Comment from BeasPeas

Excellent

A well written Quinzaine. Good question raised here. Yes, we must always have our captain at the helm to guide and keep us safe. Timely and appropriate in all situations. Great job. Marilyn

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 16-Jul-2016

Three reviews for the price of one, I see - thank you so much.

Steve

reply by BeasPeas on 17-Jul-2016

I get on a roll when something appeals to me.

Comment from MissMerri

Exceptional

Finally! A Quinzaine that is readable and sensible, and still seems like a poem. I have read so many of these, and disliked most of them, so for that reason, among others, I feel compelled to grant this six stars. Oh... and the contest committee must have liked it too. Congratulations for winning the second place ribbon. That's especially telling, considering how many entries there were. ;p

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 06-Jul-2016

Thanks, Adonna.

Most of these very short forms are hard to do anything with. This one was next to impossible of you had to have two questions, so I bucked the trend and followed Warren Rodgers' lead, with just one. That made all the difference, and the committee obviously gave it the tick of approval. Rama's one was clever as well.

Steve

Comment from Sasha

Excellent

I am new to this style although I have read several entries for this contest. I like yours very much and do not see why there need be two questions when you have used one across two lines. Great work with this one and I wish you all the best in the contest too.

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Thanks, Sasha.

I certainly like it better this way!

Steve

Comment from Lisa Deverick

Excellent

Cool interpretation on the Quinzaine...please let me know if that is acceptable (to use line 2 and 3 to pose one question) I wrote my first one last month- they are fun.

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Thanks, Lisa.

I guess the only feedback I will get is whether or not it places in the contest...

Steve

Comment from Marykelly

Excellent

This poem seems quite metaphorical to me. Humankind seems battered by ill winds of social, political, moral differences and in the midst of danger the captain abandons ship, which suggests to me the need for a new leader to take the wheel or the need for each individual to save himself.

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Thanks, Mary.

Yesp, pretty much everything serious that I write is open to metaphorical interpretation. Could be political, spiritual or perhaps just that my wife's out of the house for the day!

Steve

Comment from Pam (respa)

Excellent

-I really like the image of the ship.
-Very well written Quinzaine.
-From your thread and looking for definitions of the form, it would seem that either way of posing the questions is acceptable.
-Very effective first line with good imagery.
-The question is poignant and is open to the imagination as to why he did leave the helm.
-Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Thank you for this thoughtful response.

Steve

reply by Pam (respa) on 02-Jul-2016

You are welcome.

Comment from rspoet

Excellent

This is a fine entry for this strange form
Excellent statement in first line
and intriguing question that follows
Why indeed?
My understanding is there may be one or two questions
so this meets the requirements perfectly
Excellent art work to match
Well done
Good luck in the crowded contest

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Strange form indeed. Very little information on it, so I'm guessing it's a recently invented form. Sometimes I think the site casts its net too wide looking for variety in the contests.

Steve

Comment from G.B. Smith

Exceptional

Hey there Steve
Raging storm engulfs our ship.
Why has the captain
left the helm?
In my world, He has left us to see how well we handle our free agency. My mother used to say, "Everyone has the right to remain stupid and sometimes we tend to exercise our rights too often. I love the artwork chosen
Bear

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Hi, Bear - haven't seen you around for a while.

I'm pleased you read between the lines of my little poem - Your Mom was obviously a very wise woman.

Now I just have to see whether the committee will accept my version...

Steve

Comment from cterp

Excellent

Yup, you're right. Nothing says it has to be two questions, just that the next two lines have to ask a question. And most of us have blindly followed the example. You, my friend, have opened new waters. Why, indeed, has the captain left the helm? e must be missing a question mark!

Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016

Thank you. Actually, I am following the example set by Warren Rodgers, who did the same thing.

I actually think this format makes more sense - it was next to impossible to get anything meaningful the other way.

Steve

Comment from Joy Graham

Excellent

That would be a good question lol! I'd be a little concerned to be a passenger on that ship and the captain has left his station. I feel sea sick just thinking about it. Hope there aren't sharks in that water. Best wishes in this contest. You have a terrific contest entry here.

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016

Thanks, Joy.

Almost as alarming as seeing your pilot referring to a manual called 'How to Fly'!

Steve