haiku (three herons wait)
Lakeside buffet39 total reviews
Comment from Lovinia
LOL What an image! This is sensational dear One, highlighting your great talent at these. The image would have been lovely to see, however your haiku does complete a perfect image on its own. Great word use with "wait" and "patience", the perfect satori to give a giggle, the AHA can hold movement or a still life image and can take your reader into a magic moment. Haiku means 'fun', as you know and here you have captured the essence of that. The crispness of the assonance and consonance provides a solid impact on the intensity, yet freedom of your image, a subtle touch of alliteration in the satori is very effective. Great work and congratulations, in the winner's circle, an excellent committee decision...wonderful to see Lois in the line up ... brings back all the golden memories of POHM. Huge hugs - Lovi xoxo
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2016
  |
LOL What an image! This is sensational dear One, highlighting your great talent at these. The image would have been lovely to see, however your haiku does complete a perfect image on its own. Great word use with "wait" and "patience", the perfect satori to give a giggle, the AHA can hold movement or a still life image and can take your reader into a magic moment. Haiku means 'fun', as you know and here you have captured the essence of that. The crispness of the assonance and consonance provides a solid impact on the intensity, yet freedom of your image, a subtle touch of alliteration in the satori is very effective. Great work and congratulations, in the winner's circle, an excellent committee decision...wonderful to see Lois in the line up ... brings back all the golden memories of POHM. Huge hugs - Lovi xoxo
Comment Written 06-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2016
-
Oh, Lovi, you have me smiling and you've given me a warm feeling in my heart. Thank you so much for your wonderdul review, encouraging comments, and very generous rating for my haiku. I'm delighted you enjoyed the imagery and found the humor in the satori. Thanks, too, for your kind congratulations! I'm so thrilled the,committee liked it enough to award their kind recognition. Thank you, my friend
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
-
Hi Karyn
I'm still laughing as I read your excellent haiku. Haha! I love how your mind thinks. LOL The committee made an excellent choice. I hope you are well and summer is being kind ... those awful floods in Texas, in France and here in Oz. So terrible to watch as King Tides slowly erode the beaches with homes and appartments ready to collapse into the sea. Take care sweetest. Huge hugs - Lovi xoxox
Comment from Just2Write
Congratulations on your 3rd place finish with this gem, Kayrn. Three heron's on the shore at the same time is a rare sight where I live.
They usually hunt/fish alone. Your words created a marvellous image in my mind's eye.
Rose.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2016
 |
Congratulations on your 3rd place finish with this gem, Kayrn. Three heron's on the shore at the same time is a rare sight where I live.
They usually hunt/fish alone. Your words created a marvellous image in my mind's eye.
Rose.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2016
-
Thank you for your very kind congratulations, Rose. I am truly thrilled. I know three herons would indeed be an unusual happening, but the name of the artist's company who has used some of my haiku on her notecards is 3herons, and I wanted to use her logo. Thanks!
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
-
I thought so. A lovely gesture.
Comment from MissMerri
I love this haiku... And may I add I'm super proud that Marti is using your art with hers. How wonderful to have your amazing haiku on her notecards!! This is so clear and evocative, you don't need any art with it but it would be fun to see it, nevertheless. I hope this does well in the contest. It should.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
|
I love this haiku... And may I add I'm super proud that Marti is using your art with hers. How wonderful to have your amazing haiku on her notecards!! This is so clear and evocative, you don't need any art with it but it would be fun to see it, nevertheless. I hope this does well in the contest. It should.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
-
Thank you for this wonderful review and your generous rating for my haiku, MM! I'm so appreciative to receive your comments for my writing, and your kind words are always encouraging.
I'm so honored to have my haiku on Marti's beautiful notecards. Her nature sketches are wonderful and truly inspiring.
Thank you with smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from Gone but not forgotten
Three Herons Wait deserves five stars! I live near a pond and watch them stand, as if in line, waiting for a fish or a vole to cross their paths. I never saw it quite so poetically, though. Thank you!
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
Three Herons Wait deserves five stars! I live near a pond and watch them stand, as if in line, waiting for a fish or a vole to cross their paths. I never saw it quite so poetically, though. Thank you!
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you, wordcraft, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem.
Smile,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you, wordcraft, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem.
Smile,
Indy :-)
Comment from mvbrooks
The poem is effective on its own, but the idea of cards with photos and matching/complimentary haikus is very appealing. Hope your uploading of art resolves itself soon. Succinct and effective.
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
The poem is effective on its own, but the idea of cards with photos and matching/complimentary haikus is very appealing. Hope your uploading of art resolves itself soon. Succinct and effective.
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you, mybrooks, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem. I can't tell you how thrilled I am that this talented artist has used some of my haiku for her cards.
Smile,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you, mybrooks, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem. I can't tell you how thrilled I am that this talented artist has used some of my haiku for her cards.
Smile,
Indy :-)
Comment from harmony13
Excellent Poem! The first two lines of this poem flow and connect well.
The last line says it all. I pictured the three herons and enjoyed the theme
of this poem. Hope you are doing well...........Maria
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
Excellent Poem! The first two lines of this poem flow and connect well.
The last line says it all. I pictured the three herons and enjoyed the theme
of this poem. Hope you are doing well...........Maria
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you, harmony, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem.
Smile,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you, harmony, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem.
Smile,
Indy :-)
Comment from nancyjam
I enjoyed your Haiku about
the Herons.
Clear image created in this
brief poem.
clever Satori.
I wish you luck in the contest.
Nancy
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
I enjoyed your Haiku about
the Herons.
Clear image created in this
brief poem.
clever Satori.
I wish you luck in the contest.
Nancy
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you, Nancy, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem. Thanks for mentioning the ah-ha line!
Smiles,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you, Nancy, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem. Thanks for mentioning the ah-ha line!
Smiles,
Indy :-)
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Sorry we didn't get to see the photo.
-Is there anything different about your computer?
-I love herons; they are so peaceful.
-You have a good haiku with good format.
-I can picture the herons waiting with their "infinite" patience.
-Good satori.
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
-Sorry we didn't get to see the photo.
-Is there anything different about your computer?
-I love herons; they are so peaceful.
-You have a good haiku with good format.
-I can picture the herons waiting with their "infinite" patience.
-Good satori.
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you, respa, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem. I don't know what's going on...I had no difficulty for years uploading photos from my iPad to my posts. But the last month or so, I've had no luck at all.
Smiles,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you, respa, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem. I don't know what's going on...I had no difficulty for years uploading photos from my iPad to my posts. But the last month or so, I've had no luck at all.
Smiles,
Indy :-)
-
You are very welcome for the review and sharing ideas. Have you checked with others on FS you know who use ipads? Maybe something was changed on FS. In the meantime, do you have a laptop you can use? Also, usually M. Cahill or Dean Kuch is good with this kind of thing.
-
Thanks! I'll try to investigate the issue. I tried Tom, but he wasn't able to help...so I'll try Mikey.
:-)
-
Sounds like a good idea. Good luck!
Comment from rspoet
This is a fine entry for the haiku contest
Very good concise syllables at 4-6-2
Excellent concrete imagery in the herons/lakeshore
with solid grammatical connection
Fine reflective satori line with a touch of alliteration
Nice presentation with the water blue background
well done
Best wishes in the contest
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
This is a fine entry for the haiku contest
Very good concise syllables at 4-6-2
Excellent concrete imagery in the herons/lakeshore
with solid grammatical connection
Fine reflective satori line with a touch of alliteration
Nice presentation with the water blue background
well done
Best wishes in the contest
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you for this kind review for my haiku, rspoet. I'm delighted you enjoyed the imagery, and appreciate your taking the time to read and share your kind words.
Smiles,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you for this kind review for my haiku, rspoet. I'm delighted you enjoyed the imagery, and appreciate your taking the time to read and share your kind words.
Smiles,
Indy :-)
Comment from JennC
Nice job with this! You did a great job painting a picture with your words. I like my haikus simple and easy to follow, and this one is. Very well done. Good luck!
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
|
Nice job with this! You did a great job painting a picture with your words. I like my haikus simple and easy to follow, and this one is. Very well done. Good luck!
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
-
Thank you, Jenn, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem.
Smile,
Indy :-)
-
Thank you, Jenn, for your kind review and comments for my haiku. I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your thoughts, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed the poem.
Smile,
Indy :-)
