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Little Poems

Viewing comments for Chapter 396 "Daily Walk"
Small and Specialty Poems

18 total reviews 
Comment from tfawcus
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Your modifications work just fine. I think the Quatern lends itself to a certain amount of variation. Yours flows very smoothly and the consistent iambic pentameter echoes the footsteps of the walkers.

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 06-Apr-2016
    Thank you Tony, I'm glad you agree.
Comment from Joan E.
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I enjoyed your cascading refrain, rhymes and rhythm that seemed to mimic the pace of your walks. Thanks for sharing the view across the bridge as well. Big cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Joan, always glad to show off Minnesota.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
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This{nphotograph} was taken by the author himself
There is a small nit there in your notes. This is a well written Quatern Tom. I have been wanting to write on lately but my muse has deserted me. I do enjoy your work. Nancy

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Nancy
Comment from Pantygynt
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I like my quaterns to rhyme too. There is something thematic about that a rhyme running through the whole poem. It really backs up the repeated line even though the other as are not of themselves repeats. Yes, rhyming it makes for a more complex poem and one that is altogether more interesting.

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Pantygynt. That's why I don't understand Japanese poetry. Why would a Poet outlaw rhyme and alliteration?
reply by Pantygynt on 05-Apr-2016
    Plobabry because they can't plonounce their retters plopery
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Ah solo!
Comment from rhymelord
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Dear Tom,
I seem to notice that you love to write about your locale and the wonderful things one can see in quite mundane situations. You can certainly draw great pictures and in immaculate verse. Love it!
Reg

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Reg. yes. I see beauty all around.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
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This is a lovely poem, Tom, and more-so knowing your wife is now enjoying waling again. (I am too!) You can write a poem about anything you see, that is really good, because there is art in everything if we only look for it. I enjoyed my stroll with you, my friend. Well done! xsx Sandra

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Sandra. I am pleased that you are walking again too. That must mean your second surgery resolved the major problem. I am happy for you.
reply by Sandra Stoner-Mitchell on 05-Apr-2016
    Yes, I am, thank you, Tom, it is so nice to be pain free again, and be able to go for our walks.
Comment from brenda bickers
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Hi Treischel,
I read your author notes that say there is no rhyming structure, how ever the poem rhymes in every line all but one which threw me a little as it is right in the middle of the poem it interrupted the flow. I would be tempted to add rhyme on this line and make this a rhyming poem
All I all a really nice poem.
Brenda

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Brenda. I did go on in my notes to say that I modified the format to add rhyme. You must think walk and unlock don't rhyme, but they do. It's just slant rhyme, rather than perfect rhyme. At any rate, I appreciate your comments.
Comment from IndianaIrish
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An enjoyable poem with good descriptions of why you take a daily walk with your wife. I think it's wonderful you spend that special time together. Your Quaternary reads well with your rhyme and enjambment.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)

 Comment Written 05-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Karyn. I am so happy that after her knee surgery, we can walk together again.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
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Your poem has great flow, and I enjoyed the rhyme. The picture is awesome. I can understand why you would want to write about that walk on the bridge. Your chosen format worked well with your words. Good job and thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 04-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you very much Jannypan, it is a popular place to walk in town. No cars allowed on it.
reply by Jannypan (Jan) on 05-Apr-2016
    we have a smelly drainage ditch with no walkway
Comment from Liberty Justice
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I do enjoy a daily walk so peaceful comforting. To commune with nature normally serene and therapeutic. Watching birds fly and grass and flowers grow. liberty justice

 Comment Written 04-Apr-2016


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016
    Thank you Liberty. Yes, it's all that.