Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 338 "Terror, Horror, and False Faith"Small and Specialty Poems
9 total reviews
Comment from Christof McTarnahan
I agree with your sentiments, Tom. The poem as usual, is spot on. The triquatrain is a tough one to perfect, but you pulled it off.Good work my friend.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2015
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I agree with your sentiments, Tom. The poem as usual, is spot on. The triquatrain is a tough one to perfect, but you pulled it off.Good work my friend.
Comment Written 24-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2015
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Thank you Christoff
Comment from I am Cat
Hello Tom,
I've come back to this piece with a six star rating...
Not because it's about the Paris tragedy... though it does tell that story well...
but because it is SO well written... the internal rhyme and the perfect
rhythm throughout is just spot on and it makes for a delightful reading!
I was so impressed with, not only your form, but your word choices...
restaurants/haunts
god/flawed
source/discourse...
and these two stanzas...
And it's a shame when soccer games
Become a hunting ground
For evil men who ambush when
There's no defense around.
Their thoughts of God are deeply flawed,
Since they have been misled.
As Satan's plans in ISIS hands
Brings only blameless dead.
perfection!
well done Tom... I wouldn't be surprised to see this in the POM booth next month
Cat
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2015
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Hello Tom,
I've come back to this piece with a six star rating...
Not because it's about the Paris tragedy... though it does tell that story well...
but because it is SO well written... the internal rhyme and the perfect
rhythm throughout is just spot on and it makes for a delightful reading!
I was so impressed with, not only your form, but your word choices...
restaurants/haunts
god/flawed
source/discourse...
and these two stanzas...
And it's a shame when soccer games
Become a hunting ground
For evil men who ambush when
There's no defense around.
Their thoughts of God are deeply flawed,
Since they have been misled.
As Satan's plans in ISIS hands
Brings only blameless dead.
perfection!
well done Tom... I wouldn't be surprised to see this in the POM booth next month
Cat
Comment Written 22-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2015
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As always, a very astute assessment, Cat, thank you!
Comment from robyn corum
Tom,
I won't say I enjoyed this poem, but I did enjoy your usual style and lovely way with words. It's true that these terrorists are becoming all too good with their plans to create terror throughout the world. It's so sad what a 'few' zealots can do to millions.
Thanks!
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2015
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Tom,
I won't say I enjoyed this poem, but I did enjoy your usual style and lovely way with words. It's true that these terrorists are becoming all too good with their plans to create terror throughout the world. It's so sad what a 'few' zealots can do to millions.
Thanks!
Comment Written 21-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2015
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Thank you robyn.
Comment from Joan E.
I admired your choice of forms for this commentary poem. The variety of the rhyme patterns in the quatrains is quite effective. Thank you for sharing your reflections about the tragic events in Paris. Warm regards- Joan
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2015
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I admired your choice of forms for this commentary poem. The variety of the rhyme patterns in the quatrains is quite effective. Thank you for sharing your reflections about the tragic events in Paris. Warm regards- Joan
Comment Written 20-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2015
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Thank you Joan. Are you home now?
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Yes, we a back safe and sound--just getting over the 17-hour time differential!
Here's to a serene weekend- Joan
Comment from Pantygynt
This is an excellent comment on the lates obscenities committed in the name of god. And all set out in a very tight form. You are to be congratulated that this did not turn out to be a triumph of form over content. But it didn't. I t is all good but I particularly liked this couplet with its serpent like hissing alliteration that reminded me of one of Satan's oldest guises.
"As Satan's plans in ISIS hands
Brings only blameless dead."
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2015
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This is an excellent comment on the lates obscenities committed in the name of god. And all set out in a very tight form. You are to be congratulated that this did not turn out to be a triumph of form over content. But it didn't. I t is all good but I particularly liked this couplet with its serpent like hissing alliteration that reminded me of one of Satan's oldest guises.
"As Satan's plans in ISIS hands
Brings only blameless dead."
Comment Written 20-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2015
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Thank you Pantygynt. Hadn't thought about it, but glad you pointed it out.
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Treischel,
"Terror, Horror, False Faith" is an excellent poetic indictment of ISIS for the destruction and death recently caused by the attack on Paris. It has excellent figurative language e.g."jihad's error brings terror". It has good meter.
It calls for "the eradication:of the cause source of false discourse" but does not explicitly state that it had to be done violently.
Your friend and colleague,
Preston
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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Hi, Treischel,
"Terror, Horror, False Faith" is an excellent poetic indictment of ISIS for the destruction and death recently caused by the attack on Paris. It has excellent figurative language e.g."jihad's error brings terror". It has good meter.
It calls for "the eradication:of the cause source of false discourse" but does not explicitly state that it had to be done violently.
Your friend and colleague,
Preston
Comment Written 20-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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Thank you Preston. I didn't rule out violently, but if there is some other way, I open to it. But right not we need to put boots on the ground and wipe out their military capability and training grounds. Not just the U.S., but all of NATO.
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O.K. But I prefer not to rule out any options which might be caused by screams for vengeance.
Preston
Comment from Spiritual Echo
I think poem is elegant, if one can say such a thing about this subject. I do take issue with your first line. It was not a jihad error, but rather their INTENT. An error would suggest a mistake. I doubt they'd consider their success as an error.
I agree eradicate until we awaken the Arab world to take their own bloody actions against their neighbours.
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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I think poem is elegant, if one can say such a thing about this subject. I do take issue with your first line. It was not a jihad error, but rather their INTENT. An error would suggest a mistake. I doubt they'd consider their success as an error.
I agree eradicate until we awaken the Arab world to take their own bloody actions against their neighbours.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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Thank you Spiritual Echo. I take you points.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Beautiful image that you chose to illustrate your poem. The format is interesting, but seems difficult. However, you did a great job. I like the internal rhyme the touches of alliteration. Your poem has great flow from line to line making a great, strong statement.
I see no changes. Good job and thanks for sharing and caring.
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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Beautiful image that you chose to illustrate your poem. The format is interesting, but seems difficult. However, you did a great job. I like the internal rhyme the touches of alliteration. Your poem has great flow from line to line making a great, strong statement.
I see no changes. Good job and thanks for sharing and caring.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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Thank you Jannypan for such a wonderful review.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very interesting poem form I will study this form. Yes, the senseless killings is a disgrace to humanity. They are really willingly misled by their leaders.
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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A very interesting poem form I will study this form. Yes, the senseless killings is a disgrace to humanity. They are really willingly misled by their leaders.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2015
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Thank you Sandra. Sad, but true.
