Magic Orange Line
Grown ups never uderstand life16 total reviews
Comment from Sis Cat
Your story brought back memories of me drawing with crayons, creating magical worlds as the lines come alive. Your story is animated and visual. It also touched the heart. I can never draw today the lines I drew as a child when the vibrated on the page. Yes, they live only in my memory.
I only suggest a period instead of an "*."
Thank you for sharing. I wish you success in the contest.
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Your story brought back memories of me drawing with crayons, creating magical worlds as the lines come alive. Your story is animated and visual. It also touched the heart. I can never draw today the lines I drew as a child when the vibrated on the page. Yes, they live only in my memory.
I only suggest a period instead of an "*."
Thank you for sharing. I wish you success in the contest.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2015
Comment from petalangela
A sad story of the reality of being an adult. . How naked we feel when our childhood fantasy are ripped away from us. All children should be allowed to fantasy good things and feed on the goodness throughout life
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A sad story of the reality of being an adult. . How naked we feel when our childhood fantasy are ripped away from us. All children should be allowed to fantasy good things and feed on the goodness throughout life
Comment Written 12-Sep-2015
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, apelle, I love the sweet innocence of this one, the magic that caused the lines to wake up. I was going through the contests that have one to see if someone that is in contests lately reviewed and I came across this, I am sorry you didn't win. I have a problem with someone in the contest that never reviews the entries in the contests they are in. I am almost to the point of not entering them. tom told me those who write in a contest are not required to review the other entrants. I know that but it bugs me they aren't playing fair.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2015
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this is an excellent write, apelle, I love the sweet innocence of this one, the magic that caused the lines to wake up. I was going through the contests that have one to see if someone that is in contests lately reviewed and I came across this, I am sorry you didn't win. I have a problem with someone in the contest that never reviews the entries in the contests they are in. I am almost to the point of not entering them. tom told me those who write in a contest are not required to review the other entrants. I know that but it bugs me they aren't playing fair.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2015
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You are absolutely right, everybody that enters a contest should review the other contestants entries and unfortunately I failed myself way too many times. Your words are my wake up call and I promise myself to be more attentive to every body 's work after all it takes a village to raise child, or writer for that matter... right ?
Thanks so much
Adina
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You are absolutely right, everybody that enters a contest should review the other contestants entries and unfortunately I failed myself way too many times. Your words are my wake up call and I promise myself to be more attentive to every body 's work after all it takes a village to raise child, or writer for that matter... right ?
Thanks so much
Adina
Comment from Nosha17
The reason I like your story because it is different from the other entries I have read, it is more unconventional. It shows the imagination of the writer to create an entity out of nothing and make it and the story come alive. I found nothing to correct apart from one thing in Para 1, better to say, I think I've got it. Good luck in the contest. faye
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The reason I like your story because it is different from the other entries I have read, it is more unconventional. It shows the imagination of the writer to create an entity out of nothing and make it and the story come alive. I found nothing to correct apart from one thing in Para 1, better to say, I think I've got it. Good luck in the contest. faye
Comment Written 11-Sep-2015
Comment from Spitfire
I take it the idea is "why didn't someone stop me from growing. You've done a fine lyrical piece that captures the magic of childhood that eventually loses its voice.
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I take it the idea is "why didn't someone stop me from growing. You've done a fine lyrical piece that captures the magic of childhood that eventually loses its voice.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2015
Comment from JTStone
I read your entry in the contest. That was a fully colorful and visual piece of artwork. Easy to follow and fun to read. Those are two of the most important things in a short.
I felt that you had a powerful, original work. I enjoyed my little romp into your imagination.
I look forward to reading more of your work--whoever you are...
JT
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I read your entry in the contest. That was a fully colorful and visual piece of artwork. Easy to follow and fun to read. Those are two of the most important things in a short.
I felt that you had a powerful, original work. I enjoyed my little romp into your imagination.
I look forward to reading more of your work--whoever you are...
JT
Comment Written 10-Sep-2015
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was certainly very different, very original, and a fun read. I don't think I have ever read a story about one little line! This was creative and very clever. Good luck in the contest. :) Sandra
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That was certainly very different, very original, and a fun read. I don't think I have ever read a story about one little line! This was creative and very clever. Good luck in the contest. :) Sandra
Comment Written 10-Sep-2015
Comment from Benjamin Valencia
Hi..Overall, the flow was good except for this line..
Back when I was a child and drew a line, straight, clear and brightly orange, I saw it come alive. (something's missing in this sentence)...Back when I was a child and I could draw a straight, clear and a bright orange did I see it come alinve It moved its puny body, and with a push--freed itself from the prison of white paper.
Good luck and cheers.
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Hi..Overall, the flow was good except for this line..
Back when I was a child and drew a line, straight, clear and brightly orange, I saw it come alive. (something's missing in this sentence)...Back when I was a child and I could draw a straight, clear and a bright orange did I see it come alinve It moved its puny body, and with a push--freed itself from the prison of white paper.
Good luck and cheers.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2015
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello :)
Your story description has a typo=Grown ups never[ uderstand ]life
I like your flash story about a magic line that apparently can move and watch itself on the mirror. It is a creative story. Good job!
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2015
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Hello :)
Your story description has a typo=Grown ups never[ uderstand ]life
I like your flash story about a magic line that apparently can move and watch itself on the mirror. It is a creative story. Good job!
Comment Written 10-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2015
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Thanks so much for the catch, much appreciated
Comment from Louise Michelle
This story is so charming. And what makes it special is the truth behind the words that you present in a creative way.
As children, our imaginations are not chained to conventional modes of thinking and behaving. You made this point so well in an adorable way.
Hugs,
Lou
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2015
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This story is so charming. And what makes it special is the truth behind the words that you present in a creative way.
As children, our imaginations are not chained to conventional modes of thinking and behaving. You made this point so well in an adorable way.
Hugs,
Lou
Comment Written 10-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2015
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Thanks so much, makes me happy to know you liked it
Adina
