017
    Your wife is lucky to receive such a lovely gift each year. Smiles- Joan
Comment from Ideasaregems-Dawn
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I think this has to be one of few pieces by you that wasn't satire or humor, and Mark, your sonnet is so beautiful, romance at its finest - while I love your funny stories, I love this as much. What woman on earth would not want to be told her man has found eternity in her? The form, to me, is meant for writing like this - best of luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2017
    Thanks Dawn - I showed this to Maggie and she seemed to like it. I think, as soon as we can fit it into our schedules, I'm gonna get lucky!
reply by Ideasaregems-Dawn on 15-Mar-2017
    LOL. Oh God, you are such a MAN! Hahahahaha!
Comment from catch22
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is absolutely beautiful and a very accomplished sonnet with natural modern language and use of multi-syllabic words in your iambic meter. You also emply some very clever rhyming like spent and sacrament. This is such a lovely use of metaphor and phrasing I have to award a six. Best of luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2017
    Thank you so much for the kind words and generous rating - much appreciated.
reply by catch22 on 15-Mar-2017
    You're very welcome.
Comment from dragonpoet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A beautiful Shakespearean sonnet of love through time and into eternity.
The turn in the 9th line is very effective in bringing hope and faith into the poem.
I like the metaphors used with river and gravity. Though the sands of time is a little cliche.

Good luck in the contest.

Keep writing

dragonpoet

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2017
    Thanks for he kind review. I actually have an hourglass in my office which is what inspired the poem (well, that and my wife, of course).
reply by dragonpoet on 15-Mar-2017
    You are most kindly welcome. I haven't seen one in a long time. There was one in a board game I used to have.

    Two good inspirations.

    dragon
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
Excellent
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A very well-written Sonnet. When the hourglass is turned over and the sand start s running there is no stopping, every minute we waste is a minute lost forever.

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2017
    Thanks you Sandra. I actually have an hour glass in my office which is what inspired the poem. They are relentless.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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Maggie's gonna love this, Mark.
Heck, even I enjoyed reading it and I'm about as devoid of romance as a guy can get.
Perfect iambic pentameter with the tell-tale volta that all Shakespearean and English sonnets employ coming in your ninth line.
I would have stated third stanza, ninth line, but you've chosen to format with all the lines running together.
The rhyming couplet was the Coup de grace...
Bravo!
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 Comment Written 14-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2017
    Thank you Dean - I seem to remember having seen you post a romantic poem a time or two, so I know you have it in you.
reply by Dean Kuch on 14-Mar-2017
    Yes, perhaps a couple.
    You're very welcome, Mark. :)
Comment from LoannaLois
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh Maggie, Your honey is such a great writer. So many of us on FanStory admire his many gifts to all of us. Since this one is to you, I just wanted to tell you how wonderful it has been these years, hearing about his love, admiration, and respect for you and your family. Some of us have not worn those shoes, so it cheers and gives hope. I wanted to write to tell Mark what a wonderful sonnet this is...and then I decided to tell the one for whom it was written. With friendship, Lois

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2017
    I shall share this with Maggie. She doesn't often visit this site - I think that she imagines that I make fun of her (which I, of course do on occasion) - this will serve as proof that I also sing her praises sometimes.
Comment from Vijay Kumar V
Excellent
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How beautiful. A wonderful sonnet with with a perfect sounding of rhyme. A pretty good imagery with a nice flow. I love these lines a lot ' I do not fret if time is almost through,
Because I found eternity in you' . Have a nice day.

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2017
    Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment on this one. Much appreciated.