Reviews from

A Poem To My Dead Sister

Writing the pain away

41 total reviews 
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
Excellent
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Amahra,
This is such a heartbreaking poem. I hope you read it aloud because your sister can hear you now. I'm sure she now also wishes she had acknowledged you as her sister. We all make so many mistakes and have so many regrets and then we are gone.
The text could be a bit larger, and a photo of your sister would be good too. Thanks for sharing this poem.

 Comment Written 18-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
    Thank you for choosing to read this one. I really appreciate it. I'll try to revise and find a picture of her. But it will never be longer because I said the things I needed to say. Again, thank you.
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 18-Oct-2022
    I meant the size of the text could be larger. The poem is great as it is. You are welcome.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
    Ok, got it! I bold and enlarged the font. Thank you for your suggestion.
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 19-Oct-2022
    You are most welcome. Read my poem "Back Away from the Brink" on page 3 of my portfolio.
Comment from June Sargent
Excellent
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Such a beautiful and poignant tribute to your sister. Cancer is such a scourge. I have lost not only my mom, but also 2 dear friends to the disease. Writing does help ease the pain of loss. Main reason why I joined Fanstory. Thank you for your encouraging feedback on my dragonfly poem. I won first prize, along with 2 other members!

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2017
    LOL Finally, I voted for the winner. You deserved it.
Comment from pharp
Excellent
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I am so sorry for your loss, I lost my oldest sister to suicide at the early age of 38 and another sister to the dreaded disease of Lupus in 2010. The sister who died from complications of Lupus was a poet and penned some beautiful poetry. I never had the desire to write anything, but since her death I have been unable to put the pen down, I write from my heart whatever the Lord lay upon it. I could feel the love you have for your sister in this lovely poem. Thanks for sharing. Blessings..................Portia

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
    Thank you so much. What a heart-felt review.
Comment from Mastery
Excellent
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Hello, my friend. sorry for your loss. Excellent memoriam of sorts for her.

"I follow you along the boardwalk near the beach in
Atlantic City.
We exchange secrets.
Mama loves you more.
But we ignore her...this time."


Sorry for your loss. X Bob

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you bob.
Comment from Spiritual Echo
Excellent
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I think we all would like to rewrite our relationships. Perhaps that's why I like fiction, I can create my own happy endings.

I'm sorry you lost your sister to such a horrible disease. Hopefully you still have a relationship with her children.

Beautifully written, a fitting tribute.

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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What a really sad poem, Amahra, to have lost your sister is hard enough, but you feel you could have both spoken more to each other. That is a natural feeling. I often think of my late mother and wish I had said more to her. But, I know deep down, they knew what we felt for them, words sometimes don't say exactly what we want to say, but they do come across in a strange way. I'm so sorry for your loss and wish you the best of luck in the contest. xsx Sandra

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you so much.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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This is certainly one way to kill a bird with two stones, amahra, if you'll pardon the expression.
Not only have you managed to write a beautiful, poignant poetic ode to your dearly departed sister, whom you obviously loved very much, but you've also used the poem as an entry in the upcoming free verse contest as well.
Best of luck.
~Dean

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you Dean.
Comment from l.raven
Excellent
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HI Amahra, I know how you feel...my sister has had it for times...and the doctors can't believe she is still here...I am so sorry for your lose...and it is wonderful to imagine her here...and one day you will be with her again...and you can walk that boardwalk with her...keep writing...she can see you...very nicely written...love Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you so much Linda.
reply by l.raven on 19-Jul-2016
    you are so welcome sweet girl...xxoo Linda love
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Suicide is hard. I use to think about suicide but I don't anymore and I'm so thankful but I understand the loneliness. And to have cancer and other health issues. My heart hurts and I'm so sorry but I do hope writing this helped you. You might want to put the suicide prevention hotline number in the comments with something saying how if you're reading this and thinking about taking your own life that you are so much more. You never know who is reading this and who you might help

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you so much for the review and many stars.
Comment from djeckert
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

this is really raw, and heart wrenching and quite beautiful. I really loved it. I bet it is somewhat therapeutic for you also. Very touching and the last few lines probably say more than well ever know. God Surely blesses you and your writing.

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
    Thank you so much. I really appreciate your review.