Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 351 "Antique Bicycle"Small and Specialty Poems
16 total reviews
Comment from LateBloomer
Hello Treischel, Excellent graphic in a poem. There's no way around it, your poem is six-star worthy. Creating such a poem is no easy feat. I especially liked:
Riding on rubber tires
Of real steel
(Built during a time when everything was real, including people.)
Thank you for the author's notes. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2015
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Hello Treischel, Excellent graphic in a poem. There's no way around it, your poem is six-star worthy. Creating such a poem is no easy feat. I especially liked:
Riding on rubber tires
Of real steel
(Built during a time when everything was real, including people.)
Thank you for the author's notes. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
Comment Written 21-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2015
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Thank you very much, LateBloomer, fir a wonderful review.
Comment from Green Lake Girl
What an enjoyable poem, Tom! The Calligram is very interesting and delightful to read. One of my favorite subjects; bikes.
Never knew what a penny farthing was. You never know what you're going to learn on FanStory. Well done.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2015
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What an enjoyable poem, Tom! The Calligram is very interesting and delightful to read. One of my favorite subjects; bikes.
Never knew what a penny farthing was. You never know what you're going to learn on FanStory. Well done.
Comment Written 20-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2015
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Thank you, glad you enjoyed it and learned something new.
Comment from robyn corum
I think you've created a wonderful image of a bicycle - the 'penny-farthing' (so glad you explained that - fascinating!) looks perfectly shaped and I'm sure it took some time to create. Kudos!
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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I think you've created a wonderful image of a bicycle - the 'penny-farthing' (so glad you explained that - fascinating!) looks perfectly shaped and I'm sure it took some time to create. Kudos!
Comment Written 19-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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Thank you Robyn. It took many hours.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, treischel, I love those style of bikes, don't know if I would ever try to ride one of them though, lol. watched mike and frank from the antique show have problems maneauvering one of them. I enjoyed reading this.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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this is an excellent write, treischel, I love those style of bikes, don't know if I would ever try to ride one of them though, lol. watched mike and frank from the antique show have problems maneauvering one of them. I enjoyed reading this.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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Thank you sweetwoodjax. I am sure it's very tricky.
Comment from ProSongwriter
Hi ...
This is very creative and a lot of fun! I am not a poem by even the loosest and most ambiguous of definitions, so I had no idea of the format. But the poem and the graphic are so perfectly intertwined, not just in the relative context, but rather in their intrinsic symbolism. And your brief history was a pleasure to read ... thank you!
Merry Christmas ...
Alan
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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Hi ...
This is very creative and a lot of fun! I am not a poem by even the loosest and most ambiguous of definitions, so I had no idea of the format. But the poem and the graphic are so perfectly intertwined, not just in the relative context, but rather in their intrinsic symbolism. And your brief history was a pleasure to read ... thank you!
Merry Christmas ...
Alan
Comment Written 18-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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Thank you Alan, Merry Christmas to you too.
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You are very welcome. And thanks for the Christmas wishes.
Comment from Joan E.
I cannot imagine trying to create your intricate word image regardless the program! It certainly expresses visually what the words say. Thank you for your notes on the Penny-farthing and adding an easy to read version of your poem with its random rhymes. Well done! -Joan
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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I cannot imagine trying to create your intricate word image regardless the program! It certainly expresses visually what the words say. Thank you for your notes on the Penny-farthing and adding an easy to read version of your poem with its random rhymes. Well done! -Joan
Comment Written 18-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2015
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Thank you Joan, thapese are very challenging, but fun to do.
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Keep having fun and happy holidays- Joan
Comment from scd41
what a Calligram is. Secondly, you have brought life to antique bicycle which was thought to be dead and forgotten. In my childhood, I had seen those bicycles in circus and when the clown rode it there were always guffaws around. You have done the right thing to put the text of the poem as part of author notes.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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what a Calligram is. Secondly, you have brought life to antique bicycle which was thought to be dead and forgotten. In my childhood, I had seen those bicycles in circus and when the clown rode it there were always guffaws around. You have done the right thing to put the text of the poem as part of author notes.
Comment Written 18-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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Thank you scd41, I'm glad it helped. Suggestion of reviewers okay off.
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Thank you scd41, I'm glad it helped. Suggestion of reviewers pay off.
Comment from William Ross
Very good, very well done, great job on this, I wish I had the 6 stars to give you on this it's worth it. Wonderful job. One of the hardest type poems I think to do successfully.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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Very good, very well done, great job on this, I wish I had the 6 stars to give you on this it's worth it. Wonderful job. One of the hardest type poems I think to do successfully.
Comment Written 18-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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Stank you William. For sure it is not easy.
Comment from Pantygynt
You did several of these earlier in the year if I remember right. Getting on and off these things must have been an art of its own. A new slant on the Christmas card. No! Please!
No calligrams of Christmas trees!
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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You did several of these earlier in the year if I remember right. Getting on and off these things must have been an art of its own. A new slant on the Christmas card. No! Please!
No calligrams of Christmas trees!
Comment Written 18-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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Thank you Pantygynt. Yes indeed, I did a boat, a car, and a plane in April. Don't worry. The only other Calligram I have planned is a hot-air balloon. Hmm, I thought you would have a comment on the British aspect on this poem.
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Well they were a bit before my time really. Lol.
Comment from Chris B
I really liked your Calligram - I am from England so I have fond memories of the penny farthing, as in the coin, although metricisation or decimalisation was introduced just before I arrived on the scene. In your poem, I would like to see more reference to the penny farthing, even though, as you mentioned, the word wasn't in use until later, but many people love the concept and that word, so please use it more.
2. I noticed there is a spelling mistake in your line,
"Unfortunately, I can't get the image large enough, so several people have said the can't read the words, so I thought I'd help out by listing the text here."
You need to correct the word "the" to "they."
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This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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I really liked your Calligram - I am from England so I have fond memories of the penny farthing, as in the coin, although metricisation or decimalisation was introduced just before I arrived on the scene. In your poem, I would like to see more reference to the penny farthing, even though, as you mentioned, the word wasn't in use until later, but many people love the concept and that word, so please use it more.
2. I noticed there is a spelling mistake in your line,
"Unfortunately, I can't get the image large enough, so several people have said the can't read the words, so I thought I'd help out by listing the text here."
You need to correct the word "the" to "they."
.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2015
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Thank you Chris. I fixed the error and added a Penny-farthing line into the poem.
