Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "You Could Be Good"Assorted poetry
19 total reviews
Comment from Poetic Friend
You get much credit for the letters you chose. Writing in this poetic from wth the last letters and the first letter of the alphabet is very challenging. You executed the form superbly, without the poem sounding forced.
I heard of the xylophone, but I never knew what the instrument looks like until I read your poem.
Good luck in the contest, and Happy New Year!
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2017
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You get much credit for the letters you chose. Writing in this poetic from wth the last letters and the first letter of the alphabet is very challenging. You executed the form superbly, without the poem sounding forced.
I heard of the xylophone, but I never knew what the instrument looks like until I read your poem.
Good luck in the contest, and Happy New Year!
Comment Written 02-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2017
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Thank you, PF, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from Sis Cat
I found this to be, Bill, a fun ABC poem which ends the alphabet with WXYZ and loops around to the beginning with A. Your poem is one about noise because "Without needed and valid credentials" the zylophone teacher, perhaps a sub, attempts to teach. The best the students could do is bang on the instruments. Chaos follows in the music class as "Zebras might sing with a chorus of mice."
This is a fine, humorous entry. Thank you for sharing. i wish you success in the contest.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2017
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I found this to be, Bill, a fun ABC poem which ends the alphabet with WXYZ and loops around to the beginning with A. Your poem is one about noise because "Without needed and valid credentials" the zylophone teacher, perhaps a sub, attempts to teach. The best the students could do is bang on the instruments. Chaos follows in the music class as "Zebras might sing with a chorus of mice."
This is a fine, humorous entry. Thank you for sharing. i wish you success in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2017
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Thank you, Andre, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from rama devi
Bravo for tackling the toughest letters, WXYZ and I like how it loops back to A in the last line. I like how you have bonus rhyming and the rhyme pair of credentials and essentials is fresh and innovative. Well done! Fine consonance of S in all lines. Fine alliteration of C and M. Fine satirical overtone. Love the presentation too.
Good luck in the contest. Happy New Year!
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2017
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Bravo for tackling the toughest letters, WXYZ and I like how it loops back to A in the last line. I like how you have bonus rhyming and the rhyme pair of credentials and essentials is fresh and innovative. Well done! Fine consonance of S in all lines. Fine alliteration of C and M. Fine satirical overtone. Love the presentation too.
Good luck in the contest. Happy New Year!
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 02-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2017
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Thank you, RD, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from Chrissy710
Hi Bill,, Ha Ha couldn't go past this one and the good old Zebra often get a mention in an ABC poem a difficult letter to come up with but you have done a splendid job and I hope you do well in the contest good luck this made me chuckle , Cheers Christine
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2016
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Hi Bill,, Ha Ha couldn't go past this one and the good old Zebra often get a mention in an ABC poem a difficult letter to come up with but you have done a splendid job and I hope you do well in the contest good luck this made me chuckle , Cheers Christine
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Christine, for the fun review. Bill
Comment from nancyrabbrose
Your ABC poem is excellent. I can almost hear the music. I don't understand the "clones" part. I guess I am a bit dense tonight -- not your fault. It is a clever poem and I wish you luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Your ABC poem is excellent. I can almost hear the music. I don't understand the "clones" part. I guess I am a bit dense tonight -- not your fault. It is a clever poem and I wish you luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Nancy, for the excellent review. I figure if I were my own audience I might get some applause.
Comment from Irish Rain
Ha ha....I love to read happy, or cute poems!! This is a clever ABC, using the very hardest letters!!! I wouldn't even attempt 'Z'. Good luck, Happy New Year!!!!
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Ha ha....I love to read happy, or cute poems!! This is a clever ABC, using the very hardest letters!!! I wouldn't even attempt 'Z'. Good luck, Happy New Year!!!!
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Judy, for the great review. Bill
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Wouldn't it be great to perform for an audience of your clones? Everything you did would be perfect. The only criticism would be, why did it end so soon.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Wouldn't it be great to perform for an audience of your clones? Everything you did would be perfect. The only criticism would be, why did it end so soon.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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My clones would be tied to their seats. They'd insist on it.
Comment from EricBrady
Great entry for the contest Bill. Excellent rhyming and a little humor to boot. That's always a good thing. Love the Z line, that would be a sight. Best wishes and have a Happy New Year. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Great entry for the contest Bill. Excellent rhyming and a little humor to boot. That's always a good thing. Love the Z line, that would be a sight. Best wishes and have a Happy New Year. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Eric, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
This is fresh,fun and fantastic!What a useless device the Xylo is!Only thing worse is the tambourine or triangle.I always got stuck with it at school!This is a great write and one to be proud of well done I loved the last line particularly.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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This is fresh,fun and fantastic!What a useless device the Xylo is!Only thing worse is the tambourine or triangle.I always got stuck with it at school!This is a great write and one to be proud of well done I loved the last line particularly.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Thank you, mesayers, for the terrific review. Bill
Comment from Pantygynt
Oh Bill how disappointing. Not a word over three syllables. Couldn't the xylophone teacher have had a polysyllabic name like so many of your wonderful characters. He could have been a Hungarian with a name that began with a Z like Zoltan.
Don't worry, this is all a joke. I loved it really.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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Oh Bill how disappointing. Not a word over three syllables. Couldn't the xylophone teacher have had a polysyllabic name like so many of your wonderful characters. He could have been a Hungarian with a name that began with a Z like Zoltan.
Don't worry, this is all a joke. I loved it really.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2016
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I hadn't thought to go off the rails too far with this format. I am in the mood to put together another character. Thank you for the neat review. Bill
