HAPPY DAYS at the Corner Store
Sweet memories from my childhood7 total reviews
Comment from CammyCards
You really have a good memory to remember all the goodies of which you partook. The rhythm is good, except I wished the "Happy Days" line had the same number of syllable (6) ass all the shorter lines. Even just adding "Such" before happy days would not make a break in the rhythm. Thank you for using my picture to illustrate your nice poem.
CammyCards
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2016
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You really have a good memory to remember all the goodies of which you partook. The rhythm is good, except I wished the "Happy Days" line had the same number of syllable (6) ass all the shorter lines. Even just adding "Such" before happy days would not make a break in the rhythm. Thank you for using my picture to illustrate your nice poem.
CammyCards
Comment Written 04-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2016
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Thank you for your suggestions and review.
Comment from wilkswrites
Awwwww-- I remember squirrel nuts. Can't eat those suckers now, with two new crowns just put in my head. Thank you for bringing back this memory of the "Corner Store." I do miss purchasing 10 stale cookies (I love stale cookies to this day) for just a dime. Or a bag of potato chips for 10 cents (before they filled them up with air). Remember the drakes cakes were actually made with real just black very shiny chocolate???? OMG, I really miss those days. Thank you
Well-written by the way. I feel that your rhyme scheme started strong, but then began to taper off. Any reason for that?
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
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Awwwww-- I remember squirrel nuts. Can't eat those suckers now, with two new crowns just put in my head. Thank you for bringing back this memory of the "Corner Store." I do miss purchasing 10 stale cookies (I love stale cookies to this day) for just a dime. Or a bag of potato chips for 10 cents (before they filled them up with air). Remember the drakes cakes were actually made with real just black very shiny chocolate???? OMG, I really miss those days. Thank you
Well-written by the way. I feel that your rhyme scheme started strong, but then began to taper off. Any reason for that?
Comment Written 03-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
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Thanks so much for the positive feedback. So glad you shared some of the same memories! Wrote the poem minutes before the deadline! Hence, the weak ending. But I had fun!
Comment from pharp
Excellent job in the penning of this good oh days poem. I can relate and remember running to the corner store when grandma would come to visit and give us money. I remember reading the comic books and oh how I wished I had save them. Your poem is beautifully written giving very descriptive accounts of the good old day in your life. Thanks for sharing a very smooth and enjoyable read. The very best to you in the contest. Blessings.................Portia
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
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Excellent job in the penning of this good oh days poem. I can relate and remember running to the corner store when grandma would come to visit and give us money. I remember reading the comic books and oh how I wished I had save them. Your poem is beautifully written giving very descriptive accounts of the good old day in your life. Thanks for sharing a very smooth and enjoyable read. The very best to you in the contest. Blessings.................Portia
Comment Written 03-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
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Many thanks for your positive feedback. Glad someone else had similar sweet memories!
Comment from winnona
Well written poem. A good contest entry. I think you did well completing the challenge of the contest. Your well-chosen words flow easily line to line forming the message of the poem for the reader.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
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Well written poem. A good contest entry. I think you did well completing the challenge of the contest. Your well-chosen words flow easily line to line forming the message of the poem for the reader.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
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Thank you very much!
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Your poem took me back to my childhood. I remember getting a weekly allowance of a dime, which I had to earn by helping my mother clean the house. Every Saturday when I got that dime, I would either spend it on an ice-cream treat from the Yummy-Man or I would go to the corner store and spend it on a bag of candy. Yes "simple pleasures meant a lot" ... SO true!
I enjoyed reading your fine entry for the contest! Good luck in the contest!
bichonfrisegirl
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2016
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Your poem took me back to my childhood. I remember getting a weekly allowance of a dime, which I had to earn by helping my mother clean the house. Every Saturday when I got that dime, I would either spend it on an ice-cream treat from the Yummy-Man or I would go to the corner store and spend it on a bag of candy. Yes "simple pleasures meant a lot" ... SO true!
I enjoyed reading your fine entry for the contest! Good luck in the contest!
bichonfrisegirl
Comment Written 01-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2016
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Thank you for your positive thoughts!
Comment from tfawcus
Although many of the names of these candies are not familiar, the essence of your poem is! A penny was worth something in those days! LOL
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2016
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Although many of the names of these candies are not familiar, the essence of your poem is! A penny was worth something in those days! LOL
Comment Written 01-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2016
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Thank you for the positive feedback!
Comment from William Ross
Nicely done on good old days prompt. A nicely written free verse. I remember those days that are lost forever, today it's 2 bucks or better for candy bar. good luck on this and have a great day.
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2016
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Nicely done on good old days prompt. A nicely written free verse. I remember those days that are lost forever, today it's 2 bucks or better for candy bar. good luck on this and have a great day.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this!
