Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 384 "As River Flows to Ocean"Small and Specialty Poems
15 total reviews
Comment from ciliverde
Excellent poem. I found the variation in meter and syllable count interesting and it read well aloud. Even the shape of it on the page (or screen, to be more accurate) looks interesting.
I like your repeating line throughout, 'as river flows ~ to ocean' - it ties it all together nicely.
Oh, the Baptists are the ones who do their Baptism right in the water, yes? Just one of the many, many uses of water. In fact, it is essential to life on earth - as you say.
Well done! I enjoyed this,
Carol
reply by the author on 15-Mar-2016
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Excellent poem. I found the variation in meter and syllable count interesting and it read well aloud. Even the shape of it on the page (or screen, to be more accurate) looks interesting.
I like your repeating line throughout, 'as river flows ~ to ocean' - it ties it all together nicely.
Oh, the Baptists are the ones who do their Baptism right in the water, yes? Just one of the many, many uses of water. In fact, it is essential to life on earth - as you say.
Well done! I enjoyed this,
Carol
Comment Written 15-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 15-Mar-2016
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Thank you so very much Carol. I helps me out, too. Sorry it had no money left.
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No problem! I like your poetry :)
Comment from foxangie123
I think I may of reviewed this before but it may be your type of writing I'm used too. Either way it's as great as the first time as well as it will be if last. Bravo.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
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I think I may of reviewed this before but it may be your type of writing I'm used too. Either way it's as great as the first time as well as it will be if last. Bravo.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
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Thank you foxangie.
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You are always welcome dear. Xo
Comment from prettybluebirds
Excellent. You are sending a wonderful and true message with this writing. If we don't take care of our planet, it won't take care of us. So many rivers and streams are already polluted. This is good work. I could find no errors.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
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Excellent. You are sending a wonderful and true message with this writing. If we don't take care of our planet, it won't take care of us. So many rivers and streams are already polluted. This is good work. I could find no errors.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2016
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Thank you Prettybluebirds. I am glad my work connected with you in some way.
Comment from sunnilicious
Catchy rhymes to tell a story of the river and ocean. Cute relationship. Definitely creative. Well thought out. I like the repeat line at the end of each verse as a remind. Not the least obtrusive. Nicely written. Wonderful work
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2016
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Catchy rhymes to tell a story of the river and ocean. Cute relationship. Definitely creative. Well thought out. I like the repeat line at the end of each verse as a remind. Not the least obtrusive. Nicely written. Wonderful work
Comment Written 08-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2016
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Thank you Sunnylicious. I appreciate this review and the stars. You are a gem.
Comment from patcelaw
Nicely written . I like the rhyming scheme and the syllable count. It almost makes the poem look like a wide river on the page. Blessings for a great week, Patricia
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2016
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Nicely written . I like the rhyming scheme and the syllable count. It almost makes the poem look like a wide river on the page. Blessings for a great week, Patricia
Comment Written 07-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2016
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Thank you very much, Patricia.
Comment from NicciFaye
I like how each stanza contributes to the usage and beauty of water. You close this wonderful poem with a praise as well as a warning about the water we use. Everyone uses water for some or another. Enjoyed this!
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2016
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I like how each stanza contributes to the usage and beauty of water. You close this wonderful poem with a praise as well as a warning about the water we use. Everyone uses water for some or another. Enjoyed this!
Comment Written 07-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2016
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Thank you Nicci. Glad you liked it and caught the nuances of the closing.
Comment from His Grayness
As always from this brilliant author, a beautifully presented gift of knowledge and wisdom, packaged with the heart of a true teacher and poet. With gratitude: HIS GRAYNESS; Vance
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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As always from this brilliant author, a beautifully presented gift of knowledge and wisdom, packaged with the heart of a true teacher and poet. With gratitude: HIS GRAYNESS; Vance
Comment Written 06-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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Thank you Vance for this fine review and hpsuch high regard.
Comment from Joan E.
Thank you for sharing some of the history and current events of Minneapolis. Your photograph made me feel as though I was standing on the bridge with you. I like the shape of your stanzas with the longer fifth line and rhymes along with the repeats and modified repeat. Here's to protecting the environment! -Joan
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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Thank you for sharing some of the history and current events of Minneapolis. Your photograph made me feel as though I was standing on the bridge with you. I like the shape of your stanzas with the longer fifth line and rhymes along with the repeats and modified repeat. Here's to protecting the environment! -Joan
Comment Written 06-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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Thank you Joan. Always happy to add some history.
Comment from Marykelly
The refrain, as river flows to ocean, is like a drum beat reminding us of the permanency of nature's pattern especially the flow of precious water. Your imagery is creative and quite beautiful and the message is undoubtedly clear, the need to care for our life-sustaining resources.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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The refrain, as river flows to ocean, is like a drum beat reminding us of the permanency of nature's pattern especially the flow of precious water. Your imagery is creative and quite beautiful and the message is undoubtedly clear, the need to care for our life-sustaining resources.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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Thank you very much Marykelly. I am p,eased that you enjoyed it. Now I'll let you in on a secret. It's written to the tempo of Simon and Garfunkel's, "The Sounds of Silence."
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I can hear that favorite song of mine now that you mention it.
Comment from BruceMiller
I have a lot to learn about poetry. I look at many offerings but pass on them because I just don't understand them, and that, I believe, nullifies my right to judge them. I did, basically, like your work, but I wasn't comfortable with the unevenness of the stanza structure. That is, until I got to your comments, and I saw the light-oh, you did that on purpose! Duh! on my part. I went back up for a second helping. I found myself entertained by your effort...and I think I got a bit of education! Please accept a "Well Done" from a novice. Cheers.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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I have a lot to learn about poetry. I look at many offerings but pass on them because I just don't understand them, and that, I believe, nullifies my right to judge them. I did, basically, like your work, but I wasn't comfortable with the unevenness of the stanza structure. That is, until I got to your comments, and I saw the light-oh, you did that on purpose! Duh! on my part. I went back up for a second helping. I found myself entertained by your effort...and I think I got a bit of education! Please accept a "Well Done" from a novice. Cheers.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2016
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Thank you Bruce. I appreciate you comments. You might be interested to know that I modeled the stanza's based on one of the best written songs of all time, "The Sounds of Silence", by Simon and Garfunkel.
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I remember it well; a beautiful song. Cheers.
