Minnesota Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 67 "New Stadium"Poems About and Around Minnesota
14 total reviews
Comment from Nottoway
I like the styling of this poem and the way you have used the last words of some lines to lead into the thought/message of the next line.
Very well done and I do hope the Vikings can gain some success. I remember all the way back to the Purple People Eater days and the success the teams had. It is a shame they have not been able to lift the ultimate trophy yet.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2016
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I like the styling of this poem and the way you have used the last words of some lines to lead into the thought/message of the next line.
Very well done and I do hope the Vikings can gain some success. I remember all the way back to the Purple People Eater days and the success the teams had. It is a shame they have not been able to lift the ultimate trophy yet.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2016
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Thank you Nottiway. I appreciate your review. I love your sentiment towards the Vikings. I suffered with them since their very first game.
Comment from Joan E.
You are obviously back from vacation! My husband says your taxpayers are ponying up for half the cost of the stadium--eeek!! I enjoyed your internal and end rhymes plus echoes in these quatrains, along with your photo of the "architecture" "bracketed in sculptured glass"--impressive. Cheers- Joan
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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You are obviously back from vacation! My husband says your taxpayers are ponying up for half the cost of the stadium--eeek!! I enjoyed your internal and end rhymes plus echoes in these quatrains, along with your photo of the "architecture" "bracketed in sculptured glass"--impressive. Cheers- Joan
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you Joan. Yup, it true, but at least the Billionare owner ponied up the other half.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Wow! That is some stadium! Very futuristic in design I think. Excellent Echo poem. I have always intended to write one but never really set out to do it. You did a wonderful job Tom. Good luck to your Vikings. Nancy
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Wow! That is some stadium! Very futuristic in design I think. Excellent Echo poem. I have always intended to write one but never really set out to do it. You did a wonderful job Tom. Good luck to your Vikings. Nancy
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you Nancy. Yup, go Vikes!
Comment from TAB_that's me
That is quite a stadium! I'm not a football fan - did your Vikings win? I hope so.
All that money though - oh my. We could feed all the homeless for a year or more on that.
teresa
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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That is quite a stadium! I'm not a football fan - did your Vikings win? I hope so.
All that money though - oh my. We could feed all the homeless for a year or more on that.
teresa
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you Teresa, yes, they did win!
Comment from Preston McWhorter
;Hi, Treischel,
"New Stadium" is an excellent paen to a new colesseum devoted to a modern American form of combat. It successfully uses a creative and unusual structural form and rhyme scheme. Its figurative language is good with a fresh metaphor ":whose acclaim acclaims its equilibrium."
Your friend and colleague.
Preston
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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;Hi, Treischel,
"New Stadium" is an excellent paen to a new colesseum devoted to a modern American form of combat. It successfully uses a creative and unusual structural form and rhyme scheme. Its figurative language is good with a fresh metaphor ":whose acclaim acclaims its equilibrium."
Your friend and colleague.
Preston
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you Preston. I'm sure that it now rivals the one in Dallas. Glad you liked it.
Comment from robyn corum
THAT is one crazy stadium! I've never seen anything like it, and imagine it must have cost at least 3 or 4 dollars. At LEAST. *smile* I DO SO love Minneapolis. I want to get back there sometime sooooon. Thanks for this poem -- so nice to see you again!
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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THAT is one crazy stadium! I've never seen anything like it, and imagine it must have cost at least 3 or 4 dollars. At LEAST. *smile* I DO SO love Minneapolis. I want to get back there sometime sooooon. Thanks for this poem -- so nice to see you again!
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you Robyn. There is nothing like it anywhere. It gives the impression of being outside with all that glass, but fans wil never be rained or snowed on. Plus, the giant wall swing open to let in fresh air when the weather is nice. I wish it wasn't so expensive to go to a game though. It definitely worth a visit.
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Thank you Robyn. There is nothing like it anywhere. It gives the impression of being outside with all that glass, but fans wil never be rained or snowed on. Plus, the giant wall swing open to let in fresh air when the weather is nice. I wish it wasn't so expensive to go to a game though. It definitely worth a visit.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
It looks an amazing building, Tom, and I know how Americans love their football, it's different to ours. I've always wondered why you call it football when you throw it to one another. We call it football and kick the ball. Just wondered if there was a story behind it. I enjoyed your echo poem, and thought how easily it echoed from line to line, I didn't realise until I was almost halfway through it, that it was intentional. It is the perfect poem to go with the amazing new stadium you have. :) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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It looks an amazing building, Tom, and I know how Americans love their football, it's different to ours. I've always wondered why you call it football when you throw it to one another. We call it football and kick the ball. Just wondered if there was a story behind it. I enjoyed your echo poem, and thought how easily it echoed from line to line, I didn't realise until I was almost halfway through it, that it was intentional. It is the perfect poem to go with the amazing new stadium you have. :) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you Sandra, for a wonderful review. About the only explanation I have is, that the ball is about a foot long, the game starts with a kickoff, and we kick an extra point after each touchdown.
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Thank you, now if anyone mentions that in front of me, I will be able to come up with an answer! It sounds reasonable to me. :) xx
Comment from patcelaw
This is an interesting format, and informative to me. I did not know there was a new stadium as I have no TV and have not kept up with sports, BTW who won the game last night? Patricia
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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This is an interesting format, and informative to me. I did not know there was a new stadium as I have no TV and have not kept up with sports, BTW who won the game last night? Patricia
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thanks Patricia. The Vikings won 17-14.
Comment from Pantygynt
This form puzzles me. I can understand what is being attempted but I wonder why. It may be that when I have seen it previously it as worked on something other than a simple repeat of the sound. In a narrative style such as this it does not seem to have any great poetic merit. I think the style might work better in a more reflective poem. There is something eerie in the is dea of an echo a sound that is generated by itself so to speak.
I imagine that the insertion of minor changes such as the insertion of indefite aticles are in order.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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This form puzzles me. I can understand what is being attempted but I wonder why. It may be that when I have seen it previously it as worked on something other than a simple repeat of the sound. In a narrative style such as this it does not seem to have any great poetic merit. I think the style might work better in a more reflective poem. There is something eerie in the is dea of an echo a sound that is generated by itself so to speak.
I imagine that the insertion of minor changes such as the insertion of indefite aticles are in order.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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To the American football fan, this would be a very reflective poem. Maybe you need to view it as a Soccer, Rugby, Cricket, or Tennis venue. I heard the cheers echo loudly last night after our victory, so I though an echo very appropriate in a stadium. Did you catch the double meaning that I used in the word "pass?" Not sure what you mean by inserting indefinite articles here.
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I know what an indefinite article is, I just don't see where an "a" or "an" would benefit either the meter or the content.
Sorry I didn't make myself clear. The echo format requires you repeat the last word of one line at the start of the next. But here you have inserted the "an"
"acclaims great equilibrium.
An equilibrium to team,"
And here an "A"
"display of border rivalry.
A rivalry on new home field."
All I was saying was I didn't suppose such minor deviations from the rule mattered.
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Oh, I see. Yes, the echo doesn't have to be the first word as long as it's at the beginning of the line.
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Sorry no, missed that. I'm not doing very well today am I? Lol.
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RIght. I see. Thanks
Comment from DonandVicki
I don't follow sports that much but your double echo poem caught my attention. I have never seem this style before and you have inspired me to give it a try.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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I don't follow sports that much but your double echo poem caught my attention. I have never seem this style before and you have inspired me to give it a try.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2016
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Thank you DonaldandVicky.
