Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 341 "Quiet Streets"Small and Specialty Poems
15 total reviews
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Treischel,
"Quiet Streets" is an excellent poem with colorful imagery and good figurative language (the bards proclaim, nature's wonders that proclaim) The rhyme is excellent and rhyme pattern followed. The requirements of the form are met and the structure pleasing to the eye.
Your friend and colleague,
Preston
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2015
  |
Hi, Treischel,
"Quiet Streets" is an excellent poem with colorful imagery and good figurative language (the bards proclaim, nature's wonders that proclaim) The rhyme is excellent and rhyme pattern followed. The requirements of the form are met and the structure pleasing to the eye.
Your friend and colleague,
Preston
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2015
-
Thank you Preston for a excellent review.
Comment from amada
I had to comment in these lines "Quiet streets/enhance the home displays/as lawns carpeted in brand new gown." It reads as a haiku! Best wishes and keep warm. :-)
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
|
I had to comment in these lines "Quiet streets/enhance the home displays/as lawns carpeted in brand new gown." It reads as a haiku! Best wishes and keep warm. :-)
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
-
Thank you Amanda. Good observation.
Comment from Joan E.
You certainly captured the fall colors in your photograph, and your Triquain Swirl poem applauds the season so well with its repeats and rhymes. Many cheers and season's greetings- Joan
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
|
You certainly captured the fall colors in your photograph, and your Triquain Swirl poem applauds the season so well with its repeats and rhymes. Many cheers and season's greetings- Joan
Comment Written 29-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
-
Thank you Joan.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, treischel, you did an excellent job writing this triquein swirl poem about the change from fall to winter, I love the picture, it is gorgeous and I wish I could have it for a desktop picture.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
|
this is an excellent write, treischel, you did an excellent job writing this triquein swirl poem about the change from fall to winter, I love the picture, it is gorgeous and I wish I could have it for a desktop picture.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
-
Thank you sweetwoodjax. It would make a good one at that.
Comment from Pantygynt
Well we have no snow here, just almost incessent rain and blustery wind. The latter has all but stripped the trees down to bare poles.
While being something of a technical masterpiece, I can't help feeling that your chosen form has got in the way of the scene you are trying to portray. It really does seem to m to be a triumph of form over content, although I don't think anyone could have done better than you, given the restrictions of the chosen form.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
|
Well we have no snow here, just almost incessent rain and blustery wind. The latter has all but stripped the trees down to bare poles.
While being something of a technical masterpiece, I can't help feeling that your chosen form has got in the way of the scene you are trying to portray. It really does seem to m to be a triumph of form over content, although I don't think anyone could have done better than you, given the restrictions of the chosen form.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
-
Thank you Pantygynt. I was intrigued by the possibilities of the form. You can play with different rhyme schemes, or none, but the line structure is limiting.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A beautiful poem to end the season of fall. Winter is definitely at your doorstep. I like this form of poem. Your photo is an excellent compliment to your poem.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
|
A beautiful poem to end the season of fall. Winter is definitely at your doorstep. I like this form of poem. Your photo is an excellent compliment to your poem.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
-
Thank you Sandra.
Comment from Liberty Justice
Such beautifully creative animation and vivid imagery. I love the wild color scheme of the falling leaves and lawns!! One can see it is Fall!
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
|
Such beautifully creative animation and vivid imagery. I love the wild color scheme of the falling leaves and lawns!! One can see it is Fall!
Comment Written 28-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2015
-
Thank you Liberty. A lovely review.
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Treischel: you are amazing poet with your rhymes and swirls of words. I like the photo on Summit with quiet streets and colorful leaves. So many cars in Minneapolis, especially Uptown. We had snow down south here on Hwy 90 and 71. Great control of your words and syllables! Hope your holidays are awesome! flylikeaneagle
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2015
|
Treischel: you are amazing poet with your rhymes and swirls of words. I like the photo on Summit with quiet streets and colorful leaves. So many cars in Minneapolis, especially Uptown. We had snow down south here on Hwy 90 and 71. Great control of your words and syllables! Hope your holidays are awesome! flylikeaneagle
Comment Written 28-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2015
-
Thank you flylikeaneagleaneagle. I think your snow was heavier than here. Happy holidays to you too.
Comment from Pyrrho
I often wondered if the Autumn colors have their origin in a Darwinian survival trait or requirement, but cannot imagine what it can be. Great poem. BTW.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2015
|
I often wondered if the Autumn colors have their origin in a Darwinian survival trait or requirement, but cannot imagine what it can be. Great poem. BTW.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2015
-
Thank you, Pyrrho. I can't imagine that either.
Comment from Jesse James Doty
A wonderful poem about the fall. You obviously rise to the challenge of making a difficult poem. It reads nice and follows the style you have chosen to write. I get somewhat overwhelmed with such details, but you seem to thrive on them. Good for you. I admire someone, like you, who can write within such constraints, and still have it turn out well. I like the message and am amazed at the structure. Thank you for teaching me aboutTriquain Swirls. And, thank you for sharing your talent with me.
Peace, Jesse James
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2015
|
A wonderful poem about the fall. You obviously rise to the challenge of making a difficult poem. It reads nice and follows the style you have chosen to write. I get somewhat overwhelmed with such details, but you seem to thrive on them. Good for you. I admire someone, like you, who can write within such constraints, and still have it turn out well. I like the message and am amazed at the structure. Thank you for teaching me aboutTriquain Swirls. And, thank you for sharing your talent with me.
Peace, Jesse James
Comment Written 28-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2015
-
Thank you Jesse, I do enjoy the challenge.
-
I admire you for enjoying the challenge, and for pulling it off.
