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Little Poems

Viewing comments for Chapter 386 "Trail Transitions"
Small and Specialty Poems

15 total reviews 
Comment from Joan E.
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You are indefatigable--another new form! Thanks for sharing one of your favorite walking spots in both the photograph and poem. I enjoyed the multiple internal rhymes plus the end rhymes. Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2016
    Thank you Joan,
Comment from IndianaIrish
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Wow, this is a great form that I've never seen fore, Treischel. I liked the rhyme pattern, and it reads easy and smooth. Your photograph is lovely...as usual.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)

 Comment Written 14-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 14-Mar-2016
    Thank you Karyn.
Comment from robyn corum
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Tom,

Another beautiful picture AND a beautiful poem to go along with it! This, too, was a new form for me, and I really, REALLY liked it! I think you handled it brilliantly - making it look soooo simple, when I'm sure it's not!! *smile*

Thanks for sharing!

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Robyn.i like your enthusiasm.
Comment from brenda bickers
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What a beautiful place to live, the colours are breath taking. I love that time of year.
Your poem described a perfect walk through natures beauty.
Brenda

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Brenda. It is so lovely here in the fall.
Comment from Pantygynt
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It would appear then that with the Rhupunt long it was the Welsh who invented the idea of the Cleave. Your example here certainly. Should you ever have to say this word out lout remember that the U is pronounced EE. This is a clever little version of the form.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Pantygynt. I didn't know that, appreciate the language lesson.
reply by Pantygynt on 13-Mar-2016
    In a song I wrote on the Welsh alphabet and its pronunciation are the immortal lines "ee" is the sound made by I and by U one F's a V; to say F**** it needs two. Lol.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Hah! Love it!
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
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A great flowing poem. The spirit flies over the beautiful park to see everything around in WO der. I would wander their for hours. An awesome photo.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Sandra.
Comment from ciliverde
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Another Welsh form, eh, I see you have been reading up on the forms - unless you knew them already. Cool stuff. This little poem is more complicated than it looks at first glance, and is expertly done - it just flies off the tongue.

Love this line "They make me whole as I extoll them, when I write."

Very nicely done!
Carol

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Carol. I look forward to reading more of yours.
Comment from MariMc
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I wasn't sure about this at first; it seemed an awkward format and a reach to make it all fit. Upon re-reading, I felt its appeal in the internal rhymes and of course the topic of musing upon the natural world, extolling all the beauty. Not an easy style to work in (play with), and it's nicely done.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you MariMc. I appreciate that you took the time to read it again.
Comment from Leineco
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It's a lovely message, what a poetic walk in the woods :-)

I'm not sure I like the 16 syllable approach, it seems so
perfectly geared for four syllable stanzas. But I can see
the allure of stretching the lines out. (actually, just because
I am contrary -lol- I think I read it as if it were eight
syllable lines)

Very nicely written :-)

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Lienco. I was tempted myself to keep it as 4 syllable quatrains.
Comment from Marykelly
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The description of the walking trails is vivid and colorful. The internal rhyme makes the narrative move quickly like the speaker is walking while talking. The emotion in the poem is the sense of wonder at nature's beauty. well done

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
    Thank you Marykelly. I am pleased you enjoyed it.